Customer Reviews

Styles of Loving

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I loved this book when I first read it many years ago, it's a shame it's out of print now. Written by two marriage counsellors (Lasswell and Lobenz I believe), it's a great guide to bridging gaps and further our understanding of our personal differences. I disagree with another reviewer in that its aim is not to tell you if Mr. or Ms. X is right for you, nor to help you "shop" for the right person.

In any event there are six general categories of different emotional "types" or profiles, and most people are a combination of several. The basic groups are: (1) best friend, (2) logical, (3) romantic, (4) game playing, (5) unselfish, and (6) obsessive/possessive. The descriptions are helpful and a great starting point to better understand where another person is coming from and what makes them feel loved. No type is considered right or wrong, or good or bad. It's more about understanding differences. An excellent read and worth getting your hands on a copy if you can. Oh, and if you're a woman wanting to know if a particular man is "right" for you (or a healthy choice for a loving relationship)... I suggest another book as well called "The Classified Man, 22 Types of Men and What to do about them" by Susannah Hoffman, an anthropologist who knows what she's talking about and is fun and witty to boot. These two books opened up my eyes a lot more than most I've seen on the shelves on the topic of love and relationships.

I found this book to be an invaluable and practical way to figure out why I get into the relationships I get into, and also to determine if the person I'm dating (or interested in) is really right for me. This book saved me months of heartbreak in one relationship in particular, when I got my love interest to take the test and realized from the results that she was totally wrong for me -- even though I thought I was in love with her!