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Stop Cruelty to Chickens and TV Viewers - Comedy Fiction Suitable For All - Paperback Paperback – March 31, 2007


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Choose Your Own Autobiography
Step right into Neil Patrick Harris's shoes in an exciting, interactive autobiography that places the reader squarely in the driver's seat. Learn more

Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Can Write Will Write (March 31, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0955488907
  • ISBN-13: 978-0955488900
  • Product Dimensions: 5.9 x 9.1 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 14.9 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #10,901,693 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

Full of observation humor that made me laugh at myself as much as at those in the story. The characters are well rounded, believable and all seem to be people I know! It was hard to put down and I can't wait to read the second in the series. --Blulu

From the Author

Over two thousand years ago the Romans came, saw and conquered Britain.
They stayed for a few hundred years, give or take, until rising Villa prices, the ferociousness of the local lions and the quality of home brewed wine convinced them to take all roads back to Rome.
No Romans remained. Britain, both sides of Hadrian's Wall, became a Roman-free zone.
Except....
There was one little town where the Roman bugle-song anthem of retreat, 'Legitus Quickitus', was not heard. One town where the Romans and the locals, ears full of soap, were so busy splashing around together they missed the thunder of the departing last night chariots of fire. And as there were no cabs due for another 15 hundred years - and that's if you believe the cab office - the town's Romans decided to stay.
The town grew, thriving on the naturally occurring spa waters, nurtured by the river Fons and hardened by the combination of original Brits and Roman bath lovers. The last bastion of the Roman Empire, it is now a mighty town
indeed.
The town's name? Spawater, home of the legendary Spawater Baths.
The Spawater Chronicles are the tales of its citizens, and how they take on the world and win.

More About the Author

Author Barry Tighe is not a Roman, though he has met a few, and
does not come from Spawater.
He discovered the ancient town by accident when he fell asleep on a train
from Paddington. Noting how people were paid in cash for painting
themselves silver and standing stock-still in the town centre, he decided
that such a career in Spawater amongst the Romans was far more interesting
than his previous life as an information technology instructor.
Accordingly he joined the Spawater Gladiators' supporters club, bought a toga and told the boss what he could do with his IT job.
And has been starving ever since.

Over two thousand years ago the Romans came, saw and conquered Britain.
They stayed for a few hundred years, give or take, until rising Villa prices, the ferociousness of the local lions and the quality of home brewed wine convinced them to take all roads back to Rome.
No Romans remained. Britain, both sides of Hadrian's Wall, became a Roman-free zone.
Except....
There was one little town where the Roman bugle-song anthem of retreat, 'Legitus Quickitus', was not heard. One town where the Romans and the locals, ears full of soap, were so busy splashing around together they missed the thunder of the departing last night chariots of fire. And as there were no cabs due for another 15 hundred years - and that's if you believe the cab office - the town's Romans decided to stay.
The town grew, thriving on the naturally occurring spa waters, nurtured by the river Fons and hardened by the combination of original Brits and Roman bath lovers. The last bastion of the Roman Empire, it is now a mighty town
indeed.
The town's name? Spawater, home of the legendary Spawater Baths.
The Spawater Chronicles are the tales of its citizens, and how they take on the world and win.

Youth Market is volume one of The Spawater Chronicles, a
series of seven, relating the adventures of a group of friends, descendents of the Romans, in the old Roman town of Spawater. It tells how they handle cruelty to battered chickens and cruelty to intelligent television viewers.

Volume two sees the introduction of Identity Cards to Spawater. Up with this the Romans shall not put.
Volume three and the government wish to build a Super Casino in town. This entails flattening Lifeboats', the friends' drinking club, for a car park.
It also means demolishing the Spawater Refuge Centre, home of victims of gambling, drinking and drugs, world famous locally as Losers' Corner. The friends object - Lifeboats' is their second home.
Volume four (to be published 2008) tells the story of the government's attempt to build a nuclear power station in the Spawater hills just outside town. It's a power thing.
Volume five (to be published 2009) finds Jady inviting Alison, everyone's favourite Spawaterian, to be his candidate to run for Member of the European Parliament.
'But I know nothing about politics and nothing about the European Union,' protested Alison, baffled. 'Then you are the perfect candidate.' Volume Six? well, I have not finished writing it yet, but it involves the usual gang.

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Tara Davis on June 4, 2007
Format: Paperback
When I read the first few pages of this book, I came to an analogy. I, of course, had an Alison moment (read the book to find out what this means!) and it took a couple of tries to figure out what on earth he was talking about. When I did I laughed so hard I almost cried. Frequently throughout this book, I found myself making other people jump as I read in public,randomly bursting out laughing as I came to fall-off-your-chair-laughing parts of the book. The antics of Jady and the gang never cease to make you laugh, from tv bozos to world war III greenies vs. farmer Tom, you will find yourself falling in love with the characters, and falling off of the sofa laughing!
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Format: Paperback
A bunch of more-or-less off-the-grid friends living in the picturesque town of Spawater get together in their favorite bar and peremptorily plot against the not-quite-twin evils of battery chicken farming and bad television. Many adventures ensue, and these outwardly ordinary middle class folks actually manage to pull something meaningful off without winding up in jail. Very funny! My only criticism is that I can imagine each male character in my mind as a distinct personality, but the female characters all blur together.
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