Customer Reviews

The Social Styles Handbook: Find Your Comfort Zone and Make People Feel Comfortable with You

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The Wilson Learning version of the social styles matrix is one of the most valuable interpersonal vocabulary lessons most of us should take. Although there have been modifications and restructuring of these principles over time, the basic message remains very clear and timely: There are recognizable patterns of social interaction; they can all be successful; they can be accomodated positively and negatively; and we can reach each other and encourage each other effectively by recognizing them and training ourselves to be flexible and empowering in our relationships with others.

The book is an excellent recap for those, like myself, who were formally trained by the folks at Wilson Learning. It is also an introduction worthy of passing on to any who have not had the privilege. I have purchased and shared three copies of this volume with my co-workers in the past two months, and we are having (once again) a whale of a time discovering how we behave towards each other and how those behaviors affect our productivity and job satisfaction.

Invaluable.

Social styles is one of many two-quadrant systems for explaining people's personalities and interactions. The unique perspective of this system is it is concerned with how other people perceive you. On one axis you are rated if you are concerned with people, or with tasks. On the other axis you are rated if you ask, or if you tell, when you want someone else to do something. No one social style is superior to another. The key to being effective is your ability to be flexible and work with the various social styles. Thus, style versatility is the second portion of the book.

I found this model very useful in all facets of my life. Where I work the dominant personality quadrant outnumbers the others 2:1 and determines the site's personality. We have a companion division with a different dominant personality - friction between the two sites on projects is just as the social styles predicts.

In my workplace this material is taught as Leadership Styles using materials Wilson Learning also prepared. The class to me presented the material much better than this book. The book is missing something - thus, minus a star.

Another book on the topic is "Personal Styles & Effective Performance" by
David W. Merrill and Roger H. Reid. According to my instructor, it is the original source which Wilson Learning and The Trane Co. created their respective training programs.

This book is a must if you interact at all with people...in or outside of a family, in public or at work. It addresses issues that all of us share and helps us to see how we act and how that develops how we interact w/ others and how that determines how they interact w/ us. Excellent book. I highly recommend it.

If you lead a nonprofit organization and depend on year-end donor gifts, you'll get plenty of wisdom from staff, board members and other donors about how the economy will affect giving. You'll need to filter that advice through your understanding of the four social styles: Analyticals, Drivers, Amiables and Expressives. It's all about finding your comfort zone and understanding the comfort zone of others, including donors.

Will your revenue go up or down next year? When making decisions, Analyticals avoid risk, based on facts. Drivers take risks, based on intuition. Amiables avoid risk, based on opinion. Expressives take risks, based on hunches. Do you have a mix of all four styles on your staff and board? Do you understand, and leverage, the social styles of your major donors?

Analyticals appreciate data. Your Vision 2020 proposal has 16 pages, but that may not be enough information for an Analytical. Donors who are drivers want you to get to the bottom line ASAP. Forget the PowerPoint and the chitchat. Amiables value an unhurried appointment with a focus on close relationships and peace. Yet Expressives value interaction, involvement and a fast pace. And don't make it boring!

Stop! Don't make one more donor call until you've read this book. While there are many good "people systems" out there going back as far as Hippocrates' four temperaments, I recommend you become a student of the four social styles. This system is easy to remember and doesn't require a one-day seminar or an expensive assessment. For more information and both faith-based and marketplace books (and the science behind the four social styles), read the People Bucket, one of 20 competencies in my book, Mastering The Management Buckets: 20 Critical Competencies for Leading Your Business or Non-profit.

To make it practical in the trenches, ask these two questions in your next staff meeting: 1) "Here's a copy of this month's direct mail donor appeal. Does it speak to all four social styles (Analyticals, Drivers, Expressives, and Amiables)? How could this letter be improved?" 2) "What social style is your pastor? Do the sermons routinely speak to all four social styles? Give examples."

francisco@yoursocialstyle.com
On these day of tech-changes and everything is changing up side down, never has been as necessary as it is now to nurture relationships. When Visionaries like Peter Drucker mention that knowledge society is here and we can prove that, the theme of social styles, show us the extent of working relationships, and in personal life!

Cogratulations to the people at Wilson Learning,

Francisco