Stepparenting Without Guilt [Paperback]

Maurine Doerken (Author)

Book Description

ISBN-10: 1577330544 | ISBN-13: 978-1577330547 | Publication Date: February 7, 2000

Stepparenting is becoming increasingly important as our society undergoes continuing marital evolution. Today, most Americans are part of a second family than a first. Approximately thirty-five million people now live in stepfamilies with thirteen hundred new ones forming each day.

Stepparenting Without Guilt is designed to give the new and seasoned stepparent an honest appraisal of what today's stepfamily looks like and how it behaves. It dispels the myth that stepfamilies behve like nuclear families, addresses many of the issues that adults and children in stepfamilies face, and outlines what it takes to make a lasting cohesive family unit.

Stepparenting Without Guilt introduces you to:

Different styles of Stepparenting (are you a "superstepparent," or a "rescuer," a "dictator" or "reluctant"?)

Different types of stepchild behavior (Is your stepchild at various times pushy, silent, critical, or a "pest"?)

Different stepfamily emotional minefields (guilt, anger, fear of abandonment, resentment, low self-esteem, grief and loss)

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

Twenty-five rules for Stepparenting Without Guilt are given.

Here are just a few:

1 - You cannot take away the pain of the past or pretend it's not real. Recognize and accept stepfamily problems for what they are and know that in most stepfamilies the best way to achieve genuine bonding is to work through the hard times.

4 - You don't have to love your stepchildren (or they you) - you do need to build trust and be fair.

10 - Accept what you can't change (especially with stepsiblings), and work from there.

14 - Realize that stepfamilies may generate a great deal of emotional reactivity because members can hurt in a lot of places.

17 - There is a point where your biological children come first - being firm and realistic about the needs of your own children will help you be a better stepparent as well.

25 - The greatest gift you can give your stepchild (or child) is permission to be happy in both homes.

About the Author

Maurine Doerken, a licensed Marriage, Family, and Child Counselor, holds a Master's Degree in Clinical Psychology and two teaching credentials. She worked as a teacher, both in the U.S. and England, for almost twenty years before becoming a family counselor.

Ms. Doerken experienced many of the issues covered in Stepparenting Without Guilt when she married her husband and became his daughter's (then three) stepmom. In addition to her stepdaughter, she and her husband have three children of their own. her frustrations, triumphs, and realizations are chronicled in each section of the book, giving it an honest, "I've been there and lived that" flavor.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 144 pages
• Publisher: Blue Dolphin Publishing (February 7, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1577330544
• ISBN-13: 978-1577330547
• Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.5 x 0.4 inches
• Shipping Weight: 2.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,736,523 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Great Guide To Deal With Your Stepfamily, June 18, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: Stepparenting Without Guilt (Paperback)

Stepparenting Without Guilt has really helped me to better understand the painful situations that come up in a stepfamilies and how to deal with them in a way that is constructive and loving rather than hostile and combative. Since the author is both a licensed therapist and a stepparent herself, I appreciated this book even more. Not only is there a lot of useful information, but also an emotional understanding about the difficulties of being in a stepfamily that only comes from personal experience.