Customer Reviews

Surviving Your Adolescents: How to Manage-and Let Go of-Your 13-18 Year Olds

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This book helped me realize that my teenager wasn't as "awful" as I thought and showed me what role I need to take to make this relationship with my teen enjoyable. Great guidelines of acceptable/unacceptable behavior for teens to help us 1st time teen parents. Also wonderful discipline ideas that are sensible!

I am a clinical social worker and recommend this book to clients struggling with their teenagers all the time, and all who have read it tell me how helpful it is. The advice is clear and practical, especially in deciding when to be flexible and when to be firm. I also like the emphasis on maintaining a good relationship with your kids so you will have a good relationship with them when they are adults. Highly recommended.

Dr. Phelan gives concise, clear ideas about how parents should interact with their adolescents. Parenting books often fall into the trap of a "one size fits all" approach to parenting. Dr. Phelan acknowledges that adolescents often have different temperaments and may require varying types of parenting approaches.

Communication between parent and adolescent is a tricky thing. It is easy to stymie the flow of information. He lists several "dos" and "don't" that may help keep the lines of comunication open. He illustrates each of these points with real-life vignettes. He discusses general guidelines for when it is better for the parent to intervene; when to just let go; and when to seek professional consultation.

I am glad that this title is available in audiocassette form. Parents today are often busy with work, home duties and carpooling. A casette, or anything that is practical and saves time, is great.

The examples and clear language in this book really made it clear to me that sometimes, it's the parent who needs some attitude adjusting too.

"Surviving Your Adolescents--How to Manage and Let Go Of Your 13-18 Year Olds" is brilliant and simple. I whole-heartedly recommend it for any and every parent of teens. Dr. Phelan's advice is perfectly reasonable. There is a section called "Managing Testing and Manipulation" and great coaching on both understanding different perspectives and choosing what kind of role to take in various situations.

But parents beware, parenting teens will require you to grow and change! Dr. Phelan gives control back to parents all right, but it requires us parents controlling ourselves--old habits, maybe learned from our parents or born out of frustration. We are given a dose of reality about measuring what is really important (recognizing what is "minor but aggravating" and when outside intervention is necessary). In this book you will learn which very common behaviors we parents fall into that contribute to discord.

It's always good to know that you're not the only one going through the challenges of parenting teens and Dr. Phelan gives over his wisdom, advice, and experiences in a direct way with humor and compassion. If you are in need of some guidance in parenting your teens, get this book, read it (and don't forget to take some time to enjoy your teens).

Laya Saul, author of the best loved book for teens, "You Don't Have to Learn Everything the Hard Way--What I Wish Someone Had Told Me"

I am only on tape 1 of 4, it's what I've been looking for, a must have for all parents of teens, for all parents. We have been raised w/ old tapes and bad memories of what parenting is, as the child gets older we need to become coaches, not dictators. I highly recommend it!! Plus, I don't have time to read my eyes out!! the tapes are great!

If possible, this book is even more useful than "1, 2, 3 Magic", simply because adolescents are more trying to a parent than a toddler, if that can be imagined! I suggest giving this book to every parent on their child's 12th birthday. I have eight children and wish I'd read this book first.

Dr. Phelan has done a wonderful job at describing the right and wrong ways of approaching teenagers. I have recommended this book to my parents for many years. Too many times parents choose to discuss something on the spur of the moment, leading to blow ups and frustration on both parts. Dr. Phelan's recommendation to schedule a time and then also start with what is good, responsible, or mature with the teen before diving into the problem are on the money. This is exactly how they are trying to train business managers to work with their employees (although not all of them follow the advice). A collaboration to aid in the growth of the teen into a mature, responsible, relatively happy adult is needed. This book brings ideas and strategies to the reader to help reach that goal.

I wish I could have this book long time ago. If I had it, it would help me alot in understanding my daughter and I would avoid many mistakes. This book just opens your eyes and gives you the real picture of what is going on with your kid at the time of adolescent. I would say all parents need to read if before their kids become teenagers and be prepared for all changes and behaviour extreems.

Surviving Your Adolescents: How to Manage and Let Go of your 13 - 18 Year Olds by Thomas W. Phelan, Ph.D, 2nd edition is a book I highly recommend for parents of any teenagers. Dr. Phelan is a registered Clinical Psychologist who has worked with children and families for over twenty-five years and he knows what works to help families run smoothly, even in the roughest of times. In the book he tells what is normal adolescent behavior, and risk-taking is normal! He gives terrific ways to keep good communication channels open with your teenager while still teaching and modeling the behavior you hope for yet understanding and discussing in ways that are not a big turn-off, the behaviors the teen exhibits in natural rebellion to rules. These are the years when peers are more important than parents, experimentation is normal in the quest for becoming one's own person, but the pitfalls are many, and the book recommends excellent ways of avoiding these or working through them and still keeping a good relationship. He discusses what is abnormal and needs professional help also. The book is easy to read with excellent, practical suggestions of ways that work. By all means ORDER THIS BOOK NOW!!