31 of 33 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
A prescription for a more satisfying life, January 18, 2007
This review is from: The Soft Addiction Solution (Paperback)
Judith Wright's book is a must for anyone who's been looking for a way to add more "good stuff" (like time, money, and love) to their life while getting rid of the bad habits (like overeating, procrastinating, too much TV) that get in the way of them. I've personally discovered how much time I've wasted playing computer games and sitting in front of the TV. Not to mention the unconscious eating I've done. I've lost 35 pounds without trying just by paying attention to what goes in my mouth rather than mindlessly munching.
And it's not about deprivation - it's about adding things that are more nourishing than computer solitaire or too much food. So I feel more satisfied rather than less and filled up rather than overstuffed.
As a physician, I see the effects of our Soft Addictions all day, every day. I can't recommend this book highly enough.
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21 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Excellent ideas for a long article; poor style and not enough substance for a book, October 11, 2009
The concepts in this book are good, but if you are buying it, you are probably aware of the major concepts to a large extent. This book preaches to the converted and doesn't have all that much new to say to them. In condensed form, it would probably make an excellent magazine article, but the author's own goals of marketing and self-promotion unfortunately sabotage much of the merit of this book.
The good:
- The main idea: soft addictions, i.e. mindless routines and unproductive behaviors, consume a lot of time in most people's lives and rob us of time for doing things that would make us happier.
- The explanation: people resort to soft addictions when they can't deal with emotions such as anxiety, hurt, etc., or as an attempt to satisfy a a yearning they can't identify. This is probably the greatest strength of the book, as most people who realize they have soft addictions tend to blame themselves for being so "stupid" without understanding what drives them to the behavior.
- The (broad) solution: identify the deeper hunger that drives each addiction and try to find a way to satisfy it by a meaningful and fulfilling activity.
The bad:
- If you buy a book called "The Soft Addiction Solution", you probably have a good idea what soft addictions are and that you have them. The book, however, spends several chapters trying to get you to "discover" that you have soft addictions and how much time (and/or money) they are costing you.
- Despite its name, the book offers few concrete solutions. In fact, a more apt title would be "The Soft Addiction Problem". Once you understand the concept that soft addictions arise from a vague deeper yearning for something meaningful, you are pretty much on your own to discover what that yearning is in your particular case, and how to satisfy it better. The author does give some examples, but many of them are rather vague and corny (for example, possible yearnings could be "to be seen", "to matter", "to love and be loved"). Ultimately, you will be asked to reflect and journal (if you like that sort of thing) to figure out what your particular "spiritual hungers" are, and what activities will help you to fulfill those.
The ugly:
- The writing style is half rambling and half self-promotion. The author has, for marketing purposes no doubt, coined a few phrases such as "soft addiction", "the One Decision", and "living a life of MORE" (yes, in caps), which she relentlessly inserts into the text in a way that is far from subtle. The book is already written in a redundant and verbose style, and the constant repetition of MORE, One Decision, the softly addicted life, etc. etc. multiple times on every page, makes reading pretty unpleasant. The author continuously mentions her successful self-help business and her workshops at the eponymous Wright institute. We understand that marketing is part of staying afloat in the self-help publishing world, and if it were done a bit more skillfully, it might have passed, but unfortunately it's about as in-your-face as can be.
Final note:
In a sense, this book is really two books back-to-back: the expository-style "The Soft Addiction Solution", and the reflection exercise book "The Soft Addiction Solution Workbook" in the back. They are largely redundant, and the second one especially seems to be taken straight from one of her workshops, where the participants might still need to be led down the path of discovering that soft addictions exist, are in their lives, and are bad. However, if you enjoy sort of guided journaling activities, you might like this part more than the first section.
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17 of 18 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The real deal, August 31, 2007
This review is from: The Soft Addiction Solution (Paperback)
Judith Wright has such a forgiving and refreshing approach to bad habits. The way she talks about "soft addictions" makes me feel so much self acceptance and understanding for myself and why I do the things I do. Instead of hating and indicting myself, I feel compassion and insight. I realize I am looking for something more meaningful and nourishing and that I can decide to do something different and have a completely different experience. Judith's "math of more" is a brilliant way to think about making incremental positive changes that add up over time. Instead of trying to quit something cold turkey, Wright recommends identifying what I am really emotionally hungry for and finding a better way to really satisfy that hunger. The other night, I was on a business trip and was starting to surf the channels on the TV, killing time and staying up too late. I caught myself and realized that I was searching kind of aimlessly for something that would interest me, excite me or somehow make me feel connected with something. I realized that I was longing for personal contact, so I turned off the TV, called my wife, talked to her for a few minutes and went to bed. I felt a little happier and slept better and longer. This seemed like a really small thing, but made me feel much better the next day. Wright combines her compassionate approach to life with a logical and very effective set of methods for making lasting positive change. This is the real deal - not just good ideas, but very practical, useful stuff, grounded in real life experience.
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