Speaking the Truth in Love: How To Be an Assertive Christian [Paperback]

Ruth N. Koch (Author), Kenneth C. Haugk (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 1992

This book talks about how to balance being loving and supportive while not being fearful of having biblical principles. It also offers tips on how to be more assertive without being needlessly insensitive or mousy.

Product Details

• Paperback: 199 pages
• Publisher: Stephen Ministries; 1st edition (September 1992)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0963383116
• ISBN-13: 978-0963383112
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.5 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #52,453 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

21 of 22 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Incredibly practical tool for interpersonal communication, January 18, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Speaking the Truth in Love: How To Be an Assertive Christian (Paperback)

Before reading this book, I suffered from a sort of horror of non-fiction. However, Speaking The Truth in Love is non-threatening, practical, and attainable. The principles shared are deep, loving, and in no way narrow. Given a fair chance, they can be life changing. Encouragement to true assertiveness that respects others as well as yourself is gently but firmly emphasized. The Christian community especially would do well to assimilate its principles into classes, small groups, and requested reading for all potential church leaders. This is a powerful book that deserves a much wider audience than it has yet reached. It is worth every penny I spent and more!

11 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Wow, what a lesson to learn!, July 16, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: Speaking the Truth in Love: How To Be an Assertive Christian (Paperback)

I never really knew I could be assertive. Thanks to this book, I am now lovingly assertive. This book focuses on teaching you to be Christ-like in your assertiveness. It's a must read for anyone who wants to be more Christ-like!!

8 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Easy-to-read introduction to Assertive living, February 20, 2008

By 

Matthew Gunia (Justice, Illinois) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Speaking the Truth in Love: How To Be an Assertive Christian (Paperback)

Ruth Koch is a counselor, social worker, and educator; Ken Haugk is a pastor and the founder of Stephen Ministries (an organization that exists to equip church members in basic counseling and listening skills in order to be of service during others' difficult times). "Speaking the Truth in Love" is one book in the training curriculum and focuses on how one can grow to be more assertive.

Assertiveness can be defined as "moving toward one's self as you move toward another person." This is to be contrasted with Passiveness (in which a person decides not to reveal his true feelings and ends up experiencing guilt and frustration...thus working against himself) and Aggressiveness (in which a person attacks and thus works against another person). The authors explain why Assertiveness is the best of these three options, hold up Jesus as the ultimate example of Assertiveness, and give practical advice for becoming more Assertive. The authors liberally use anecdotes and examples to illustrate their points, making this book an easy read. However, although the information is laid out simply, the material itself is certainly not simplistic. Kock and Haugk know their subject matter well, they have a good understanding of Christian theology, and they are prove able to teach the material in an understandable and engaging way.

Although this book is intended for Christians going through Stephen Ministry training, you don't need to be either a Stephen Minister or a Christian to benefit from "Speaking the Truth in Love." I, personally, am not going through the Stephen Ministry program and found the book highly beneficial; Jesus is treated more as a historical figure to emulate rather than True God and True Man. It should also be mentioned that, while other similar books tend to assume the reader is Passive, this book strikes a balance between addressing a Passive reader and an Aggressive reader.

In all, "Speaking the Truth" is highly recommended. It serves as a good introduction to interpersonal communication, conflict resolution, leadership, and self-differentiation.