Customer Reviews

Solo-Ops: A Survival Guide for Military Wives

5 star:		(17)
4 star:		(4)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(26)

 

 

For anyone interested in reading a book about the military, I recommend going elsewhere. This book is full of factual errors, author impressions, and short-sighted pessimism that are, at best, misleading.

My wife picked up this book AT THE BASE LIBRARY (how sad). After reading it for about 20 minutes, she said to me "This is horrible!" Being a faster reader than her, I picked it up and tried to skim through it. The first thing that struck me was the unnecessarily aggressive writing style of the author...then I got past the first paragraph and realized it was much worse.

Ms. Martin was a military brat (as was I), but unless she dealt with the finance office, planned moves, or any other major facet of military life, that truly has little bearing on how to live life as a military wife. I have been in for less than 3 years and already have 3 tours in the Middle East, 2 formal training assignments, and am about to go to pilot training. I say this not to denigrate Ms. Martin, but to show I have a little more credibility than Ms. Martin when it comes to the descriptions of the military she depicts.

I think the biggest mistake in this book are her "truths." All of these "truths" are misleading/false and are only backed up by bitterness, a limited 4 year experience, and very little factual information. While I am sure that some people might FEEL the same as Ms. Martin, she doesn't seem to present any facts, only inuendo and opinion. While I can tear apart all of her "truths", I will focus on only three.

"Truth #1: The recruiter lied to you"

Most recruiters are honest. There are many who stretch the truth, but most will give you a fair shake. In addition, if you don't get it in writing and you sign without reading the fine print, sorry, but just like a new car, YOU are stuck with it under the conditions by which you signed. My advice, read the fine print and have a lawyer present if you are being promised ANYTHING.

"Truth #4: The US Constitution does not apply to your husband
...They can do whatever they want because your husband belongs to them...the military treats everyone the same: as if they are disposable and don't matter
"

This is patently absurd. The military is a government agency and responds as such, but it does not mean that you have no rights. You can participate in election campaigns, you have freedom of speech (but cannot divulge classified info), you can worship how you please, you can keep and bear arms (when not on a controlled federal installation such as a base or airport), you can vote on whom you please, etc. ad nauseum.
Just because you don't like
it and your husband is busy, doens't mean he doesn't have rights. The government does not OWN you. You are NOT a slave. They cannot force you to do a LOT of things. However, you took an oath to obey the orders of those appointed over you. If you didn't believe it, you shouldn't have said it and agreed to it.

"Truth #6: The military reserves the right not to pay you."

You may make a mistake in paperwork or commit a felony, but when your company docks your pay, it may suck, but it is not "not paying" you. If commited of a felony in ANY court, they can garnish your wages to recoup losses. If anyone in the military docks you enough pay to bankrupt you, they will be wasting valuable manpower. It was not your money to begin with; keep track of your finances, take your time filling out your paperwork (don't be afraid to ask questions), and you won't have these kinds of financial problems.

Other "truths" with problems

"11. You will not "pick" your duty station" (you can give them a list, but as long as it is on that list, you can get it. 97% get something on your list. Sorry, not everyone spends 4 years in Hawaii. That's life.)

"13. You are moving to the ghetto." (Rarely do you have to live on base. It may not fit your budget well, and you may have to pay more, but you choose where you live in your community, not the military. Make your own choice and priorities)

"15. There is no such thing as a good duty station or assignment." Every assignment has plusses and minuses. Making the most of what you have is what makes it good. Focusing on the negatives ensures you will not have a good time at your assignment.

"16. Ceremony is more important than life itself" plan ahead and this usually isn't an issue. If your wife is giving birth, you won't be at some stupid formation for a promotion ceremony.

In short, this is a horrible, misleading book that is best used as an expensive piece of kindling. 1 star is the lowest rating I could give it. It should be in the negative range.

...from a self-published book. Plowing through the poor punctuation, grammar and non-existent editing rewards you with a glimpse into one sad woman's life. Its amusement value is about one dollar at a garage sale.

Try Today's Military Wife by Lydia Sloan Cline if you're looking for actual information about military life.

If you want a sarcastic, (read: mean spirited) look behind the scenes of a jaded military wife that seems to dislike the military, then look no further, for you have found the motherlode.

The pessimistic tone of this book is very demoralizing, and I can only hope it isn't being sold in your PX, for surely it would send even the toughest of military wives running for the nearest divorce lawyer.

Hilary Martin does the impossible with this book, with her sad attempts at humor dragging the tone of the book even further down into the depths of cranky regret.

I am ashamed of this book, and only hope that the outlooks of other mil. wives are more upbeat.

Don't buy it. I promise you will regret it.

Refunds should be offered on this to every unsuspecting customer that had the utter misfortune to actually pay for it.

(note: I only gave it one star because the Amazon system demands a rating and doesn't have a "negative star rating")

The only Good reviews came from the Author's "Friends" from her little website, I know this because I use to be a member there. This book is nothing more than Hilary whining! She does not care about Us Military wives. She is in this for the Money, she is also turning her "support" board into a Paid only board because it is a "hobby" of hers and is tired of paying out of her pocket for "Our" Socializing Needs. Do not support someone who does NOT support Us. Hilary's book offers No useful information at all. If your looking for a Good Book, try Married To the Military.

I read the first three chapters in this book before I decided to buy it from the store. Thank God I did. I am a new Air Force officer's wife and this book had NOTHING to do with me or my situation. It scared the crap out of me to hear that I would no longer get to have any form of entertainment, learn how to "spin straw into gold", and kiss cable TV goodbye. This author could make someone want to run screaming away from military life. And I found it insulting about marrying a military man for the benefits, not to mention the whole "give it up, your man will leave for deployment for a year and you'd better just get used to it."
This book has little to nothing to offer any wife or future wife of an officer nor will it aid anyone marrying into the Air Force. As the author states, she knows nothing about the Air Force except we all play golf and live in Myrtle Beach. Sheesh.

After Reading the review below, I decided to check out this Support Site. I in fact did see that it will be a Paid board as of the new year. In her announcement to the site, she was very rude and stated that it only cost a "measly" 24 Dollars a year.I'm sure that makes those wives of lower ranking husbands feel great reading that, if they cant in fact afford those measly $24 dollars from their small paycheck. I was willing to give miss Hilary a chance but after seeing all the information, I have to say that It appears she is only here to make money off of us.
Seriously like many others have stated, this book is simply the diary of a sad jaded girl. This Book would scare anyone off. With the bad attitude Hilary displays it's no wonder she has had these experiences. The book offers no real useful information, if you are new to the Military Life please don't believe the lies in this book. There are many useful books out there, Beware of this one.
Also getting discharged from Bootcamp hardly qualifies as Military experience.
This Book does not even deserve 1 Star, like stated by the reviewer below me, DO NOT SUPPORT SOMEONE WHO DOES NOT SUPPORT US!

Nothing pains me more than women who write on the military wife's lifestyle with little or no military experience. What happens is books that have no merit or meaning to their subject. But I guess this is what happens when your husband is discharged and you were only "IN" the military for a year. What can one learn about the military wife lifestyle in a year? The book/author says:
"The government does not want to pay for his medical expenses or his college; they just want another mindless drone to follow orders and die for them, if necessary."
Hmm? Something tells me the author if this quote didn't learn much. Save your time, save your money. How someone can feel good conning money out of the sister hood of new military wives when they themselves are no longer even in a service and in return give the reader negative fluff for $20+ is beyond me. I suggest self publishing about a more general topic next time that one is more familiar with such as cats or gold fish etc...

There is not much I can say that the other reviewers did'nt already say. Please don't waste your money, The Military Life is NOT nearly as bad as the Writer lets on. Yes, you run into some problems along the way but that comes with anything not just Military Life. It's all about How you deal with what you are given.

I've been doing research for a work-related project on military families for a few years and haven't come across this book until recently. I picked it up and thumbed through it and was immediately put off by the tone and the haphazard organization. I decided that I would read it cover to cover, however, because it is one of only a few such books on the market. I couldn't finish it. I've been a military wife for ten years and I have heard some whining, most of it justified. I've never known anyone who could fill a whole book with their whining and ranting and raving, though. The situations that Ms. Martin describes are certainly not universal as in my ten years as a military wife I have never encountered most of those described in the book. It is also my experience that most people are not as negative as the author and are not nearly as mean-spirited. I despise the condescending, know-it-all tone she used throughout the book and the fact that she spoke as the voice of ALL experience military wives. Baloney. It was crystal clear to me that she hadn't been a military wife very long.

Content aside, the book is self-published and therefore essentially unedited. No quality control was exercised to save the reader from typos, comma splices, and just plain inexcusably bad grammar.

If you want to read one very whiny person's view on military life, then this is the book for you. Otherwise, don't waste your money or the time it will take you to lift this book off the library shelf.

I hope she wasn't paid much for this book. I have read several books on the military way of life, and I have to say this was the most rude and typical polyester-patty military wife opinion and outlook. Although she "claims" to be a "professional" and employed as a pharmacy technician, her entire book paints her as a military wife that EVERYONE has heard about. Yes, those that give the good ones a bad name. This entire book is filled with negativity, and quite a large portion of it I have found to be untrue. Perhaps with her negative attitude these were in fact her experiences, but a polite person could never have so many bad encounters. I wish I had never wasted my money on this book, or the time to read it. I could have been doing something much more enlightening like watching the grass grow!!! Honestly, there are very few true instances in this book. To get a better perspective from an OPEN MIND and a military spouse, buy Married to the Military.