35 of 39 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Men, Don't Dare Miss Out On This Big Book Of Southern Female Secrets!, May 6, 2008
This review is from: Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On!: What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters that the Rest of Y'all Should Know Too (Paperback)
In her newest book, Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On!: What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters that the Rest of Y'all Should Know Too, Shellie Rushing Tomlinson has done it again! Her very funny instruction manual bares all!
FINALLY someone has revealed all the well-kept secrets of the Southern Mama Society (SMS). We men in the South have grown up fully convinced that there were some things going on around us that molded our existences without our knowledge. We also got the feeling that we were cooperators unawares. It seemed our behavior was somehow being manipulated by unknown forces beyond our control.
IT'S ALL TRUE! . . . and its far more developed, widespread, and networked than we could EVER have imagined. Who would have known . . . but only among the Southern boys and men, of course! Our women have known these things for generations!
Here is where Shellie really lets the cat out of the bag, "...I wasn't very old before I realized that Mama and her girlfriends were good at getting their husbands to do what they wanted, all the while letting the men think it was their own idea. Some people would call this manipulation. Southern women call it charm."
"Charm" does make manipulation SOUND better. All this time I thought charm was good when it was really SMS code for "get your way."
As Shellie says, "...our mamas believe in putting a shoulder to your dreams and feet to your prayers. If you want it, go after it. Things may not always work out the way you hope, but let it never be because you didn't try. Forgive me if that doesn't fit with your stereotypical idea of the fragile southern belle who spends her days resting on the couch and fanning herself between fainting spells, but I don't know that mythical breed. The southern female of my experience is more likely to gear up for battle than retreat to the sofa."
That's been my experience, as I'm sure most Southern men will agree.
Are we Southern men ever fortunate to have all these well-hidden secrets of the SMS revealed! It will revolutionize the way we view ourselves and those women around us. Now we know the shorthand and signals of the SMS. Knowledge is power!
MEN, be VERY CAREFUL how you use this knowledge. If you get a little heavy handed, you might have to go for burgers . . . or possibly worse. The members of the SMS can get even in ways most of us have not even imagined until Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On! I suspect there are at least as many that Shellie Tomlinson has not yet revealed. I'll hide in the weeds (a Southern man saying) waiting for Book 2 on the subject.
DO NOT overlook the absolutely delicious recipes Shellie includes. Check this out: Pork Roast Barbecue Recipe--This is killin' goood! It'll make you want slap yore mama . . . as we say in the South. But as Shellie points out, it's only a fool who would think of tryin'!
And the recipes for all those dips and sauces! I can't wait to try them. They suggest many of the absolutely scrumptious flavors I've learned to love in Southern cooking.
MEN, get your copy quick! This stuff is too good to miss! Don't just read it: MEMORIZE IT!
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Shellie Has Outdone Herself This Time!, May 6, 2008
This review is from: Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On!: What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters that the Rest of Y'all Should Know Too (Paperback)
Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On!: What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters that the Rest of Y'all Should Know Too Shellie Rushing Tomlinson has given us another great book. Having enjoying Lessons Learned on Bull Run Road and Southern Comfort, I was ready for a new book of her Southern humor combined with spiritual wisdom. This new one is bigger and better than ever. We have 304 pages and ten big beautiful chapters to enjoy. Every story leads into the next one, but you can pick up her book and open it anywhere to enjoy it. Shellie is a naturally funny person.
Suck Your Stomach In is too funny to read anywhere you are trying to be quiet. For example, she tells why her sisters had plans for a singing group like the Mandrells, except for one little problem. Shellie claims that she can't sing. She said they always grew tired of singing when she tried to join in. One of my favorites is the story about the appropriate response when her mother asked her, "If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?" Buy it and find out the correct answer.
This book is full of lagniappe (extra little bonuses like the thirteenth role in a baker's dozen). One of its bonuses is the expansion of vocabulary through the explanation of Southern speak. "Yard youngun" is an example.
She quotes women from all over the South. Shellie must have hundreds of hilarious friends, because the little quotes are side-splitting funny. She puts their clever comments in little boxes throughout. Shellie, always playful with the formats in her books, keeps her books interesting.
She has placed recipes at the ends of the chapters. This woman knows how to cook. She understands the value of flavoring her food with a combination of the good stuff like bell peppers, celery, and onions cooked in bacon grease or olive oil; and she knows how to cook great food such as crawfish.
She shares the treasures of Southern-Mamahood wisdom about these subjects:
-- What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Life, Faith, and Education:
"Into every life a little rain must fall, but if you have a good umbrella and a tube of red lipstick you can get through anything."
--What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Sex, Dating, and Coming of Age:
"No one would buy a cow when they could get the milk for free."
--What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Love and Marriage:
"There are plenty of fish in the sea."
-- What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Having and Raising Children:
This boils down to trusting your instincts.
--What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Cooking and Stretching the Budget:
She talks about how to stretch food, and she mentions something I've not heard since my childhood: "Save the bath water!"
--What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Cleaning and Keeping House:
She says, "Pick it up and it won't pile up." When will I learn that?
--What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Beauty and Fashion:
Frosted blue eye shadow is for hussies!
--What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Acceptance, Growing Young, and Watching `Ya Figah:
If you have to step into a bathtub with a mirror where you can see yourself, throw a sheet over the mirror.
--What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters about Manners and Social Graces:
Say ma'am and sir. Write thank you notes.
--Miscellaneous Pearls of Wisdom from Our Southern Mamas:
"For a Southern Mama, caring for loved ones isn't optional. It's their life's mission, and heaven help anyone who gets in their way."
Every woman will need a copy of this book for personal reference, one for each daughter and daughter-in-law, and one for each girl graduate.
I am wondering whether we should let men in on all this knowledge. They may take advantage. Oh, go ahead and let the men read it. My man friend got his hands on it. Reading it, he smiled and laughed so much that he now looks ten years younger. He keeps slapping himself. Maybe it's the exercise.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
A Great Gift for Your Southern Mama!, July 29, 2008
This review is from: Suck Your Stomach In and Put Some Color On!: What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters that the Rest of Y'all Should Know Too (Paperback)
I am a huge fan of Shellie's (and have been since listening to the audio version of Lessons Learned on Bull Run Road) so I knew I would enjoy her latest book. Shellie could be my little sister. It's like we were raised by the same woman! Suck Your Stomach In helped this 48-year-old woman relive my own amazing childhood by triggering old, long-forgotten memories, and I cannot thank Shellie enough! I recently gave a copy to my dear Southern Mama as a birthday gift and she's loving it, too.
Get this book for your Mama, your sisters, and even your men who were raised by a Southern Mama. They'll love it!
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