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The Superior Wife Syndrome: Why Women Do Everything So Well and Why--for the Sake of Our Marriages--We've Got to Stop [Hardcover]

Carin Rubenstein (Author)
3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)

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Book Description

September 8, 2009
The modern woman has felt Backlash and worked The Second Shift. but now she’s wearing the pants, she’s in charge of everything, and it’s ruining her marriage. She’s The Superior Wife, and this book is coming to her rescue!

As women have risen in the work world, their marriages have been transformed, too: The wife has become the superior spouse. This book is for every wife who brings home the bacon, fries it up in a pan that she washes, and drops from exhaustion at the end of each day, while her husband watches the game. The Superior Wife explains how she got here and reveals how she can work her way back to marital equality. Bringing together personal stories of everyday couples and expert social analysis, psychologist Carin Rubenstein provides readers with an intelligent and groundbreaking look into a disturbing marital trend: In two out of three marriages, women are running the show while men take it easy. As a result, more and more women are rejecting marriage as a viable social institution. The Superior Wife provides a look into the heart of modern marriage, as it reveals and explores:

• Six degrees of superiority: from being the multitasker to the decider • Top 26 topics wives nag their husbands about, from A to Z

• Four types of modern marriage, from Captain and Mates to Even-Stevens

• Top ten sex wishes of husbands and wives

• Four types of married sex, from Old Shoe Sex to Hot Sex

• 21 ways to fix a superior wife marriage

Filled with personal stories and packed with tips for curing the syndrome, The Superior Wife gives women the tools they need to step down from their thrones, reconnect with their husband, and have happier and healthier marriage.


Frequently Bought Together

Customers buy this book with Change Your Mindset, Not Your Man: Learn to Love What's Right Instead of Trying to Fix What's Wrong $10.17

The Superior Wife Syndrome: Why Women Do Everything So Well and Why--for the Sake of Our Marriages--We've Got to Stop + Change Your Mindset, Not Your Man: Learn to Love What's Right Instead of Trying to Fix What's Wrong


Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

In this provocative survey of modern marriage, Rubenstein deconstructs the myth of the superwoman: she who holds down a career, serves as caregiver to her children and husband and keeps the home-but at what cost? According to Rubenstein, it's her psychological health and marital satisfaction. Labeling this woman "the superior wife," Rubenstein makes readers reconsider their own judgments regarding superiority, men and women, and the perilous state of modern marriage. Drawing data primarily from a set of web surveys of couples, this book may not be entirely scientific, but it paints a convincing picture of women victimized by outrageous expectations. Rubenstein's common sense solution is surrender: to the idea that she cannot do everything, to the fact that their partners must step up as equal participants in all aspects of marriage and child rearing. Though not exactly revolutionary, Rubenstein's concept is based in popular studies, and addresses an increasingly popular notion among women that marriage is a losing proposition. Rubenstein's constant reiteration can leave readers feeling browbeaten, but her relationship anecdotes will definitely give readers pause, as well as some useful strategies for implementing genuine equality between spouses.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

"Rubenstein's stories of wives and husbands ring true and will surely resonate with many women who fi nd themselves taking on more than they expected to, getting less of the support and equality they planned on, and wondering how to get the pleasure they so hoped for in their marriages." -- Dalma Heyn, author of The Erotic Silence of the American Wife and Marriage Shock: The Transformation of Women into Wives

"Any reader will find themselves identifying with Carin Rubenstein's 'state of modern marriage' -- if not themselves, then their parents or adult children. A wake-up call for marital evolution, if not revolution." -- Gail Sheehy, author of Passages and Sex and the Seasoned Woman

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Touchstone (September 8, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1416566783
  • ISBN-13: 978-1416566786
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.4 x 1.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #742,935 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

11 Reviews
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4 star:
 (1)
3 star:    (0)
2 star:
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1 star:
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Average Customer Review
3.4 out of 5 stars (11 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

8 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Marriage Resource, October 12, 2009
This review is from: The Superior Wife Syndrome: Why Women Do Everything So Well and Why--for the Sake of Our Marriages--We've Got to Stop (Hardcover)
The title of this book might lead you to believe that it is another book about being the "perfect wife". However, it is actually teaching women to let go and be a little "less perfect". In today's world, women tend to over-achieve while letting their men off the hook. Rubenstein believes this is unhealthy in a marriage, leading to resentment on both sides. While some might see the author as a man-hater, I didn't get that. I understood her to be encouraging women to let their men step up to the plate and take responsibility that is theirs as well. I feel it is a great resource for both men and women who are trying to improve their marriage.
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10 of 13 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Helpful, October 5, 2009
By 
Dill Pickles (Sitka, AK United States) - See all my reviews
This review is from: The Superior Wife Syndrome: Why Women Do Everything So Well and Why--for the Sake of Our Marriages--We've Got to Stop (Hardcover)
I was a little worried that this book WAS going to be bias as the comment before had said, but boy was I wrong. It really helped open my husbands eyes! He realized that I am a pretty darn good wife and he doesn't have it that hard. He even thinks that I am amazing person and wouldn't trade me for any other girl. He has started helping me more with stuff instead of complaining. This book helped me make him open his eyes in a very easy nice way. We are both much happier and have more fun doing things together like cleaning, taking care of the kids etc. I tell all wifes and soon to be's that they should get this book to have a healthier and happier marriage
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars Disappointing., August 29, 2010
By 
M. Wirth (Seattle, WA United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: The Superior Wife Syndrome: Why Women Do Everything So Well and Why--for the Sake of Our Marriages--We've Got to Stop (Hardcover)
I am surprised at the number of positive reviews here. This book is simply the results of the author's research. There are chapters and chapters of case studies in which a wife does significantly more that the husband. That's it. i kept reading, thinking that eventually there would be some guidance for those who experience this type of marriage. There was almost none. I am very disappointed.
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