145 of 156 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
...And now for something completely relevant!, July 31, 1999
By A Customer
....
Ten Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives is a summary of
self-defeating behaviors women use to hide their lack of self-esteem
and fear of following their dreams. By using real-life examples from
her professional practice and her nartionally syndicated radio show,
Dr. Laura explains the thinking (or lack of thought) behind poor
decisions that have a harmful impact on women, their families, and
their friends. These poor decisions are usually the easy out, and
often compromise a person's integrity or plans for the
future. Dr. Laura effectively demonstrates how withstanding momentary
discomforts lead to a positive self-image and utlimately fulfilling
life.
I read this book about a year ago (not voluntarily at first,
my parents made me) and I am glad I did. Learning from the mistakes of
others is always better than repeating them yourself. I don't give a
whit what mistakes Dr. Laura has made, because it's irrelevant to the
merit of her message. Everything she says in her book is true; I have
personally witnessed many relationships gone awry due to the behaviors
Dr. Laura lists in her book. So if you want to be a happier, stronger
person, this book can point you in the right direction. But only if
you are willing to *honestly* reassess your own thoughts and actions
without being a spineless jellyfish.
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40 of 41 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Wake up and smell the coffee, November 19, 2001
By A Customer
This review is from: Ten Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives (Paperback)
I don't think this book deserves the low marks it's recieved here. Laura Schlesinger, for all her faults, is a perceptive woman, refreshing contrarian and-at her best moments-one tough, opinionated broad. Before she veered to the religious right around 1995, she wrote this book which is quite good and, contrary to what many might think, feminist. It's a good book to read or give to a young woman as Schlesinger takes a ferocious and unsentimental stand on the value of independence, risk-taking, hard work, courage and accountability. She's very hard on women who choose to see themselves as the victim in their life and relationships-one of the reasons she's so rabidly disliked by those who find not only succor-but their complete identity-in female victimhood. Schlesinger's L.A. talk show in the early nineties was riveting stuff as she took on just about every cliched, whiny cop-out that came her way. She always had the guts to say what a lot of people think, but don't have the guts to express-and I think she truly helped many of her callers see the light. The unfortunate thing about her more recent moral ranting is that it takes away from some of the excellent insights she's capable of. If you're looking for a self help book that will do more than tell you what you want to hear and repeat the same old cliches about how you are being vicitmized in your life by loser boyfriends, ex-husbands, "loving too much", "society", whatever, I recommend this.
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98 of 111 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Live and Learn or Listen to Laura!, July 12, 2002
This review is from: Ten Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives (Paperback)
You have to ask yourself one question. Why do authors who are divorced write all the marriage and self-help books? Well in five words: "They learned from the experience."
If you want advice from a woman who has "been there/done that" then Dr. Laura is a good source of wisdom. She has fallen, picked herself up and moved on. Girlfriend, this is one woman who isn't going to take it anymore. She looks at the facts, pushes aside the romantic ideals and makes you face the reality of your situation. Personally, I kinda like her "in your face truth attitude." It is refreshing to finally hear what no one else will tell you. Dr. Laura's hope is that people will learn to live more balanced lives.
She takes a look at our unrealistic drives and primal needs. She says the "ultimate stupidity" is withholding from yourself the respect you deserve. She shows how women often tolerate obnoxious male behaviors in order to avoid loneliness, self-assertiveness, and self-sufficiency.
The lovely contents include chapters on Attachment, Courtship, Devotion, Passion, Cohabitation, Expectations, Conception, Subjugation, Helplessness and Forgiving. While most of this book seems to be for women who are dating, every woman should read this book.
"It is your job as a woman, as a person, to become as fully realized as you can by having dreams, forging a purpose, building an identity, having courage, and making commitments to things outside of yourself. In so doing, you take a more active role in the quality of your own life so that other people-friends, spouses, children-share in your growth rather than become responsible for it. You'll feel super. And you'll feel really womanly-as opposed to babyish or girlish-perhaps for the first time." ~Dr. Laura
She answers the following questions:
Why hasn't he called? (Short Answer: Are you sure you want him to?)
Do you really want to be with someone who is not giving you back what you're giving?
Are you a volunteer hostage?
How do I teach a man to respect me?
What is true Intimacy?
What is sexual addiction?
Should you hang in there or leave?
What is the difference between Sexual Passion and Mature Love?
Who is really responsible for birth control?
Even Dr. Laura is willing to admit there is no life without pain. "The experience and the survival of pain are often the price of growth."
What if you can bypass some of this pain?
Would that be worth the price of this book?
YES!
Ok, I admit, I borrowed this from my mother. ;) Now she will
have to read the highlighted version.
~The Rebecca Review
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