Stop Walking on Eggshells and over one million other books are available for Amazon Kindle. Learn more
Buy New
  • List Price: $18.95
  • Save: $5.49 (29%)
FREE Shipping on orders over $35.
In Stock.
Ships from and sold by
Gift-wrap available.
Have one to sell? Sell on Amazon
Flip to back Flip to front
Listen Playing... Paused   You're listening to a sample of the Audible audio edition.
Learn more
See all 3 images

Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder Paperback – January 2, 2010

See all 13 formats and editions Hide other formats and editions
Amazon Price New from Used from
"Please retry"
"Please retry"
$10.98 $5.94
Unknown Binding
"Please retry"

Frequently Bought Together

Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder + I Hate You--Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality + The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder: New Tools and Techniques to Stop Walking on Eggshells
Price for all three: $35.91

Buy the selected items together

Hero Quick Promo
12 Days of Kindle Book Deals
Load your library with Amazon's editors' picks, $2.99 or less each today only. Learn more

Product Details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: New Harbinger Publications; Second Edition edition (January 2, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1572246901
  • ISBN-13: 978-1572246904
  • Product Dimensions: 0.8 x 6 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (349 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #4,264 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews


"Stop Walking on Eggshells makes good on its promise to restore the lives of people in close relationships with someone diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD). It is a rich guide to understanding and coping with the reactions aroused in others by troubling BPD behaviors that negatively impact relationships. Readers will find this book very useful and beneficial."
—Nina W. Brown, EdD, professor and Eminent Scholar at Old Dominion University in Norfolk, VA, author of Children of the Self-Absorbed

"This book is the absolute go-to guide for my clients who are dealing with a loved one with borderline personality disorder. Readable and thorough, it strikes a perfect balance of practical advice and emotional sensitivity. This book has helped so many people break through their sense of confusion and isolation by helping them to name, understand, and respond to the difficulties of this complex and misunderstood disorder."
—Daniel E. Mattila, M.Div., LCSW

"This book is urgently needed now that a National Institutes of Health study shows that 6 percent of the general population has borderline personality disorder (BPD). I constantly get requests from families needing resources on BPD, and I recommend Stop Walking On Eggshells almost every time. This second edition is really easy to read and packed with even more useful tips for family members in distress."
—Bill Eddy, LCSW, attorney, mediator, clinical social worker, and author of High Conflict People in Legal Disputes and Splitting

"Amazingly, Stop Walking On Eggshells not only teaches readers how to recognize the signs of borderline personality disorder, it also shows how they can make life and relationship decisions based on what they want and need instead of decisions controlled by the illness."
—Julie A. Fast, author of Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder

From the Publisher

This book helps the friends and family members of people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) understand the condition, help their loved ones find effective treatment, and stop feeling as though they are walking on eggshells to avoid confrontations with BPD sufferers.

More About the Authors

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Customer Reviews

This was a very informative book.
Great book for families and friends of people with borderline personality disorder.
Therese DEncarnacao
This book helps one understand and take steps to "take your life back".

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

237 of 244 people found the following review helpful By Rachael on May 24, 2010
Format: Paperback
This book is GREAT for understanding BPD, wrapping your head around how this mental illness works and what it looks like.... BUT, as a nonBPD - after years of therapy and trying to use the methods for dealing w/a BPD mother, I finally figured out she would never stop violating the healthy boundaries I finally built, and therefore, it was unhealthy for me to have anything more than a very limited amount of contact with her. Like many adult children of BPD parent(s) (or alcoholic parents), I found this book would add to my overall understanding about my mother, but not necessarily help me understand the effects my mother had on ME. While it was important for my own sake to try and see if I could establish healthier dynamics with my mom, it got to the point where I had to admit defeat - and it would be nice if there were more books/support out there for the idea of ending relationships with toxic parents. Books like "Eggshells" might be more useful for parents of a BPD child/teen, where the choice to end the relationship isn't an option, and where the power is naturally shifted in the direction of the non-BPD. I recommend 'Walking on Eggshells", but I also recommend reading books like "Recovery: A guide for Adult Children of Alcoholics (just replace the word 'alcoholic' with 'BPD') by Gravitz & Bowden, "Emotional Blackmail" by Susan Forward, "Emotional Vampires" by Bernstein, "Understanding the Borderline Mother" by Lawson, "Codependent No More" by Beattie, "When you and your mother can't be friends" by Secunda, "Will I ever be good enough?" by McBride, "Healing the child within" by Whitfield, "Boundaries" and "Where to Draw the line" by Anne Katherine, "Healing the Shame that binds you" by Bradshaw, and "The Emotional Incest Syndrome" by Patricia Love. All of these books gave me different pieces that finally help me put the puzzle together of what I went through as a child and the skills I needed to heal myself and be a healthy adult.
10 Comments Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
45 of 45 people found the following review helpful By Peter on November 18, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition
I was in a relationship for about two years with a man who was extremely manipulative and controlling. I had no idea what borderline personality disorder was, and I also had no idea that I was under this consistent cycle of emotional abuse. I constantly felt as though I was being attacked emotionally, as if I were the source of all his problems. When I saw the title of this book, it spoke to me on an entirely different level. I realized I had been walking on eggshells around my boyfriend. I was constantly worried about hurting him emotionally, and he had made me feel like a horrible monster even though I logically knew I had done nothing wrong.

Reading this book was my saving grace. I couldn't change his behavior, but I also didn't let him guilt me into continuing on in a relationship that wasn't making me happy. In my search for happiness, I also discovered 21 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy. I think this book has helped me get past my breakup and move forward with my life. I was constantly feeling guilt over perceived indiscretions that were objectively not my fault. I had to realize that I cared too much about what other people thought of me. One of the chapters in 21 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy talks about just that. It delves into advice on how to give up that negative thought pattern. I still care about what people think of me in certain situations, but never to the point that it ends up damaging me emotionally.

In the end, dealing with a BPD sufferer is incredibly painful and difficult. Luckily, I got out of my relationship unscathed.
Read more ›
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
123 of 135 people found the following review helpful By hardwheel on October 13, 2012
Format: Paperback
I was in a relationship with a woman for 18 months that was BPD. I had no idea what a BPD was, and hadn't really realized what I was dealing with until the relationship was pretty much over. I had been accussed of constantly looking at other women, including her best friend, mother and young girls. I put up with this even though I KNEW I hadn't done anything wrong. When we would fight and split up for a day or two, she slept around with several people, and I continued to let it ride for some reason and took her back time after time. She often accused me of having affairs when I traveled at work. She had intense anger that was explosive and uncontrollable...from the tiniest slights like forgetting a date or time we would be doing something. She would drink heavily during them and actually come after me do real harm to me. I put up with this. I had been accussed of being a narcissist and generally horrible person. I started to doubt myself after awhile...Maybe I am really doing these things. Maybe I am this horrible person.

To make a long story VERY short, it wound up ending badly with legal entanglements because of her actions. Once away from her I started to research her behavior and found BPD. Now she has never been diagnosed, and as far as she is concerned, she has NO problem. It's this or that. She will never be better until she faces it. I cannot do that for her. But anyway the book made me realize that I was NOT crazy. It was so hard to get through this. Therapy DOES help a lot, but this book was my salvation. It reads like it was written about she and I. Scarily. Also I had borrowed this book from the library (I have my own copy on the way) and I saw the worn pages, folded corners and stars by sections in the book. I knew I wasn't alone in this.
Read more ›
4 Comments Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again

Most Recent Customer Reviews