Surviving Domestic Violence: Voices of Women Who Broke Free [Paperback]

Elaine Weiss (Author)

Book Description

ISBN-10: 1888106964 | ISBN-13: 978-1888106961 | Publication Date: January 2, 2000 | Edition: 2nd

This is not a reference text about domestic violence. It is not an instructional manual on how to escape from a batterer. Plenty of these exist. It is a travel guide to a country no one visits willingly, the collective tales of past travelers making the landscape less threatening, less alien. I hope the many voices in this book will convince you that these stories belong to all of us. Domestic abuse doesn't just happen "out there" somewhere--it happens in our town, in our neighborhood, on our street. It happens to people we see at the supermarket, the movie theater, the ballet, the bowling alley, and the PTA board meeting. It happens to our friends, our coworkers, and our family members. Women who have experienced domestic abuse look just like everyone else. They look just like me. Abused women look just like Judy North, a first-grade teacher from Nebraska who remained with her abusive husband for ten years, until the night she finally stood up to him...and woke up in the emergency room. Abused women look just like Whitney Benson, a Mormon college student from southern Utah. She worries about the scars on her face from her boyfriend's class ring; I worry about the scars on her soul from his carefully crafted campaign of criticism, intimidation, and punishing rape. And abused women look just like Andrea Hartley, a pediatrician in her late forties who considers herself extremely fortunate. Although the man she married when she was thirty proved to be extremely violent, the emotional support of her family, friends, and medical colleagues enabled her to leave him only four months later. They come from all walks of life. Some are well educated; others barely finished high school. Some come from wealthy families; others come from poor ones. Some witnessed terrifying family violence as children; others never heard an angry word. Some were raised by warm, supportive families; others by cold, distant families. Some married young; others married late. They worship in churches, in synagogues, or not at all. They come from big cities, small towns, farming communities, and suburbs. What these women have in common is that each was in an intimate relationship with a man who abused her. Some were abused physically. Some were abused sexually. All were abused psychologically...the most devastating type of abuse, leaving the deepest wounds. This is not a book about guns, knives, emergency rooms, or police reports. Many stories focus instead on the subtle campaign of abuse, wearying and corrosive, which trapped their teller in a web of daily threat. Yet despite the humiliation, fear, and isolation, each woman managed to escape from her abuser. Theirs are stories, not of frailty, but of clarity, resourcefulness, and strength.

Editorial Reviews

Review

Battered women will find this book life-affirming. All readers will find it informative, well-written, and even riveting. -- Andy Klein, Columnist, National Bulletin on Domestic Violence Prevention

This book will save lives. Everyone knows someone who needs to read this important book. -- Rachel Naomi Remen, MD, Author, Kitchen Table Wisdom, My Grandfather’s Blessings

Weiss finds that breaking isolation is the key to leaving, only she calls it "escaping". A must read! -- Joan Zorza, Esq., Editor, Domestic Violence Report and Sexual Assault Report --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

From the Publisher

It is with pride that Volcano Press is publishing Elaine Weiss. Her books demonstrate the great advances in the struggle against family violence that have taken place since we first published BATTERED WIVES in the early 1970s.

In those early days, a handful of feminists, scattered across the United States, were creating shelters for battered women--without funding, without community understanding, against great odds. It was and still is a historic movement.

Today, we have the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), which established an agency of the U.S. Department of Justice. In addition, there are many state domestic violence coalitions and a myriad of local and national programs to support battered women.

And, as author Elaine Weiss says, "Most abused women are not passive victims. They show enormous strength, both while they are within the relationship, and as they work to extricate themselves. One proof of this strength is the huge number who ultimately manage to break free and go on with their lives. They do not wait to be rescued. They rescue themselves. They are resourceful. They fight back. They take care of themselves, and often of their children."

We thank Elaine for giving voices to these women.

Ruth Gottstein, Publisher
Adam Gottstein, Associate Publisher
Volcano Press --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: Agreka Tm Llc; 2nd edition (January 2, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1888106964
• ISBN-13: 978-1888106961
• Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.6 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,065,598 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

24 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars GREAT BOOK!, August 27, 2001

By 

Nancy Tuttle (Ohio) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Surviving Domestic Violence: Voices of Women Who Broke Free (Paperback)

Elaine, I want to thank you for writing this book. I purchased it through Amazon.com about a month ago and it's the best book I've yet to read on Domestic Violence. It is encouraging and supporting. More than any book I've read before on the subject. Oh, sure, other books are good and validating. They describe the issue - the Battered Women's Syndrome and all the things that I needed to learn then. When I was deciding what it was I was in, during my marriage. But now that I'm out (going on 2 years since I filed for divorce and still not divorced), I needed encouragement that I can do it! There IS life after DV! I can be "me" again and get the person I used to be - back!!! Thank you so much for your book. I saw myself in almost every person's story you wrote about. We are all survivors! We are all extremely brave! Thanks again - from the bottom of my heart. Stay safe. God Bless You, Nancy

17 of 17 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The best I've read on domestic violence, May 10, 2000

By 

Judy Van (Wisconsin) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Surviving Domestic Violence: Voices of Women Who Broke Free (Paperback)

I have read almost every book published on this topic and find this one to be outstanding. As an advocate for domestic abuse survivors ,I hear similar stories everyday. I am humbled by their courage. Thank you Dr. Weiss. I plan to share your book with my Women's Support Group tonight.

15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Heart-wrenching but hopeful., February 7, 2000

By 

C. Zelazek (Corvallis, Oregon, USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Surviving Domestic Violence: Voices of Women Who Broke Free (Paperback)

I work in an industry where I see lots of staff members in domestic violence situations. This book shows the strategies and strength needed by women to get out of these situations. I will be using this book at work. For me, it answered a lot of questions about how women can leave, and why they don't leave (when others think they should). Well written and thoughtful book.