Spiritual Partnership: The Journey to Authentic Power [Hardcover]

Gary Zukav (Author)

Book Description

Release date: April 27, 2010

In his first major book since the legendary bestseller The Seat of the Soul, Gary Zukav reveals a revolutionary new path for spiritual growth. What began with an introduction to a major paradigm shift in The Dancing Wu Li Masters turned into a discussion of aligning our personalities with our soul in The Seat of the Soul; finally, in Spiritual Partnership, Zukav guides the reader on this practical path to authentic power.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Amazon Exclusive: A Personal Note from Gary Zukav

I wrote Spiritual Partnership: The Journey to Authentic Power to try to get out of my own cage. I wanted, and needed, to connect with people, not just reach them, but really connect for my own well being and hopefully for theirs as well.

I have learned that the difficult times in my life are not because of other people, they are because of me. They occur because of parts of my personality that are painful to experience. When I am with someone who brings them up in me, that is a painful time, but I know that it is not about the other person when I feel angry or impatient or irritable. It is about me, and so I am intent to use my experiences with others to learn about me so that I can change me because I am really tired of trying to change other people. And not only am I tired of it, I don't want to. It doesn’t feel good. I know deep in me that it is a wrong path for me to take, and I feel that it is a painful path for anyone to take.

Spiritual partnership is a partnership with another person or other people who feel the same way. It is a partnership between equals for the purpose of spiritual growth. So when my spiritual partners and I have difficult interactions, we do not point fingers at each other, we try our best to respond instead of react, and to support one another in doing that also. Spiritual partnership is a new kind of relationship, a different kind of relationship. We do more than talk about hair styles, life styles, car styles, children, and work. We do all those things too but those conversations take on a different meaning. While I am having them, I am noticing what I am feeling. I'm noticing if anything gets triggered in me and if it does, I pay attention to it, especially if I am becoming upset because those are the experiences that keep me from loving. They keep me apart from people.

For a long time I thought that if I could change people enough, and get some that were just right around me, it would be easy to be loving, but it doesn't work like that because everybody has parts of her or his personality that are loving and also parts that are not loving. I would say the not-loving parts are the frightened parts of the personality, the parts that are angry, jealous, vengeful, feel superior, feel inferior, etc. And when these parts become active, and this always happens sooner or later, that's when the learning potential begins. Of course, it also begins when the loving parts come out, the parts that are grateful, patient, appreciative, content, etc. Being a spiritual partner means really wanting to support people because you see when they are in pain how they might learn from their pain, too, if they're open. If they’re open.

My focus is on changing myself because I know that other people can’t change me, but I also know that each of my spiritual partners wants to change himself or herself, too. He wants to find and challenge the painful, destructive parts of his personality and cultivate the constructive, blissful parts of his personality, and so I assist him whenever I think I see that they might be active. I don';t just say "This is what is happening in you, and this is what you ought to do." I ask her if she is open to looking at something that I think I might be seeing. For example, some parts of my personality that I have become very familiar with over years feel superior, entitled, impatient, and don't really care about the needs of others, but not everybody is like that. One of my spiritual partners feels a need to please other people when a frightened part of her personality is active; to see them smile or value her because of what she can do or give. So when I see that part come out in her behaviors and thoughts and attitudes, if she is open I will help her see them. And there are specific ways, very helpful ways that we can assist one another. This book gives them to you.

Once I started this book I kept writing because it felt so good. I love it when creativity begins to flow and I can think of a better way to express something--a story, or a metaphor, or a process. I love that experience of sharing. The more I stretched myself to think, "How can I say this in a way that is not by rote? How can I not take refuge in what I know how to say but really communicate in an even more meaningful way?" the deeper my understanding of spiritual partnership became and the stronger my ability to share it. One idea lead to another, one chapter lead to another, and after a few chapters I began to see an outline for the book, and that outline became WHY, WHAT, HOW, and WHO. That';s how this book unfolded.

There is a saying that people teach what they really need to learn. Doing this in a heart-felt way has worked well for me. I can tell that I am becoming more able to connect with people because to my surprise I have become interested in them. Let me put it this way, I am aware now, much more aware of how important people are to me than I have been in the past. I like hearing their stories. I like hearing what is happening in their lives. For example, Linda Francis, the spiritual partner I live with, and I met a couple on a plane and found them to be wonderful. He told me that he has pancreatic cancer and that he and his wife were going on a cruise to Mexico. When he learned that his illness was terminal, he realized that he could spend his last days in a hospital, but that didn't sound inviting to him. Or he could spend them really living his life, and that invited him. That is what he is doing. What I really like about him is his aliveness, his interest, his interest in me and his excitement for what I am doing. He is as grounded as he is delightful and vibrant. He said, "I am a little afraid of what it will be like to die. I am not sure about that. I know I am going to get sick. I have done my homework on pancreatic cancer. It is an ugly way to die, but I feel so alive and so grateful for every moment." In the little time we were together, I learned about myself as well as about him, but mostly I enjoyed myself and I enjoyed him, and I feel that he enjoyed himself and he enjoyed me.

So those are the kind of experiences that are coming into my life now. And I also know that when it comes to spirituality, I am not special. If I can create authentic power and spiritual partnerships, you can. If I can make the journey from an angry, drug-using, sex-addicted, motorcycle-riding, angry--did I mention angry?--young man to someone who is now enjoying becoming an elder, anyone can. As I began to open my heart up many wonderful role models came into my life over the years, men and women who have opened their hearts or are opening them, and they are still coming. Perhaps I can be one of those role models for you, and you can be one for someone else. We are all opening our hearts, but it is not a matter of opening your heart and, there, that's a done deal. It is a matter of continuing to open your heart moment by moment. This book is about that, and how to do it.

Love,

Gary Zukav

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From the Back Cover

This book is about our new relationships. A new and surprising world is emerging that requires each of us to explore the sources of our love and cultivate them and the inner sources of all that prevents us from loving (our fears) and heal them. Our evolution has taken a new path, and our relationships are changing in unexpected and dramatic ways.

We are evolving beyond the limits of our five senses and encountering more expanded experiences of ourselves and our world than were previously possible. Where once our perception was confined to what we see, hear, taste, touch, and smell, we are now increasingly able to access data that these senses cannot detect. This expanded perception is forever altering our experiences of ourselves, our world, and our relationships.

Our evolution now presents us at each moment with a profound choice: we can pretend that our lives and the world are not changing and continue to relate to one another as before, or we can use our relationships to transform ourselves into authentically powerful, loving individuals.

In Spiritual Partnership, bestselling author Gary Zukav reveals a profound new relationship dynamic that enables us to reach our full potential and create authentic power—the fulfilling and joyful life that is calling to us all. Spiritual partnerships are not only for couples in marriage; they can be created anywhere two or more individuals decide to engage as equals for the purpose of spiritual development.

Filled with poignant examples and practical guidance, including specific guidelines, Spiritual Partnership empowers and enables us to explore our emotions, our intentions, our choices, and our intuition and to use them to create profound spiritual growth. The world is changing around us and within us, and Spiritual Partnership is the road map to that change.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 304 pages
• Publisher: HarperOne; 1 edition (April 27, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0061458503
• ISBN-13: 978-0061458507
• Product Dimensions: 1 x 6.3 x 9.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (54 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #108,610 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

GARY ZUKAV is the author of The Dancing Wu Li Masters: An Overview of the New Physics, winner of The American Book Award for Science; The Seat of the Soul, the celebrated #1 New York Times bestseller; Soul Stories, also a New York Times bestseller; and many others. His books have sold millions of copies and are published in twenty-four languages. He is a graduate of Harvard University and a former U.S. Army Special Forces (Green Beret) officer with Vietnam service. He lives in Oregon with his spiritual partner, Linda Francis.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

33 of 33 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars A consciousness-expanding look at how we relate to others and transform ourselves May 19, 2010

By Jed Shlackman VINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)

Zukav, the author acclaimed for books such as The Dancing Wu Li Masters and The Seat of The Soul, brings us a paradigm-shifting book about relationships. This book is not just about intimate partner relationships, but about principles that apply to all relationships. It examines how humanity appears to be facing a shift from 5-sensory perception to multi-sensory perception (perception beyond the physical senses). According to Zukav, this shift provides an opportunity for us to base our relationships on developing spiritually - supporting one another's spiritual growth and building internal power rather than seeking external power.

In this conceptualization, Zukav discusses how fear-based aspects of ourselves constantly seek external power to pursue an illusion of security. The love-fear dichotomy is seen at the heart of this challenge. Zukav points out how all the institutions of our existing society are geared toward pursuit of external power (that includes traditional ideas of marriage) - something which will theoretically fall away as humanity evolves in the next couple of generations.

This book presents clear ideas and guidelines for building spiritual partnerships - which involves facing fears, building self-awareness, letting go of judgments, having integrity, and having compassion for oneself and others. The book is excellent in offering an outline of the hows and whys of spiritual partnerships. Zukav has a smooth, engaging style of writing that will draw in readers to embrace what he is teaching. These teachings will definitely help foster healthier relationships and spiritual development.

My own reservation about some portions of this book (the reason I'm not giving it a full five stars) centers around Zukav's vision of humanity's transformation in the coming decades. Humanity has always had multi-sensory ability - in ancient eras (and even now in some indegenous cultures) people were actually more tuned in to their non-physical sensory awareness. Zukav implies that there's occuring now a rapid shift into a reality on Earth where everyone will be regularly tuned into ESP on a constant basis. Frankly, that seems highly questionable - and most people don't appear close to being spiritually mature enough to handle that expansion of sensory awareness. This book is well suited to those aligning with their soul/higher self and pursuing spiritual development - but it doesn't seem that humanity as a whole is making this shift that Zukav describes - a segment of the population who are likely to be interested in this type of book are embracing such a shift, yet the masses are to a great extent asleep to their spiritual selves. The future that Zukav predicts is a potential reality, but not one that appears immanent. I applaud him for showing us what's possible, though I think credibility is diminished when a future is foretold as if it's certain.

86 of 94 people found the following review helpful

3.0 out of 5 stars Important Ideas Unfortunately Buried Under Endless Analogies April 5, 2010

By bunnyrabbit4 VINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)

Gary Zukav's new book introduces the concept that relationships are mostly about you and your fears. He divides the relationship world into two types of people. The first is what he calls, Five Sensory people. They look for the causes of suffering outside of themselves, "in their failed relationships, illnesses, betrayals and bad luck." The second type which he says we all have to become at some point is the Multi-sensory. They are pursuing what he calls authentic power which is defined as power over themselves and their many moods and emotions. They are looking to find the roots of their needs and emotions rather than blaming their partner, life or circumstance for not meeting them. They also look at their defenses, which can take the form of feelings of superiority, righteousness and even inferiority. They consciously decide how to respond in any give situation.

According to Zukav, when spiritual partners meet in the Multi-sensory context, they value honesty, self analysis and mutual exploration even when this sharing might cause conflict or even separation. He says that most people try to find stasis in a relationship and accept limitations and compromises in order to preserve security. They project needs onto others and then give them the power to make them feel better instead of fully understanding or growing beyond the need itself.

Zukav's multi-sensory person is someone who assumes personal responsibility for meeting most of their own needs, thus making a partnership less binding. The partner is no longer seen as the all important source of our happiness and security. Here the loving environment is sustained to support personal growth. A sick relationship is a one in which the people involved are not completely honest with each other, even though it may outlive one in which both partners honesty results in separation.

People looking to "solve" relationship issues leading to some form of "happy ever after" will not find solutions here. However, Zukav makes the point that our ever increasing intuition makes this new type of relationship not only necessary but inevitable, because we can no longer hide our desires and discontent from each other as we once did and our power to manifest intentions seems to be growing as well. This makes it even more important that we understand our intentions within a relationship. The book goes on to give tips about how to monitor our intentions which he points out are often very unclear in relationships. It includes discussions that you have heard before if you have any books on manifesting.

I agree with his basic ideas, so why only three stars? Reading this book was painful because of the endless analogies, overstatements, personal anecdotes and constant repetition. I literally had to force myself to wade through it underlining the things I wanted to remember in red so I wouldn't lose them completely amidst the filler. Zukav could have covered this material in a book half this size and really gotten his point across. Instead he hammers simple ideas, often creating chapter long analogies to illustrate concepts best covered in a paragraph. He then goes back and dedicates another chapter to summarizing what he just covered. He also writes extensively about his own relationship, using it in numerous examples. This can be a pitfall for any writer because we can never be sure that the audience is as interested in a topic of personal concern as we are.

The book also fails to take an adequate look at the downside of our emerging intuitive powers, assuming instead that two people on the path will find each other and begin this work with positive intentions. What if your partner's intentions are selfish and mean spirited and you just don't realize it? Sharing a relationship with someone that is deeply intuitive means the other person always knows what you are thinking. It does not mean that your spiritual understanding and expression are equal. True equality of any kind in a relationship is very hard to come by. It is tempting to think that enhancing someones intuitive ability to understand another person increases their goodness. Intuition can be used for good or ill. Perhaps that is why these intuitive powers have not been given to the masses until this point in our human history.

The copy I've been given to review is an uncorrected proof. I hope he gives some consideration to downsizing this book before it hits the press. He has some great ideas.

Update: The finished book is listed at 304 pages. The version I had included a 27 page prologue and introduction and 259 pages of content. So this version is even longer than one I found to be over-run with filler.

16 of 18 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Fear and Love April 25, 2010

By Steve Burns TOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)

This book is about a new kind or relationship, it goes beyond the old roles in marriage of a provider and homemaker, it is more than friendship, it is even more valuable than traditional family relationships. A Spiritual partnership is between equals to accomplish spiritual growth. It serves a different purpose of all the traditional forms of relationships. The partners are together in order to help one another grow spiritually instead of enhance their physical comfort and safety. Spiritual partnerships are relationships that more spiritually receptive people use to create authentic power with in themselves. Their goal is to share spiritual growth with each other. They allow each other to see the emotional armor they wear because of irritability, righteosuness, superiority, and inferiority that is caused because of inner fear, and remove it. They allow each other to lay down their weapons of anger, jealousy, and vengeance because of love. Spiritual partners are on a quest for authentic power that comes from with in as love over takes fear as the underlying motivation in their mutual lives. These relationships do not seek external power, they seek to change themselves. They trust one another enough to explore their fear and love together. They are brave enough to probe the depths of intimacy. Their path is one where they do not try to solve one anothers problems, encourage bad bahavior, or enable destructive behavior. They are their to ask the right questions, search for the underlying fear in their partner, listen with their heart, and love unconditionally. Spiritual partners realize that their problems are internal not external. Another marriage, more money, alcohol, drugs, sex, or a better job is not the solution to their problems. People that are driven by solely their five senses leave circumstances only to discover that the demons that plague their mind were waiting for them in their new circumstances. Multisensory people are evolving that are in touch with their soul, heart, and intuition. This book provides a map to join in this journey. This review does not begin to do justice to the deep spiritual insights that are found in this book. This book gives you the guidelines on how to create such a beautiful spiritual relationship. If you are ready for this message it could literally begin to change your life and relationships permanently.

"The more you explore your intentions the more you will see that no matter how many options you appear to have, you actually have only two-love and fear. Loving intentions create authentic power."

Perfect love casts out all fear.