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So Now You're a Zombie: A Handbook for the Newly Undead Paperback


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So Now You're a Zombie: A Handbook for the Newly Undead + The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead + The Zombie Survival Guide Deck: Complete Protection from the Living Dead
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Chicago Review Press (October 1, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1569763429
  • ISBN-13: 978-1569763421
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.3 x 0.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (53 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #90,348 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

There is more to undeath than shambling around in search of brains to eat, but not much more, according to this short but detailed look at the new zombie, or œzed,  lifestyle. Filled with deadpan tips on how to succeed in the coming zombie apocalypse, it covers the basics of caring for decomposing flesh ( œIf you experience an extreme freeze... your extremities should continue to function until they fall off ), practical suggestions for overcoming obstacles, and instructions for attacking the living ( œThe only thing more lethal than you is you on fire! ). The blood-splattered pages contain copious diagrams, such as a zombie food pyramid, pie charts of infection methods, and instructions for operating doorknobs. The illustrations are as grossly explicit as the text is employee-handbook underplayed, making this an excellent choice for the zombie completist.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

"An excellent choice for the zombie completist."  —Kirkus Reviews



“This book is a total blast and a must-have for zombie fans! Grade A.” —Mania.com


“The illustrations are as grossly explicit as the text is employee-handbook underplayed, making this an excellent choice for the zombie completist.” —Publishers Weekly


"Everything a new flesh eater needs to know about surviving in a world where you only want one thing: brains."  --Geek-span.com


"Brilliantly tongue-in-cheek. . . . A must for all fans of spoof manuals and zombies alike." —NY Journal of Books.com


"Explains everything a newly undead soul needs to hunt, fight and feed on the living." —Aolnews.com



"A parody with brains. . .  [the book] is just too funny to pass up." —NeoTokyoProject.com


"Austin's tongue-in-cheek humor perfectly compliments the subject matter." —ZombiePhiles.com 

More About the Author

John Austin worked as a senior toy designer in the Boy's Research and Development Department at Hasbro Toys. His principle area of expertise was the creative process of new product development. During his initial five years, he worked on popular brands like; Transformers, Star Wars, Iron Man, Spiderman, Jurassic Park, Tonka and Gi Joe. Skilled in 3D computer modeling, illustration and creative thinking, he brings many of these talents to the creation of his book projects, as well as ever-increasing market awareness for each individual product he works on.

For more information, fun free content and downloads, visit johnaustinbooks.com

Customer Reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
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This book is pretty funny!
Alexa
I sent mine to a friend in Brazil and he almost died laughing too, great gift.
Thais Malon
I love zombies and this book is a quick, fun, and easy read.
Book Sake

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

52 of 57 people found the following review helpful By ihavewebfeet on October 20, 2010
Format: Paperback
Another reviewer gave this book only a few stars based on the belief a Zombie could not read it and would never benefit from its wealth of useful information.

While this was once true, Zombies have evolved over time, and the old-school belief zombies still can't read is a myth. Zombies are somewhat intelligent, sensitive creatures (although, they might not seem sensitive by our preconceived human standards of sensitivity). While the loss of muscle tissue and some brain cells limit their communication abilities, they do think and are quite capable of following simple instructions, when they choose to (the activity MUST appear to benefit the Zombie in the long run, or you will receive little cooperation from them).
Even just a few years ago, it was believed that Zombie's still moved slowly and couldn't run, but we've all learned from some recent movies this is no longer the case. They simply have come to realize Humans (or Non-Zoms) tire easily when frightened and, in their fear of Zombies, make mistakes causing them to be more prone to capture, so there is simply no need to expel the energy needed to move quickly.

I'd highly recommend this book to any Zombie having issues coping with their current, un-dead condition. If there is a Zombie in your life with adjustment concerns, why not pick up a copy for him today?
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36 of 45 people found the following review helpful By Dave Price on May 20, 2011
Format: Paperback
I had to take off a star for using the z-word. These kinds of ethnic slurs have no place in civilized discourse.

That said, this is a useful and timely reference for the underprivileged Undead-Americans that face so much racism, prejudice and discrimination in today's overwhelmingly living-supremacist society.
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14 of 16 people found the following review helpful By Robert D. Queen on October 24, 2010
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is sick by incredibly funny. I have no idea how many beers it took to come up with the idea for this book, but the writer did a great job! He covers every topic any zombie needs to know. It includes diagrams on the Zombie Food Pyramid - Human Hunting Techniques - What types of Animals to eat and which ones to avoid - Maslow's Law for Zombies - Decaying Flesh Preservation - The History of Zombies - Spreading of the Z Virus. Most importantly this book contains that Zombie Code which must be followed and is punishable by decapitation.

You need to read this book. Once I started reading I couldn't stop!
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful By ZombieFan on October 19, 2010
Format: Paperback
I thought this was a great new book considering all the zombie material out there as it has some of the most information available for how to make the most of Zombieism. We are putting on a live performance on Zombies and will use this as a sure tool to depict the most Zombie realism. The only thing missing is a picture only flash card tear away that I can wear around my neck to re-reference after we all become Zombies.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Alengendro on February 7, 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Great quality in printing, packing and service. Perfect to learn about all Zombies things. You never imagine all the important information. Every body wants to read it to understand the Zombies behavior... Congratulations !!!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Michelle @ In Libris Veritas on November 10, 2011
Format: Paperback
I found this to be a nice little original zombie 'handbook'. There are a lot out there for the humans in-case of the whole zombie apocalypse but there are few in the way of providing help for the zombies. I found it to be occasionally witty and for the most part pretty interesting. It's a super quick read and has a lot of pictures but of the 'serious' nature and few that kind of goofy.
Despite it's clearly goofy nature there a re few tidbits that humans can harvest for future use if need be...and let's hope that there is never the need.
Anyway it's a quick entertaining read for the zombie 'lover'.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By N. Mounts on January 11, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book was written with not only humor in mind, but the fact that some people really do believe in the "zombie apocalypse."

For those of you who remember the movie "Beetlejuice," there is a prop in it called "The Handbook for the Recently Deceased." If the writers of "So Now You're a Zombie" could have written the handbook, the Maitland's might have not had such a hard time adjusting to being ghosts.

Pros:
Funny illustrations and guides
Tongue-in-cheek humor with references to both modern and classic zombie lore
Surprising ending for the truly paranoid amongst us

Cons:
A bit too short (but sometimes brevity is the better form of humor)
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Thais Malon on January 2, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Funniest thing I've ever read! I sent mine to a friend in Brazil and he almost died laughing too, great gift.
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