Customer Reviews

Talk Before Sleep

5 star:		(80)
4 star:		(23)
3 star:		(5)
2 star:		(7)
1 star:		(5)

 

 

Most books about women dying of cancer tends to be melodramatic, but not this one. Elizabeth Berg takes you on a journey between two best friends as one of them embarks on her final journey for life. Annie and Ruth became the best of friends after meeting each other at a party. When Ruth was diagnosed with breast cancer, Annie learns the meaning of love and letting go while Ruth handles her dying with grace and humor.

This is a book I would definitely recommend for friends to give to one another. Elizabeth Berg knows how to write about women ~~ how they talk, eat, live and gossip among themselves. This is a treasure about friendship. Men don't understand the connection women feel for one another ~~ how we need to laugh and cry during life's most stormiest times, and how we need our friends' love and friendship as well. Berg does a wonderful job drawing the readers into the private lives of the characters ~~ and you don't feel that you are standing on the outside either. You're drawn to Annie because of her nurturing, caretaker nature, and you're drawn to Ruth like a moth to a flame ~~ full of life and laughter.

If you haven't read this book yet, I would suggest you do so soon. Breast cancer is still the number one killer among women and though this book doesn't really talk about cancer itself, it does talk about love, friendship, survival and death. It is a book to treasure ~~ to pass on between friends, mothers and daughters.

After reading some of the negative reviews, I must wonder if the reviewers have ever lost a close friend to cancer. I lost a close friend two years ago to breast cancer. She was 43. This book, which I read about the time Sally, and another friend, were diagnosed help me so much during the time I, and other friends rallied around to support and help her.

What helped me the most about this book was the different reactions and ways that the different friends wanted, and could, help. Not everyone who cared for Sally could do the same thing, but we all loved her, and wanted to help her. We all had varied opinions of her progress, prognosis, what she should and shouldn't do about her family, etc. This book help me to realize that it is okay for people to feel differently about supporting and caring for a sick friend.

I suggested this book to many of my friends who were affected by Sally's illness. I gently mentioned several times during our discussions about Sally (we still have Sally get togethers to talk about her)that it is okay to feel differently about the things Sally, and we, were going through. That no one person was right or wrong, and that we all have the right to our ideas about how to deal with this devastating issue.

I am thankful to Elizabeth Berg for writing a moving story of friends dealing with a good friend's illness and death. I appreciate that some of the characters were not likable because, truly, that is the reality of humans. And, as her book shows us, sometimes we are unlikable because we are hurting, and in emotional or physical pain.

Just like Ann's family, my family too lost my care and attention at times. My times with Sally were sacred to me, and I changed my schedule to suit hers. But, this sacrifice is a real one many of us would make, and our own families can cope just fine.

From the diagnosis, to the denial, to the intimidating medical lingo, to the fear and unknown of dying, "Talk Before Sleep" is one of the most realistic pieces of fiction that I have ever read.

Beautiful, glowing, take-no-prisoners Ruth lives to the fullest. And then the unthinkable -- breast cancer, surgery, chemo and the exhausting fight to survive, a war waged not only by Ruth, but by her friends, Ann, Sarah, L.D., and Helen. Told through Ann, we see Ruth slowly deteriorate as the cancer spreads and she must face death head-on. This is a soul searching book that asks questions we would all benefit from considering. The questions go beyond the theological into the realm of self-examination. How have I lived? What would I do differently? How do I want to die? Am I living every moment? Ruth's pain is well expressed, but so is the pain borne by her friends. We see the agony and denial, the reality and the fear that the four women who love Ruth the most must endure as they try to support and ease Ruth in her final days.

This book is not just a depressing look at a painful death. It is a celebration of a beautiful woman who enjoyed life and squeezed what she could from it to the very end. It's also about the legacy and the spirit we leave behind. I confess I cried, something only two other books have been able to cause.

Very well done!

Ann is slowly watching her best friend Ruth face the most harrowing days of her all to shortened life. Ruth has been diagnosed with breast cancer that has spread to her lungs and has only a few weeks to live as the book opens.

The dialogue between the women is intuitive, intense and succinct like only Berg can write. Her portrayal of the oncoming death and the friends that sit in wait with utter dismay, grabbing at every glimmer of hope, is moving beyond words.

I really don't believe this author is capable of writing a bad book. You can't go wrong with any of her titles. ...END

I have read many of Elizabeth Berg's books but I must say that this one by far is the best. This is the love story between two women, not as lovers, but as friends sharing a special bond that only two women could have with each other. Ruth,one of the two main characters has been diagnosed with and is dying from breast cancer. Ann is her supportive, loving best friend. Berg writes in such a manner that the reader feels like she is in Ruth's house with Ruth and Ann, part of their exclusive friendship. The reader can imagine being on the jaunts with Ruth and Ann that they reflect upon throughout much of the story. Supporting characters are well-developed and integrated into the story in a believable manner. L.D. the somewhat "butch" friend has a strong, outgoing personality and says what's on her mind, but we are treated to the soft side of her soul when she rocks Ruth on her lap in a rocking chair because Ruth is too weak to sit up alone. Sarah, Ruth's boss is a sweetly feminine friend who is woven into the story probably to contrast with L.D, but who nevertheless holds her own as a supporting character. Finally, there is Ann. Who wouldn't want a friend like her? Though at times she seems a bit like a martyr, giving up time with her family (her young daughter Meggie and her husband Joe)to be with Ruth, Ann becomes a hero and the best friend we all yearn to have. The reader feels Ann's anguish over losing her best friend, her soulmate. This novel was so touching that I thought about it all day after I finished it. Elizabeth Berg writes from a very sensitive, caring, understanding viewpoint about a subject that usually we don't want to discuss. Berg allows us to feel and think what it must be like to know your days are numbered.

Truly wonderful short novel about two best friends, one of whom is dying of breast cancer and is near the end of her life when the story begins. This is a look not only at what it's like for the patient, but at how hard it is for someone to watch a loved one leave this world -- and not be able to do ANYTHING to stop it. All the feelings are here -- the guilt, the fear, the frustration, and the sorrow -- and they are so eloquently described that by the end of the book, you will be exhausted. As exhausted as the characters themselves. And this is what made me love this book so much -- it's so sad, it's so hard to read, but when was the last time a book moved me like this?

Berg says in the foreward that this book is actually based on her own experience as a friend watching a friend die from breast cancer and I believe it. Only someone who'd really been through it could make the rest of us feel like we had too. But this book isn't all about death and sorrow -- it's also about how bright someone's light can be, even in the face of extraordinary darkness. This book made me laugh out loud. And then it made me cry myself to sleep. How wonderful is that? Answer: darn wonderful.

I heard about this book from a friend who belonged to a book club whose members were all Hospice nurses. After reading it, I recommended it to all my friends. I've since read all of Elizabeth Berg's books, but this one is still my favorite. The characters and their reactions to a terminal illness are so real. This is one book you don't want to end. I highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoys reading about women, their friendships, and how they cope with loss and change.

Ann's best friend Ruth is dying of cancer. First it was found in her breast, then her lungs, then her bones and her brain. This brave story is about the courage of friends and how to assist someone you love, prepare to leave you.

Ruth gathers her friends about her, friends that leap off the page with their emotions and coping levels. I admired these women for their courage, for their ability to say the words that need to be said, to be able to drive their friend to cemetaries to pick the right one, without falling apart.

This book is beautifully written, so tender it had me in tears for so many of the pages, and for a long time after. Little innocent things like Ann looking at her daughter's shoes and realising that Ruth had helped pick them out with her, and she wouldn't be able to do that anymore. How huge the car felt after she dropped Ruth off at the airport.

A truly beautiful book about girl friends, how they support each other and how they can be jealous of each other. I recommend also reading "The Saving Graces" by Patrical Gaffney, and "What Girls Learn" by Karin Cook, which are both very memorable also.

The problem some are going to have with this book is the fact that they'll forget it's actually fiction. Berg's prose is so clear and real that this book is unnerving, but in a good way. I've read where other reviews have called this "gripping" and that's certainly the case. If you have to read any book this year, please make it this one. I would also recommend another great read, though it's totally different from this (why would you want to read the same thing in a row?). It's called "The Bark of the Dogwood" and it's very shocking and funny. Guaranteed to be like nothing else you've come across. Also try "The Art of Mending."

A friend presented me with the audio version after the death of a very dear friend from cancer. I experienced all of these feelings while assisting in her care. We shared some funny times and hard times. The lobster dinner reminded me so much of a meal I prepared for her. Many times I would prepare several different things because I never knew what she could or would eat. Often times she asked "who in the hell is going to eat all this food?" I cried and laughed all the way through the tape. Now I want to get the unabridged version of the book and/or tape to read and/or hear again. It is a wonderful story. Also, her range of friends reminded me of the different types of close friends that my friend had. And, yes, I even experienced a little bit of jealousy for a time, because I considered her my best friend and she often told me I was her best friend.