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Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success
 
 
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Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success [Paperback]

Steve Nakamoto (Author), Robin Quinn (Editor), Joe Kohl (Illustrator)
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (37 customer reviews)

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Book Description

April 24, 2008
Basically, I d like to find more ways where we can party with the chicks in the girls dorms, the author once said in a speech before a college election. That s really what we all want, isn t it? Uhh...I guess that s about it.

This is not the stellar speech one would expect from the author of a book called Talk Like a Winner. Steve Nakamoto shares his embarrassing communication failures and explains what he has learned and how he could have handled past situations differently.

Talk Like a Winner covers Nakamoto s twenty-one rules for successful communication by devoting a chapter to each rule. Each chapter gives a definition for the rule, personal anecdotes from the author s experiences, and exercises for improving proficiency in that particular area.

Some of the topics covered may seem like common sense, such as assessing a situation to determine the tone of conversation, and becoming a better listener so that everyone has a chance to speak. However, Nakamoto manages to provide tips and ideas that readers probably wouldn t otherwise think of trying.

The author has gained his current communication prowess not only by learning from painful mistakes, but also by stepping out of his comfort zone and approaching new situations with an open mind. He has received two Writer s Digest International Book Awards for his other books, Dating Rocks! and Men Are Like Fish. He was also a human relations and communications instructor for Dale Carnegie and Associates and served as a neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) personal development trainer for Tony Robbins for seven years.

"...It might be wise to admit what you don t know as well as what you do know about any given subject," Nakamoto says about choosing what to share in a conversation. We've all known someone who seems to know something about everything, no matter how obscure the topic. It can be annoying to converse with these types of people, but we might not recognize when we do it ourselves. This section of the book gives good tips for breaking annoying conversation-killing habits like these. Ending a conversation can be just as difficult as starting one. If you don t think about how to close a conversation you can inadvertently leave a bad impression. Nakamoto shares an experience he had with a professional volleyball player: ...I thanked the pro for his time and input. But what I remember most from our interaction was that he didn t reply to me by saying... You re welcome ... instead he simply turned and walked away from me. The book offers lots of useful tips, exercises, and techniques for those just beginning to explore communication techniques, rather than more experienced communicators. Some of the advice and tips are a little cliché, but the overall quality of the book is good. Talk Like a Winner is recommended to those interested in working on relationships and communication dynamics.


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Editorial Reviews

Review

Award-Winning Finalist in the self-help category of the National Best Books 2008 Awards, sponsored by USA Book News --USA Book News

About the Author

Steve Nakamoto serves as the dating/relationship expert on iVillage.com s Ask Mr. Answer Man message board. He is a former human-relations and NLP personal development trainer. Over the years, Steve has appeared on 220+ radio and television talk shows. He has also received two Writer s Digest International Book Awards for his other works, Dating Rocks! The 21 Smartest Moves Women Make For Love and Men Are Like Fish: What Every Woman Needs To Know About Catching A Man.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Java Books (April 24, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0967089352
  • ISBN-13: 978-0967089355
  • Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.6 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (37 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #70,551 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

My name is Steve Nakamoto, "The Friendly Voice of the Other Half" and featured expert on the DVD movie, Love Talk (Summer 2009).

I don't want to sound like I'm bragging or anything but here goes:

I am the author of the award-winning books MEN ARE LIKE FISH: What Every Woman Needs To Know About Catching A Man (Writer's Digest 2000 Nonfiction Book Awards), DATING ROCKS! The 21 Smartest Moves Women Make for Love (Writer's Digest 2006 Nonfiction Book Awards & USA Book News 2006 Best Books Award Finalist for Self-Help/Relationships category) and TALK LIKE A WINNER: 21 Simple Rules For Achieving Everyday Communication Success (USA Book News 2008 Best Books Award Finalist for Self-Help/General category)

Before becoming an author, I was a human relations/communication instructor for Dale Carnegie & Associates where I taught the principles of How To Win Friends and Influence People and Effective Public Speaking. I also had the honor of serving for 7 years as an NLP/personal development/Life Mastery seminar trainer for motivational expert Tony Robbins.

Over the years, I've appeared on over 230 radio and TV talk shows. And for nearly 6 years, I've served as the iVillage.com Mr. Answer Man dating & relationship expert where I've helped women around the world figure out the men in their love lives from an honest male perspective.

And while all of this may sound pretty impressive in print, I'm also just a regular guy trying to make a difference by sharing the truth as God has shown me. I hope that there will be a time and place where I can be of help to you in your quest for building stronger love relationships through better understanding and more effective communication.

Thank you.

With love and to your success!

Steve

 

Customer Reviews

37 Reviews
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3 star:
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Average Customer Review
4.5 out of 5 stars (37 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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23 of 24 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Solid Pointers, January 8, 2009
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
Too shy to strike up a conversation? Can get one started but cannot keep it going? Or is it that you are often putting your foot in your mouth? You'd be surprised at how many of us out there need help in basic communication skills. Steve Nakamoto, the author of Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success, is considered and expert in this area. Steve has been interviewed on a plethora of media outlets: television, radio, newspapers, magazines... But until now Steve Nakamoto has been considered more of a dating expert. He was previously the author of the best sellers Men are like Fish and Dating Rocks which shot him initially to fame and led to his career as the "Ask Mr. Answer Man" on iVillage.com. Steve has helped a multitude of women with dating and now he aims to open up the field with his sage conversation advice.

Steve's book focuses on the 21 areas where people often find themselves weak when it comes to communicating with others. Personally when I looked at the table of contents I thought "Well, if there are any areas listed here where I am weak, it is because it is an area that I haven't cared to focus on." But in reading the book I started to see areas that I thought before I was adequate and found that maybe I did need a little more work. Examples? Adjusting to get the listener more involved and controlling the flow of the conversation better to keep it from turning unnecessarily negative. The book is full of advice that, when heeded, will act as fillers to wherever you might have gaps in your skills. And in the areas where you might not have gaps Steve's advice can act as a reminder.

Talk Like a Winner was written in a way that if you already have a good idea of where your weaknesses lie you can go directly to the area in the book that covers the issue you might feel weak on, whether it be listening, smiling, responding or whatever, and you can focus on developing that part of your communication repertoire from the very beginning. Or you can do like I did and read the book from page one to the end and evaluate as you go. It is up to you really.

Steve Nakamoto's book was interesting to me overall mainly because I have always considered myself a fair conversationalist and have even considered that I get better with age because I feel more interested in others' life stories. When I was in high school I had even won awards for extemporaneous speaking at the Future Business Leaders of America conferences in my home state. But in reading this book I was reminded of one of the best conversationalists I have ever met in my life who'd been in the back of my mind for some time now. This person was a man named Jason Kulgelman and he interviewed people for Pacifica Radio. Whenever you had finished a conversation with Jason you always felt like some kind of genius because he seemed genuinely interested in what you had to say and he asked lots of questions and he complemented you along the way. In reading Steve Nakamoto's book I was taken down a notch. I realized when going over Steve's various points that it wasn't that I was so smart but more likely that Jason was a master communicator.

But I suppose this is the whole point Steve Nakamoto was making with this book. If you master the art of interpersonal communication and learn to talk like a winner, you will be more interesting to lots more people. They will go away feeling special for having conversed with you and you will go away feeling involved and enriched.
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Straight forward, simple, and right on track!, June 25, 2010
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
"Thinking steers your vehicle in life" is one of the quotes in this book that stood out for me most. My own personal issues with speaking have a lot to do with my brain just simply shutting down when I must speak to someone I don't know well. On a professional level I do okay, but in social settings I'm never sure what to say or how to say what I'm thinking--then my brain shuts off and I just don't say anything at all. This one simple quote put it into perspective for me.

Think.

That's really what this book is about. Each of Mr. Nakamoto's tips gives you a new way of thinking about things. It changes your perception of events and people and helps you change the way you then react. It all results in vastly improved experiences when applied in everyday situations.

I recently attended a convention where I was promoting my new novel, Presence: Awakening, and I was simply terrified at the idea I'd be speaking one on one with complete strangers. I took Mr. Nakamoto's book with me for a bit of support, and I applied what I'd learned from it. I'm happy to say that I walked away from all those discussions feeling confident and like I came across as comfortable and approachable.

A lot of his tips are common sense, and I knew them on a subconscious level, but seeing them in print and seeing them explained with examples help me put them into perspective and to compare them to my own life experiences.

Great job, Mr. Nakamoto! This is a very helpful book for those who struggle with everyday communication!

Charity Becker
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8 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Good communication skills made easy and fun, September 24, 2010
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
Talk Like a Winner is a friendly book that suggests that friendliness is always a good beginning, while you assess the expectations, interest and needs of others. It's an informal book with Steve's personal embarrassing stories for the what NOT-to-do. It includes considerations, followed by simple exercises to do on your own to build and polish your skills. There is kindness in his presentation as well as his intention.

Steve encourages you to talk to everyone for practice. I have no doubt it will make the world feel less scary. It's the Golden Rule elaborated in 21 ways.

"Except for the more serious circumstances, a warm and enthusiastic smile creates the best starting point for a mutually enjoyable conversation."(p.58)

Each chapter has a formula: Definitions and story, elaboration of main point, specifics of main point, how to look at own pattern, and ways to practice changing your old patterns whenever there's anyone to talk with.

David Carr, editor and writer, workshop leader, [...]
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Inside This Book (learn more)
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
unfriendly habits, powerful rule, greater intention
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
The Amazing Race, Las Vegas, American Idol, David Letterman, Larry David, Michael Richards, Johnny Carson, Peyton Manning, Taylor Hicks, Dale Carnegie, Shall We Dance, Los Angeles, Pan American, Master Communicator
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Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
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