Speaking of Boys: Answers to the Most-Asked Questions About Raising Sons [Paperback]

Michael Thompson Ph.D. (Author), Teresa Barker (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: August 1, 2000

My eight-year-old son is the only boy in his class who doesn't have a Gameboy. I don't want him to be ostracized for not having one, but I worry that it's addictive. What do you think?

Our two sons are eleven and fourteen, and they are fiercely competitive. The tension around our house is awful. How can we help them get along better?

We've worked very hard to keep our ten-year-old son in touch with his feelings. Sometimes it seems as if we've put him at a disadvantage, surrounded by tougher boys who can be pretty cruel with teasing. How can we help him protect himself when other boys start to tease?

With his bestselling book Raising Cain, Michael Thompson, Ph.D., at last broke the silence surrounding the emotional life of boys and spearheaded an important national debate. His warmth and humor quickly made him a popular and respected international speaker and consultant. Now he directs his authority, insight, and eloquence to answering your questions about raising a son. With candid questions and thoughtful, detailed responses, Speaking of Boys covers hot-button topics such as peer pressure, ADHD/ADD, and body image as well as traditional issues such as friendship, divorce, and college and career development. This perceptive, informative, and passionate book will leave you not only with useful, practical advice but also with the comforting knowledge that other parents share the same concerns you do when it comes to raising our boys into well-adjusted, responsible men.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Preeminent child psychologist, Michael Thompson is renowned for his efforts to educate and assist parents with sons. First with Raising Cain (his response to Mary Pipher's Reviving Ophelia ) and now with Speaking of Boys, Thompson encourages parents to help their sons develop the emotional intelligence necessary to succeed. The book seeks to answer parents' questions concerning the complexities of raising a boy in today's society. Every chapter introduces questions from parents on issues like puberty, underage drinking, and increased violence in schools, and in every instance the author responds with insightful and knowledgeable advice. Chapters entitled "Speaking of Social Anger and Aggression" and "Feelings and Communication--Is Our Sensitive Boy a Sitting Duck for Bullies?" are particularly in tune with the apprehension parents feel when sending their sensitive sons off for another grueling day at school.

The key to raising a healthy son, says Thompson, is to help your boy attain an emotional intelligence that will allow him to cope with difficult and threatening situations. To accomplish this, parents need to nurture compassion in their sons and try to avoid allowing them to become desensitized by the teasing and pressure of others. Respecting your son's need to appear strong at times and offering him a sense of safety when discussing emotionally revealing subjects are two ways Thompson encourages parents to nurture their son's emotional development. As anyone who is raising a boy knows, it's a job that is never quite finished, and with this book, Thompson offers parents an invaluable tool, regardless of their son's age. --Dal Asher

From the Inside Flap

My eight-year-old son is the only boy in his class who doesn't have a Gameboy. I don't want him to be ostracized for not having one, but I worry that it's addictive. What do you think?

Our two sons are eleven and fourteen, and they are fiercely competitive. The tension around our house is awful. How can we help them get along better?

We've worked very hard to keep our ten-year-old son in touch with his feelings. Sometimes it seems as if we've put him at a disadvantage, surrounded by tougher boys who can be pretty cruel with teasing. How can we help him protect himself when other boys start to tease?

With his bestselling book Raising Cain, Michael Thompson, Ph.D., at last broke the silence surrounding the emotional life of boys and spearheaded an important national debate. His warmth and humor quickly made him a popular and respected international speaker and consultant. Now he directs his authority, insight, and eloquence to answering your questions about raising a son. With candid questions and thoughtful, detailed responses, Speaking of Boys covers hot-button topics such as peer pressure, ADHD/ADD, and body image as well as traditional issues such as friendship, divorce, and college and career development. This perceptive, informative, and passionate book will leave you not only with useful, practical advice but also with the comforting knowledge that other parents share the same concerns you do when it comes to raising our boys into well-adjusted, responsible men.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 352 pages
• Publisher: Ballantine Books; 1 edition (August 1, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0345441486
• ISBN-13: 978-0345441485
• Product Dimensions: 5.4 x 0.7 x 8.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #165,976 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

83 of 84 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This book really does answer your questions about boys, August 1, 2000

By 

Lawrence J. Cohen (Brookline, MA United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Speaking of Boys: Answers to the Most-Asked Questions About Raising Sons (Paperback)

Speaking of Boys is delightful to read, by turns funny, poignant, insightful, and informative. Michael Thompson clearly understands boys, but even more importantly, he understands the worries and concerns that parents and educators and therapists have about boys. If you enjoyed Raising Cain, as I did, you will like this book even more, because it is written in such an engaging style. I found myself starting by flipping around to the questions I specifically wanted to know about, and then just decided to read the whole thing, since all the answers were so fun and informative and at times, moving. If you haven't read Michael Thompson's other book on boys, then I'd suggest starting with this one, and moving on to raising Cain if you want more background and theory and in-depth clinical cases.

50 of 51 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars I was reminded what it was like to be 12 and confused., November 21, 2000

By 

Glenn Fratto (Arlington, MA United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Speaking of Boys: Answers to the Most-Asked Questions About Raising Sons (Paperback)

I buy more books than I find time to read them. Occasionally I come across a book that grabs my attention, hooks me in, and refuses to let me put it down. Such is the case in regard to "Speaking of Boys". I was spending time in the book section of a local Target store while my ll and 12 year-old boys were checking out toys and video games. The book's cover photo grabbed my attention. Flipping through the book and its questions, I found the presentation attractive, bought it, and began reading it during subway rides to and from work. I came to understand a lot of issues that I never fully comprehended as a twelve year old. I was surprised by some of the "facts" of teenage boys, such as how they view sex, why they feel a need to fight authority while needing hugs, when "wet dreams" begin and how to explain the phenomenon, etc. I have highly recommended the book to many. It's easy to digest, accessible to just about anyone, and oftentimes explains difficult issues with a touch of humor. Check it out!

34 of 34 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Answers Questions We (Especially Dads) Should Be Asking!, October 11, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Speaking of Boys: Answers to the Most-Asked Questions About Raising Sons (Paperback)

This is a wonderfully engaging book. I usually struggle through the initial chapters (only) of the traditional "expert advice on child rearing" books which my wife is always plowing through. Thankfully, I had no such problem here. In fact, for once I was excitedly reading portions of the book to her. This book deals with everything from war toys to pre-teen sex to parents just letting go, with many stops along the way. Highly recommended for those who want answers to everyday boy problems, especially before we make them into bigger teenager problems. I even put down my novels and biographies for this one! It will make you laugh ... and cry.