Customer Reviews

How to Stubbornly Refuse to Make Yourself Miserable About Anything: Yes, Anything

5 star:		(17)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(6)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

Of my greatest irrational beliefs, the worst was that I was that my life had a greater meaning for this world than anyone else's. After suffering from a panic/anxiety disorder for several years, I was given this book by my therapist. I had partially convinced myself that the philosophical foundation for it was entirely too simple. Don't we all beleive that? "My case is a special one.", No My panic attacks aren't because of that, you're not understanding me." , "No one will ever understand why I feel this way." These are exactly the kinds of irrational beliefs that this book can put an end to. It's been in my possession for two weeks, and in that time I have had peace and clarity and a sense of mastery over my anxiety I have never had before. You're not different. You're not being singled out by God. Your belief that you are is the kind of irrational thinking that means you're right for this book. You're a human. Anxiety is part of life. Learn to cope with it rationally.

This is clearly Albert Ellis's best self-help book on rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). In "How to Stubbornly Refuse to Make Yourself Miserable About Anything--Yes, Anything," Ellis makes the simple, yet profound point that "you can figure out by sheer logic that if you were only . . . to stay with your desires and preferences, and if you were never...to stray into unrealistic demands that your desires have to be fulfilled, you could very rarely disturb...yourself about anything" (p. 21). At the end of the book, Ellis identifies various unfortunate potential life circumstances and then shows readers how to use his REBT refuse to feel disturbed. I strongly recommend this book for the general public. Mental health professionals will also find this book to be a helpful resource to learn the theory and practice of REBT.

Dr. Ellis thinks most people create their own misery by distorted thinking (such as 'I must be perfect'; 'everyone else must be perfect'; and 'the world must be perfect'.) The neat part is that if one has distorted thinking, one can *change* that thinking. A powerful self-help book and one of the few which can be 'life changing'. No hint of 'positive thinking', 'count your blessings', or 'trust in <fill in the blank>. Highly recommended.

This book is another valuable addition to the REBT literature. This work by Ellis stresses the importance of using the scientific method to ged rid of self-defeating negative emotions. The way you do this is to find the thoughts that you are harassing yourself with and set them up as a hypothesis. You then vigorously question the validity of your hypotheses. Invariably, if you stick with it long enough you will find that the thoughts behind your inappropriate emotions: 1. Do not conform to reality. 2. Are illogical--e.g., just because you want something it doesn't follow that you should or must get it. And 3. Are self-defeating--that is they make you get more of what you don't want and less of what you do want. This is a fine, hard-headed, practical book to use to improve your life.

I really enjoyed the book. It is very informative and an excellent primer on REBT psychology. Ellis is courageous and daring in his convictions and by the end of the first three chapters you are as convinced as he is. The problem is after the first three chapters you really don't need the book. It becomes long and perhaps overdrawn, in the way an ideologue drives his point home through constant reiteration. Maybe that's the power of the book-- the repetition. All in all this is a worthy self-help book.

The ABC's of Rational Emotive Therapy are presented in a not so scientific approach that allows for greater comprehension and absorption of the material. It's a common sense approach to dealing with our irrational concepts. The words "Self-Help" actually apply to this book. The ideas learned here will be useful for every life situation for the duration of your life.

Of course no book will "solve all my problems". But, this book has specific "exercises" and "techniques" to help you with almost any problem---to help you feel better at least.

One of the " rational thought techniques" in the book is to learn to accept the "defects" and "imperfections" in things and the "defects" and "imperfections" in people as "normal"---"that's just the way he/she is"----"that crack in the cement is 'the way it's supposed to be'"..."it's NOT supposed to be perfect". "My significant other doesn't always treat me right"--accept the reality that "that's the way he/she is and that's the best they can do." The idea is that if we can accept all the "imperfections" of the world that bother us, then we can be happier if we accept these imperfections as "just the way things are supposed to be"..... Email boland7214@aol.co

Recommended

Albert Ellis tells it the way it is. This book gives numerous techniques to rid yourself of irrational thinking patterns. I believe the irrational thoughts are the basis of misery. It has helped my and my cllients more than any other approach. The book is humorous and easy to read for the non-professional.

Some of the reviews of this book highlight the very issue REBT addresses; namely, the incorrect assumption that other people or situations make us unhappy. What he outlines is this book is not new; the concepts have been around at least from the time of the Roman Macus Aurelius. This book does an excellent job of describing how to decide your emotion in many different situations. If we are honest with ourselves, we will come to realize we all choose our emotions on everything!

I recommend this book, but only gave it four stars because it could have been written a bit more concisely.

We all tend to carry in our heads some false messages which are self-defeating. By changing these tapes and getting rid of irrational thoughts we can then live happier and more successful lives, according to Ellis.

The theory of Rational Emotive Therapy is really quite simple. So is its practice. RET cuts right to the heart of the problem.Anyone giving RET a try as described in this book will probably reap distinct benefits with virtually no risk and little effort compared with other more time-consuming therapies.