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Swingland: Between the Sheets of the Secretive, Sometimes Messy, but Always Adventurous Swinging Lifestyle Hardcover


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Swingland: Between the Sheets of the Secretive, Sometimes Messy, but Always Adventurous Swinging Lifestyle + The Swinger Manual
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Touchstone (October 1, 2013)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1476732531
  • ISBN-13: 978-1476732534
  • Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.7 x 1.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (31 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #101,216 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Screenwriter Stern initiates readers into the world of swinging, sharing his experiences, often in graphic detail, and instructions—should you decide to enter into The Lifestyle. After a series of poor performances, Stern decided he needed sexual batting practice and joined a Web site for those seeking casual encounters. He recounts his first experience with multiple partners, which began with a chat about countertops and ends with Stern cutting his head open on a ceiling fan. Another encounter finds Stern the youngest by three-plus decades. He participates in a poker game to win sex with a woman and gives hilarious commentary on the competition. Stern provides advice for single men about being respectful to women and impervious to rejection, and about how to create the ideal online profile. He also includes tips for e-mailing potential partners, and outlines scene lingo—including the important distinctions between an MFM and an MMF experience, or hard versus soft swaps. Only an insider could describe proper sex club footwear and detail necessary topics of discussion before an encounter, as well as Lifestyle faux pas. Stern warns that participation in the Lifestyle takes Kevlar skin and a Chicago Cubs fan's constitution, but, if inclined, you will find no greater guide into its inner workings. (Oct. 1)

Review

"Transcends most of the usual boundaries of sexuality.…Leaves the vanilla world behind." (New York Times Book Review)

"Stern hilariously recounts his life in the swingers community…Equal parts memoir and guide book." (New York Post)

"Los Angeles screenwriter Stern penetrates the unconventional world of swinging… A unique, voyeuristic expose of a taboo bedroom counterculture." (Kirkus Reviews)

“Daniel Stern's Swingland is brave, funny, eye-opening, entertaining and well-written . . . everything one could ask, really, of a book about sex. But for all its titillations, Swingland is also something more rare: it is humane, and vulnerable. The book is a genuine delight.” (Matthew Specktor, author of American Dream Machine)

If you want to know your MFM from your MMF, your NSA from your GB and so much more, here's a man who's been there and done everything! Swingland is the erotic equivalent of a travelogue, Stern is an excellent X-rated tour guide through the often misunderstood world of swinging.” (Rachel Kramer Bussel, Editor, The Big Book of Orgasms)

"Swingland is everything you need to know about swinging, whether it's your thing or it isn't. Stern isn't trying to pull punches here. He's the real deal, and it shows. Especially in chapters like Synthesis, bedded down in a lovely little section called Intercourse. This book is a must-read. I also thought it was really funny that he says 'DON'T be creepy' in a guidebook to swingers. Brilliant." (Oriana Small a.k.a. Ashley Blue, author of Girlver: A Porno Memoir)

"Delightfully self-deprecating, and unrelentingly honest. Swingland offers an insightful glimpse into a strange sexual world." (Sam Benjamin, author of American Gangbang
"Daniel Stern navigates the naked frontier of consensual, casual group sex with a firm, polite grip. Never pedantic, Swingland shimmies like the mingling souls of James Brown (The Los Angeles Diaries) and Augusten Burroughs to the Boogie Nights soundtrack." (Antonia Crane, author of Spent)

"SWINGLAND is a seductive story about a mysterious subculture, but ultimately, it's about transformation and one man's search for his own naked truth." (Associated Press)

More About the Author

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Customer Reviews

Very funny and very informative!
jb28806
I look forward to Daniels next book, whatever it may be.
Christopher McCue
It was a great guide to learn more about the lifestyle.
Lou D300

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By xcitable on October 9, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Reviewing a book... is definitely more challenging than one may ever realize! While most reviewers would like to nosh on about literary style and function, I find this technique of little value to the everyday reader. So, with the common every day readers, such as myself, firmly in mind....I shall begin! Swingland was not only extremely informative, it was, by far, one of the most humorous books I have read in a very long time. I laughed till tears ran from my eyes! Daniel has an amazing ability to draw the reader right into the pages with him. I was riveted; I became an instant voyeur! His tales of both failure and conquest kept me turning the pages well past my bedtime!!

While the book may have been written to the single male wanting to venture into the Lifestyle, it has something to offer everyone... even the vanilla folks of the world. Daniel has stepped out on the proverbial limb to give the world a birds-eye view (voyeuristic pun inteded!!) of the very secretive world of swinging. Most of the vanilla world rejects swingers with abject horror, and for what reason? I believe it is lack of understanding! We simply fear what we do not understand. Swingland does an excellent job providing a new understanding of a subculture that that has been otherwise convoluted by gross misrepresentation on TV/Movies/Media. Perhaps, this book will be the catalyst of acceptance for the swingers that have to live in fear of rejection, or expulsion from their everyday social circles.

Pick up Swingland, travel the road of self-discovery with Daniel, and maybe learn a little about yourself along the way!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By jb28806 on October 15, 2013
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Very funny and very informative! I would have never known to bring a fruit tray along if not for Mr. Stern.

Plus, best reference to "Hungry Eyes" ever. Impossible to read the rest of that chapter without that as the soundtrack, which made it even more entertaining than it already was.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By ehoward29 on October 10, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
The cover with provocatively placed gummi bears immediately dispeled any negative taboo feelings I might have had about reading a book about life as a swinger.
The book balances being a manual for new swingers and a memoir of the writer's life as a swinger.
I enjoyed it immensely. Daniel presents the Lifestyle is such a straight forward, honest way that even my vanilla life was quite engrossed in how the Lifestyle works. Daniel presents himself as an everyman that most men can relate to and women are endeared to. So when we hear of some of the crazier exploits that he has experienced; we go with him on the ride (often many rides at a time) and laugh along with him.
I suggest this book to anyone who obviously is curious about the Lifestyle but also to anyone who wants to be entertained with wild stories. Just note, perhaps reading this on your Kindle at breakfast with your 7 year old son who is watching Magic School Bus can be a little uncomfortable. Take my word for it.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Weber on October 4, 2013
Format: Hardcover
"SWINGLAND" by Daniel Stern is a must read might, however might not be for everyone in the "Vanilla" world, but I highly recommend it. This self deprecating autobiographical/how to book into this world known as "The Lifestyle" is like binge watching your favorite show on Netflix like "Breaking Bad". You go from one chapter to the next as the story develops and you can't believe what is unfolding. It's a page turner and when one chapter ends you don't want to wait to see to see where Dan Stern takes us next. The writing, amazing references, and the glossary of terms transform the reader into this Lifestyle that by the end you feel like you have just been on one incredible "RIDE-ALONG"...
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Hattie D on October 22, 2013
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Stern's informative romp around the Lifestyle was a quick, fun read that had me laughing and at times squirming. The interactions between all his partners young and old had awkward moments that show how human this group is. There were insecurities, missed connections and solid relationships developed. I found myself cheering the author on as he blossoms from an rookie in the bedroom to a sought after partner in a group that finds the Single Male a threat. I highly recommend this to those who are simply curious about what the Lifestyle is, to those seeking to break in, to those experienced Lifestyle livers looking to see themselves in well written literature.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Jaymes2000 on October 20, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition
I loved this book! It was funny, and very informative. I learned a lot about the lifestyle from reading it. Highly recommended!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Christopher McCue on October 18, 2013
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Wasn't sure what to expect when I opened this book but, was very satisfied on how entertaining and informative it was. Daniels personal stories are fun, humble and put me at ease when reading. This book lead me down the path of how to start in this lifestyle and what I may expect. I think the rules given (especially about single men) are a must for anyone looking to break into this lifestyle. I believe this is a great read for anyone even those who aren't looking to swing. Daniel does a wonderful job of showing how fun, rewarding and sexy this lifestyle can be. This book definitely has put me at ease for some of my big fears of trying this for myself. I look forward to Daniels next book, whatever it may be.

Thank you Daniel for the words of wisdom!
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