Customer Reviews

Stealth Fighter

5 star:		(1)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(8)

 

 

As far as Ice T vehicles go this one is pretty good. Ice T gives a totally believable performance as a former rap artist desperately trying to parlay his past sucess in the music business into a career as a bad actor. His acting is probably improving though, but who can tell? Unfortunately Science cannot yet measure the miniscule improvement in his talent and Amazon does not provide me with the option of anything less than one star... All that aside, Ice T is not totally to blame for this movie's garbage-ness. The script is pretty weak and the supporting cast is not very supportive. Maybe I couldn't suspend my disbelief, but in certain scenes, like all the ones where people are being stealthy, they are not stealthy, they are clearly in plain view of the people they sneak up on. The Stealth Bomber featured in the film spends most of its time parked in a garage. And when it attacks targets it certainly doesn't "smart bomb" them...nor does it make any effort to go unseen. It actually attacks in broad daylight. I guess we are supposed to chalk that up to Ice T's lack of flight experience. Bottom line: if you name your movie "Stealth Fighter" then by definition it should have some stealth in it. Maybe its ironic. Maybe the quality of the movie is "stealthy" making it appear as if it is without quality. Bearing that in mind I give it no stars but it gets five stars--all in stealth mode.

Oh my God, I can't believe they actually released this movie onto video! ...I had the dreadful misfortune of actually watching this film....thank GOD it was on HBO (I actually thought it was an HBO made-for-tv movie)...anyways, this movie was SOOO bad, I'm surprised that the Air Force even allowed their aircraft to be photographed for this movie..seriously..there's no plot and horrendous acting, but what can you expect from a movie with the title "Stealth Fighter"? Besides that, the movie is bad almost to the point of being funny....like the ending, I won't ruin it or anything (wouldn't that be bad! )......just don't bend over to pick up your beer (probably #12 by that point in the movie) because you might miss the whole ending...it's over that quick! One example of why this movie stinks so bad: Ice-T WALKS onto an Airforce base...decides to meander over to a hanger, knocks down a couple of <good> guys that look like offensive-tackle-types...then just jumps into a Stealth fighter (that happens to have the keys in it, and is fully gassed up)...and flies away non-chalantly....and he doesn't even rap! Anyways, might be good if you're inebriated and need a good laugh....otherwise, avoid this like a port-a-potty at a Buffet concert...like my roommate says of this movie in the same voice as that guy from the Simpsons, "Worst.....movie......ever! "

AN AIR FORCE PILOT [ICE-T] FAKES HIS OWN DEATH ONLY TO RESURFACE AS THE PARTNER OF A DEADLY LATIN AMERICAN ARMS DEALER [ANDREW DIVOFF]. WHEN A STEALTH GETS STOLEN AND IT'S USED TO TARGET THE MILITARY, IT'S UP TO ONE MAN [COSTAS MANDYLOR] TO STOP HIM BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE. ONE THING THAT CAN'T BE DENIED IS THAT THIS MOVIE IS BORING. THE ACTION IS NOT WORTH WATCHING, THE SCRIPT IS DUMB, AND THE STORY JUST GETS TIRING AFTER A WHILE. ERNIE HUDSON'S ACTING TALENTS ARE ONCE AGAIN WASTED IN ANOTHER LOW-RENT DIRECT-TO-VIDEO FILM. IF YOU LIKE ICE-T AND WANNA SEE ONE OF HIS MORE RECENT FILMS, SAVE YOUR MONEY AND RENT OR BUY ''OUT KOLD''.

We have a competition to see who can find the worst movie. Then we watch it with a group of guys and call it "Men's Stupid Movie Night." This movie qualified, as do all of the movies by this director. It was pretty entertaining if viewed from that point of view. Bad dialogue, an incomprehensible plot, innappropriate and ultra cheesy sets, lousy "acting", stolen footage from other movies, no regard of military protocol, uniforms, weapons systems, and anything that resembles a real military situation. Since we invite our sons, we actually look for clean movies to mock, and this is full of gratuitous bad language, such as the scene where Ice T unloads a barrage of F-Bomb flak at the President of the United States. As Ice T states so succinctly, "What a wasthte!" (an attempt to spell Ice man's pronunciation). I could not agree more. But then again, that's what Stupid Movie Night is all about.

Ice T is a air force pilot turned evil doer for hire in this action "thriller". Apparently on US Air Bases, they don't lock anything and easily allow their stealth jets to be taken. Also, the guards that are supposedly looking out for people trying to break in to the base are completely surprised, when the exact thing they are supposed to be doing happens, and allow themselves to be shot. And where exactly did a man that feined his own death get at least 5 bank accounts all in different countries? Wouldn't it suffice just to have one Swiss bank account? Apparently not for Ice T. Of course in the conclusion he is ultimately spoiled by a wristwatch with no band, that can apparently counteract all the stealth features of his jet. I would recommend this movie, but it is terrible...

I wonder if it is legal to splice visual effect shots from different movies together and sell the result as a new movie? If it is, then anyone could make high intensity movies at home and sell them under their own home-made label.

If you're wondering why I pose this question, let me tell you the answer now and spare you the money you would waste by renting this excuse-for-a-movie. First of all the movie starts with a good minute and half of stunning visual effects right out of Paramount's "Flight of the Intruder". That's right, all that is different is that you see Ice T sitting in a room that's supposed to be the fairly cramped quarters of a cocpit. If you watch this action sequence with some cool explosions and everything else, stop the tape and pop in your own copy of "Flight of the Intruder", you'll see that absolutely nothing was changed. Later you have scenes taken from a movie called "The Interceptor" (from VIDMARK Entertainment, I think) which involves the stealing of a stealth fighter! Then the piracy becomes even more blatant when you see the satelite from MGM/UA's "Diamonds Are Forever", unfolding and then shooting a beam down to earth. I can't recognize which movie the submarine scenes were taken from but this Los Angeles class nuclear submarine's engine room looks a lot like the WWII diesel engined Tigerfish from Fox's "Down Periscope"! Later on you see an arms dealer's boat explode and by God, this explosion looks just like the one in "Blown Away" starring Jeff Bridges and Tommy Lee Jones. And to top everything off, the bad guy's mountain villa gets blown up in an explosion taken right out of Paramount's "Clear And Present Danger".

So what is the point of watching this movie at all? I don't know. It was a mistake and I urge you not to make the same mistake as I did. I always try to be fair in my reviews and point out one good thing for every negative comment. I mean, it is bad enough that some moviemakers don't respect their audience enough by trying to pass American F-4 Phantoms for Russian Migs, but when vissual effects from other movies are transplanted, spliced together, and sold as a new movie, what am I to say? Now compound this with a trite story and some bad acting and what you get is a cheap movie rip off, literally speaking! They may have wanted to include the huge tanker explosion from Fox's "Speed 2" to add some juice to this tired movie but it's not there. I wonder what held them back?

This movie is not worh the 49 cents it may soon be renting for. It was so boring that it put me to sleep after a half hour of watching other movies' speciall effects. And since it still wasn't over by the time I woke up, I ejected it from my VCR and didn't bother with the ending. I always watch the endings. But I guess this one had to take the prize after about 2000 films! Oh, and by the way, if I could give no stars to this movie I would have. Unfortunately, I would not be able to warn other potential victims of this film without giving it a star rating. But if you've read this far, then you can make a judgement on your own.

Picture the scene...

Saddam Hussein (apparently French judging by his accent) goes to Thailand to purchase a case of machine guns... personally. To celebrate cliching the deal the devout muslim pours a glass of vodka for his Thai warlord friend and swigs from the bottle himself uttering one of the classic lines of modern cinema... 'A toast!'. He then stumbles on to the veranda of the hut to be nuked by Ice-T in a sttthhtealth (sic) fighter. We laughed for hours! OK so the film is terrible but that one scene makes this a work of absolute genius!

Here is 'a toast' to the inspired direction and sparkling performance by 'Saddam' he diserves an Oscar!! Perhaps the CIA could replace the real Saddam with the star of this film. No one would be able to tell the difference!

Terrible is movie this a. Read that first sentence if you can. The movie is about as good as the grammar I used. It combined many bad actors from many bad movies to combine in a wonderful exercise in...[nothing]. The plot is just completely ridiculous and unorganized. I won't even get into it. If you want some specific details on how bad it is check out the review above me. I would recommend this movie to you, but it is terrible...

Better-than-average special affects can't save the fact this movie doesn't even try in some other areas.

Ice-T plays an ex-pilot turned rogue helping a cartel leader ransom world leaders with a powerful satellite system, and a powerful stealth plane. An old friend of his is chosen to lead a military unit to stop his old friend (gee, THAT plotline hasn't been used before).

The "Rangers" they send to stop Ice-T are some of the worst Rangers I've seen on screen. They looked more like Cuban soldiers, and I have to wonder if they just said, "Hey guys we're making a movie, come dressed in whatever military gear you got." I've never gone to Ranger school, but I seriously doubt they train a "Stand Out in the Open and Get Shot Doctrine."

And what the hell was with the Saddam Hussein clone? He barely served any purpose to the plot...except to appear and get blown up. A guy with a mustache, pork belly, and beret isn't going to draw laughter from the audience?

I have yet to see how Ice T keeps getting roles in movies. He is such a bad actor, and he has no screen presence. Yet he keeps cropping up in inane movies like this one. This time he's a traitorous pilot who fakes his own death so he can resurface working for some drug or munitions lord and steal a stealth fighter to accomplish assassinations for the criminal. He is tracked by his former co-pilot, a straight arrow guy whose marriage is floundering because he spends too much time at work? Come on, ladies..you marry a military man, you expect this. Having recently seen HOT SHOTS 1 & 2, this is the kind of movie those gems spoofed; this would have been better had it been a spoof. Aside from Ice T's stony performance, we get Wishmaster's Andrew Divoff with some kind of phony accent; Costas Mandylor huffing and puffing his way through his standard role; Erika Eleniak pouting in her few scenes as Costas' estranged wife; and funniest of all, Ghostbusters' Ernie Hudson as the President of the United States.
It's all tastelessly dull and routine, and I give it two stars only because I finished watching it.