Customer Reviews

Strong, Smart, and Bold: Empowering Girls for Life

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This book reminded me of the thoughts I had when our younger daughter was born. How could my wife and I help her to have an open door to pursue the opportunities that meant the most to her? I wish this book had been available to us then!

Give this book to parents when their daughters are born.

The foreword by Ms. Jane Fonda particularly moved me. She describes how she went from being a person with strong ambitions to a teenager who was timid and concerned about how others would see her. For many years, her "inner voice" was lost, and she finds herself only recapturing it in her sixties.

The model of this book is to have girls know their rights as people and to be advocates of those rights for herself and others. Girls Inc. was founded in 1945 and has done good work in helping establish equal opportunity by gender.

The organization has established a bill of rights for girls that includes the right to:

-- "be themselves and to resist gender stereotypes"

-- "express themselves with originality and enthusiasm"

-- "take roles, to strive freely, and to take pride in success"

-- "accept and appreciate their bodies"

-- "have confidence in their selves and to be safe in the world"

-- "prepare for interesting work and economic independence."

Many people would agree that these are worthy goals. What I liked was that the book reported about research that Girls Inc. has conducted to find out how parents can help.

As you may have guessed, girls look to their Moms to lead the way. In a recent survey, 99 percent replied that Mom was their heroine and guide to planning their own lives. By describing her own life choices at the same age, Mom can help make these transitions more understandable and positive.

Further, Mom and Dad can work together to emphasize filling in experiences and knowledge that girls might not otherwise get. Why shouldn't girls find out how cars work? Sons will often benefit from the same instruction. I know I would have.

Unlike many books and research on gender issues, this book does not try to make males out as the villain of the problem. Instead, the book emphasizes how girls can become more knowledgeable, confident, and able to take care of themselves. I was especially impressed with the section called "My Future."

After you read and discuss this book, I suggest that you think back to where you lacked support (whether you were a girl or a boy) as a youngster. Will your children have the same issues? If so, how can you help them have better choices and capabilities? What other issues will your children have that you did not? How can you help with those?

Give your children the benefit of thinking through their lives carefully and knowledgeably . . . with as few limits as possible!

For anyone who has a daughter, niece, sister. For mothers who were once-upon-a-time daughters. For fathers, uncles and friends. This is required reading and requested sharing. It is a realistic definition of "empowering" -- but more, of "inspiring" -- girls to find/use their voices and goals within a society that still has a "pink and blue" mentality. The base -- an organization, Girls Incorporated, that has inspired millions of girls for more than 80 years to discover, stretch, and own their possibilities. The content is not anti-male but is full of realistic (and research-based) ideas to help young girls (based on Girls Inc. experience with girls nationwide) reach their full potential. Everyday tips and experiences; teachable moments; eye- and mind-opening opportunties. No lectures; no heavy research -- just a solid dose of reality. Valuable for grown-up girls, too! (Mid-life crisis gift??)

While many books now box girls into gender sterotypes,this book shows girls how to reinforce their confidence so they can overcome societal pressure to conform to the myths about girls and their abilities.You do not here the usuall "girls can't do math" or "girls are less aggressive" those being the sterotypes to overcome..what you read are insightful tools to reinforce confidence and individuality.

The book is put together by Girls Inc., a nonprofit organization that focuses on the needs of girls from toddler age, all the way through adolescence, and is meant for anyone who is raising a girl or who has a significant relationship with a girl. The book is an easy read and is full of exercises, some of which the adult does by herself, but most of which are done with the girl. All the exercises are aimed at helping you, the adult, get to know the girl and yourself, and to help both her and you navigate some of the pitfalls that are encountered by girls and women in our society, while paying special attention to what the individual girl actually feels wants and needs. As such, the book is light on dogma, and this is one of its best features. It includes a lot of sensitive exploration and practical advice, which is a relief for any parent or concerned adult who is bewildered or heartbroken at seeing a girl in her life struggling with and falling into gender traps.

Because the book is based on the experiences of Girls Inc. it contains lots and lots of examples and quotes, from actual women and girls. The discussions and exercises are broken up into six chapters and a conclusion: Raising a Girl Who Knows Her Rights, Resisting Gender Stereotypes, Speaking Freely and Openly, Taking Risks and Achieving Goals, Accepting and Appreciating One's Body, Being Confident and Safe, and Preparing for Economic Independence and Crating an Equitable Society. The structure of the book is based on the Girls Inc. Girls' Bill of Rights: "A girl has the right to be herself and to resist gender stereotypes; a girl has the right to express herself with originality and enthusiasm; a girl has the right to take risks, to strive freely, and to take pride in success; a girl has the right to accept and appreciate her body; a girl has the right to have confidence in herself and to be safe in thee world; a girl has the right to prepare for interesting work and economic independence."

"Strong, Smart and Bold" also has some shortcomings. It's implicitly written for adult women, which is fine, but unacknowledged. Many exercises ask a woman to reflect on her own girlhood. It would be nice if there were resources that helped men be allies to girls too, but you won't find that in this book. Though girls are encouraged to express how they feel and what they think, which allows for a lot of diversity, there is zero discussion of different gender identities among people who are labeled as girls, which I, as a gender nonstandard person found a bit frustrating. Additionally, I found the discussion of boundaries and limit setting to be a bit difficult, though I understood why the book hammered on the needs of effective limit setting for girls with such force. Also, while the book holds and explores some basic feminist assumptions -- mainly the inherent dignity and right to empowerment of girls and women -- it fails to explore some related topics very deeply. "Alternative" family structures and community arrangements are given a general favorable nod, but most examples are still based on women who are single or paired with one male partner and living in fairly conventional suburban or urban single-family residences. Girls of many different races are included (in fact the "clientèle" Girls Inc. serves is vary racially diverse) but the topic of race, class and cultural assumptions are not really explored. Likewise, the chapter on economic independence doesn't question the underlying notions of work, monetary success, not to mention capitalism, which seems a shame, especially given the changing times in which we live. This is probably my radical feminist education showing, and your mileage may vary, but, for me, the lack of exploration of these topics was a bit stifling.

Still, I definitely recommend this book as a resource, and think it would support and benefit any parent or concerned adult who wants to help their girl grow up to be well-rounded, confident and successful. My favorite quotes from the book:

A girl who has complete access to her rights is empowered, not limited, by the fact that she is female.

Our challenge is to help a girl set higher expectations for herself yet still capture her imagination about being female.

The best way to inspire a girl to be strong, smart and bold is to help her think through her options and decide what she wants. Our investment is in making sure that when a girl runs up against the status quo and is told "Girls can't do that" or "Women aren't built for that" she will come back with, "Oh yeah?" and then do it anyway--her way.

This is a great book with some great information and activities for empowering girls. I highly recommend that anyone that works with girls (and even parents) to read this book.