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A Tale of Two Vikings [Mass Market Paperback]

Sandra Hill (Author)
4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)


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Book Description

May 2004

Has an eye for the ladies, loves a good fight. Splits his sides over rude jokes. Won't ask directions no matter how lost he is . . . even in a longship, for the love of Odin! Sound like anyone you know? Maybe every man you know?

Toste and Vagn Ivarsson are all that and more—a lot more. Identical Viking twins, they came squalling into this world together, rode their first horses at the age of seven, their first maids during their thirteenth summer, and rode off on longships as untried fourteen-year-old warriors. And now, having seen only thirty and one winters, they are about to face Valhalla together. Or maybe something even more tragic: being separated. For even the most virile Viking must eventually leave his best buddy behind and do battle with that most fearsome of all opponents—the love of his life.

--This text refers to an alternate Mass Market Paperback edition.

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

What do you get when you take two identical twin Vikings, pair them with some feisty ladies and throw in several large servings of absurdity and sex? The newest Viking romance from Hill (The Very Virile Viking, etc.). Although Hill is known for the fresh, funny, contemporary feel of her Viking romances, readers may overdose on the over-the-top antics she dishes up here. Exiled from their father's estate for their immature ways, Toste and Vagn Ivarsson have joined a band of warring Norsemen in Saxon lands. Just when they decide it's time to grow up and return to their country, a terrible battle finds them separated, each thinking the other dead. The lusty Vikings rebound quickly and soon find themselves chasing after the most unlikely women. Esme, Toste's shapely nurse/novice nun, heats his blood. Vagn, meanwhile, pursues hot-tempered Helga the Homely, the daughter of his Viking rescuer. Vagn lures her into bed many times over, despite her desire to be an independent woman, while Esme and Toste take turns tying each other up and having their way with each other. Each page is bawdier than the next, but Hill doesn't grant her characters much in the way of intelligence. Still, it's hard not to be happy for the "lackwit" Viking twins when they're finally reunited.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

*Starred Review* Two Vikings, Toste and Vagn Ivarsson, twins so identical that only a tiny birthmark differentiates them, find themselves in a battle to the death on their way to pillage a convent. Each brother believes the other to be dead, but each has been saved by a very different angel of mercy. Toste is under the care of Esme, a novice who doesn't trust men. After all, her own father and brothers keep trying to kill her for her inheritance. Vagn finds himself at the mercy of "Helga the Homely," who suffered years of teasing because of the nickname Toste gave her, and she's not real fond of Vagn, either. Once again, Hill has come through with a Viking romance guaranteed to bring on the giggles. Two strong warriors are surprised at the combativeness of women in the war of the sexes, and Sex and the City goes Norse as Viking gals conduct down-and-dirty, and often hilarious, conversations about men. Throw in a five-legged pig, a very odd order of nuns, and a troubadour who sings bawdy songs, and you get quintessential Hill--outrageous, side-splitting, funny-bone-tickling entertainment. Shelley Mosley
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

Product Details

  • Mass Market Paperback: 374 pages
  • Publisher: Leisure Books (May 2004)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0843951583
  • ISBN-13: 978-0843951585
  • Product Dimensions: 6.8 x 4.3 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 6.6 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,063,032 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Sandra Hill is a graduate of Penn State and worked for more than 10 years as a features writer and education editor for publications in New Jersey and Pennsylvania. Writing about serious issues taught her the merits of seeking the lighter side of even the darkest stories. She is the wife of a stockbroker and the mother of four sons. SandraHill.net

 

Customer Reviews

8 Reviews
5 star:
 (5)
4 star:
 (3)
3 star:    (0)
2 star:    (0)
1 star:    (0)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.6 out of 5 stars (8 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Funny as Usual..But..., October 29, 2004
This review is from: A Tale of Two Vikings (Mass Market Paperback)
I hated to give my favorite author four stars instead of five, but this story IMO was not like the others in that excellent respect. It was still great, but not excellent. What I mean by that is this.
It was two stories rolled into one book, told back and forth every few chapters she would switch. So in all, it was some 357 pages and each story got more of a 'short story' treatment. Each was about 178 pages or so. In all, it didn't seem like enough time to tell the stories of two Viking characters that belong in this long series.
These twins were introduced mainly in "The Blue Viking" and were fun and interesting, in their own stories, the only one I found interesting was Vagn. Toste was a little cold and aloof. For twins who would die for one another and felt each others pain and sadness, Vagn seemed the only one who was willing to try and find his brother and mourned his supposed death the entire book. Toste seemed more interested in sleeping with the nun who saved his life, lol.
Again, this is all my humble opinion. I almost wish Ms. Hill would've left them as secondary characters. This is the 7th book in this series and the series is still going strong with this entry being the least interesting. The great part? Playing catch-up to all the former main characters from previous books. The only missing ones were Rurik and Meg from "The Blue Viking," the 5th book.

Told each other was dead on the mangled and bloody battlefield, identical Viking twins Toste and Vagn each are saved separately and are in two different places and go on two completely opposite journeys to get home. Problem? They sense one another still, even though they are told the other is dead. Deep down they both must find out the truth before they can really live.
Toste is saved by a nun who seems to be in trouble with her father and brothers. He is so taken with her, he vows to help her no matter what it takes. The 'nun' isn't really a 'nun' in the sense, she has been at the Abby for nearly 15 years now and hasn't taken her vows. Her dilemma is that she tends to swear, break the commandments on occasion and has a desire for tall and gorgeous Vikings. So trying to dodge someone trying to kill her for her land and accepting help from said Viking, Esme is in trouble...
Vagn is taken in by Gorm, a powerful Viking who wants him to marry his daughter...Helga the Homely. Vagn is horrified. He is being held nearly prisoner unless he agrees. His problem? Helga is no longer 'homely.' She is tall and gorgeous. But a little on the independant side and thinks he is his big mouth brother who teased her as a child. Vagn is further perplexed when Helga tries to seduce him but wants no marriage, can he keep his wits?

Like I said, both great tales, but one was a little more interesting than the other. Vagn was a lot more warm and charming IMO and seemed to miss Toste a great deal. Helga was more fun to read with her insane schemes to seduce him. They had such passion and sympathy for one another, it was hard to miss, these two deserved an entire book to themselves.

Tracy Talley~@
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Go Sandra!!!!!!!, May 2, 2004
This review is from: A Tale of Two Vikings (Mass Market Paperback)
I love Sandra's Viking books! This is no exception. Toste and Vagn have been some of my favorite characters all along.

The twins join the Jomvikings and in a battle both think the other is killed. They have never been apart for long and both are devestated.

Toste is saved by nuns, one of which is Lady Esme or (Eat me) as Toste hears her name.

Vagn is saved by Gorm who wants Toste (mistakenly thinking Vagn is Toste) to marry his daughter, Helga, the homely.

Bolthar is along to entertain us with his wonderful sagas.

To many details spoil the plot, but you will not be disappointed.

All of our favorite characters are back to aid the brothers to find true love at last. Not without a laugh or two, or more.

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7 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Funny!, April 28, 2004
By 
This review is from: A Tale of Two Vikings (Mass Market Paperback)
The twin bond is never more strong than between twin Viking brothers, Toste and Vagn Ivarsson. It is almost more tragic than death for them to be parted, but in a battle they are separated. Vagn finds himself in the care of Helga who his twin dissed and ditched, naming her Helga the Homely. For once, he disagrees with Toste, finding her anything but, and desperate to convince her he's not the other brother. Toste, though believed dead, is not, but in the care of a novice nun. Lady Esme finds she has a lot more to confess, if that's possible, since the virile Viking came into her care.

***** Broad, slapstick comedy rollics across the pages as these two brothers learn how to be individual men and win their ladies' hearts. Esme's story is a bit more intriguing than Helga's, but on the whole, the novel will remind you of one of Shakespeare's comedies. *****

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Inside This Book (learn more)
First Sentence:
Toste Ivarsson slid in the soft earth and almost fell on his arse, to the amusement of the many warriors who surrounded him on their trek through Saxon hell. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
halting hand, bloody bell, bed furs, dower lands
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Tale of Two Vikings, Mother Wilfreda, Lady Esme, Sister Margaret, Father Alaric, Helga the Homely, Lord Blackthorne, Stone Valley, Holy Thor, Toste Ivarsson, Sister Esme, Sister Mary Rose, King Edgar, Vagn Ivarsson, Sister Hildegard, Bolthor the Skald, Sister George, Finn Finehair, Margaret's Mead, Blessed Lord, Sister Stefana, King Haakon, Sister Tostina, Fur Pelt
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