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29 of 30 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Solid Pointers
Too shy to strike up a conversation? Can get one started but cannot keep it going? Or is it that you are often putting your foot in your mouth? You'd be surprised at how many of us out there need help in basic communication skills. Steve Nakamoto, the author of Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success, is considered and expert...
Published on January 8, 2009 by Gary Dale Cearley

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11 of 13 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Poorly written
I bought this book in order to learn strategies for more effective communication with others.

The book is poorly written and full of platitudes and poor examples. The author really needs to take a class in writing before putting out any more books. Every chapter is written based on a template, so each one starts referencing something in real life (the first...
Published on September 30, 2011 by Analysis


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29 of 30 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Solid Pointers, January 8, 2009
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
Too shy to strike up a conversation? Can get one started but cannot keep it going? Or is it that you are often putting your foot in your mouth? You'd be surprised at how many of us out there need help in basic communication skills. Steve Nakamoto, the author of Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success, is considered and expert in this area. Steve has been interviewed on a plethora of media outlets: television, radio, newspapers, magazines... But until now Steve Nakamoto has been considered more of a dating expert. He was previously the author of the best sellers Men are like Fish and Dating Rocks which shot him initially to fame and led to his career as the "Ask Mr. Answer Man" on iVillage.com. Steve has helped a multitude of women with dating and now he aims to open up the field with his sage conversation advice.

Steve's book focuses on the 21 areas where people often find themselves weak when it comes to communicating with others. Personally when I looked at the table of contents I thought "Well, if there are any areas listed here where I am weak, it is because it is an area that I haven't cared to focus on." But in reading the book I started to see areas that I thought before I was adequate and found that maybe I did need a little more work. Examples? Adjusting to get the listener more involved and controlling the flow of the conversation better to keep it from turning unnecessarily negative. The book is full of advice that, when heeded, will act as fillers to wherever you might have gaps in your skills. And in the areas where you might not have gaps Steve's advice can act as a reminder.

Talk Like a Winner was written in a way that if you already have a good idea of where your weaknesses lie you can go directly to the area in the book that covers the issue you might feel weak on, whether it be listening, smiling, responding or whatever, and you can focus on developing that part of your communication repertoire from the very beginning. Or you can do like I did and read the book from page one to the end and evaluate as you go. It is up to you really.

Steve Nakamoto's book was interesting to me overall mainly because I have always considered myself a fair conversationalist and have even considered that I get better with age because I feel more interested in others' life stories. When I was in high school I had even won awards for extemporaneous speaking at the Future Business Leaders of America conferences in my home state. But in reading this book I was reminded of one of the best conversationalists I have ever met in my life who'd been in the back of my mind for some time now. This person was a man named Jason Kulgelman and he interviewed people for Pacifica Radio. Whenever you had finished a conversation with Jason you always felt like some kind of genius because he seemed genuinely interested in what you had to say and he asked lots of questions and he complemented you along the way. In reading Steve Nakamoto's book I was taken down a notch. I realized when going over Steve's various points that it wasn't that I was so smart but more likely that Jason was a master communicator.

But I suppose this is the whole point Steve Nakamoto was making with this book. If you master the art of interpersonal communication and learn to talk like a winner, you will be more interesting to lots more people. They will go away feeling special for having conversed with you and you will go away feeling involved and enriched.
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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Straight forward, simple, and right on track!, June 25, 2010
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
"Thinking steers your vehicle in life" is one of the quotes in this book that stood out for me most. My own personal issues with speaking have a lot to do with my brain just simply shutting down when I must speak to someone I don't know well. On a professional level I do okay, but in social settings I'm never sure what to say or how to say what I'm thinking--then my brain shuts off and I just don't say anything at all. This one simple quote put it into perspective for me.

Think.

That's really what this book is about. Each of Mr. Nakamoto's tips gives you a new way of thinking about things. It changes your perception of events and people and helps you change the way you then react. It all results in vastly improved experiences when applied in everyday situations.

I recently attended a convention where I was promoting my new novel, Presence: Awakening, and I was simply terrified at the idea I'd be speaking one on one with complete strangers. I took Mr. Nakamoto's book with me for a bit of support, and I applied what I'd learned from it. I'm happy to say that I walked away from all those discussions feeling confident and like I came across as comfortable and approachable.

A lot of his tips are common sense, and I knew them on a subconscious level, but seeing them in print and seeing them explained with examples help me put them into perspective and to compare them to my own life experiences.

Great job, Mr. Nakamoto! This is a very helpful book for those who struggle with everyday communication!

Charity Becker
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Good communication skills made easy and fun, September 24, 2010
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
Talk Like a Winner is a friendly book that suggests that friendliness is always a good beginning, while you assess the expectations, interest and needs of others. It's an informal book with Steve's personal embarrassing stories for the what NOT-to-do. It includes considerations, followed by simple exercises to do on your own to build and polish your skills. There is kindness in his presentation as well as his intention.

Steve encourages you to talk to everyone for practice. I have no doubt it will make the world feel less scary. It's the Golden Rule elaborated in 21 ways.

"Except for the more serious circumstances, a warm and enthusiastic smile creates the best starting point for a mutually enjoyable conversation."(p.58)

Each chapter has a formula: Definitions and story, elaboration of main point, specifics of main point, how to look at own pattern, and ways to practice changing your old patterns whenever there's anyone to talk with.

David Carr, editor and writer, workshop leader, [...]
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars 21 Steps to Persuasive Conversations that Communicate, June 4, 2010
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
"Talk Like A Winner!" by Steve Nakamoto is unique in that it bridges the gap between the novice and the expert in the area of interpersonal communication skills. Steve puts it this way, "It's for someone who realizes that average skills equate to only average results at best, but greatness is reserved for those who work hard and smart at mastering the critical skills of life."

The book is made up of 21 key ingredients or simple rules for communication success with three suggested actions steps for each rule. (Choose, ask and reflect). These actions help the reader implement the material for more clarity, passion, and impact in their communication skills.

Readers may choose to read the book though for general content followed by a more concentrated reading of the areas of greatest interest or personal need, or reading it a chapter a week in a more thorough study. The organization of the material is user friendly.

The illustrations and cartoons by Joel Kohl add a significant and humorous visual re-enforcement to the contents of each chapter. I also appreciated to thought provoking quotations at the beginning of each chapter.

Bottom line: Talk Like A Winner! Is practical, informative, motivating, and entertaining, a great read and step by step guide to "Achieving Everyday Communication Success."
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11 of 13 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Poorly written, September 30, 2011
By 
Analysis (United States) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
I bought this book in order to learn strategies for more effective communication with others.

The book is poorly written and full of platitudes and poor examples. The author really needs to take a class in writing before putting out any more books. Every chapter is written based on a template, so each one starts referencing something in real life (the first chapter talks about luxury cars and how they have navigation systems), takes a couple of paragraphs, and then the last paragraph will say something like, "regardless of whether you drive a luxury car or want to be successful, you need a navigation system!" In another chapter it's, "regardless of whether you are in the NFL or want to achieve more, you can do it." First of all these stories have nothing to do with anything and are just space fillers. Next, I don't need to know that a car has a navigation system to know that I need a plan for my life. If this is what he wanted to say, he could have said it in 1 sentence, why take up several paragraphs? Besides this, if you've read one chapter you've read the introduction for every chapter so you're just wasting time. Some of the introductions are so contrived that you can tell he tried to fit some topic into his template.

Next, in terms of the actual advice, it's quite lousy. At one point he says that "you just have to go out and talk to more people." I don't think I needed a book to tell me this, what I was hoping for are STRATEGIES for talking to others, maybe something about content, or how to approach someone. Here and there he tells stories which I hoped would illustrate the point but the stories are so bad that it is not any better than the text. Eg, there is a story where he criticized his brother and the moral is not to criticize others. I think this is fairly obvious.

The author shows he doesn't know what he is talking about when he talks about great communicators to look up to. He gives a list of men that are good role models for males and women that are good role models for females. Now what does the gender of the role model have to do with anything? Is a male not allowed to have a female role model?? This shows Nakamoto's primitive view of the world. And as one of the examples of a good communicator he gives Sarah Palin!! I'm not sure how this slipped by the reviewers, but maybe there weren't any reviewers. The Internet is littered with videos of Sarah Palin babbling nonsensically; she is a terrible communicator and it's shocking that the author thinks she is a great communicator. For just a few (of many) examples see her response when a reporter asks her what newspapers she reads, her famous response about the bailout, her response where she contradicts herself from 1 sentence to the next talking about lobbyists in Alaska, ad nauseum. She is not even able to put together coherent sentences.

If you have no idea about how to act around other humans then this book could be useful but there are much better books like those by Lowndes and Dale Carnegie.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Powerful, positive, practical lessons in Communication!, May 6, 2010
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
Steve Nakamoto has created a beautiful little book that offers truly practical communication skills to anyone who wants to communicate more effectively. This book is a step-by-step practical guide written in easy-to-understand language that hits its mark every time. Every communication issue is covered and every effort has been made to offer real "how-to" with regard to any communication scenario. It sticks carefully to the issue of the reader's communication, teaching practical skills that can actually be applied to a real conversation.

Communication is one of the most important aspects of any relationship, but it is often seen as rather mysterious in that we often don't know what or how we are communicating. The author does a great job of bringing communication out of mystery by making communication into not so much an art as a skill.

If you are getting ready for a talk with anyone about anything--read this book.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Using These 21 Rules Will Make You a Winner, June 9, 2011
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This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
Talk Like a Winner is a breath of fresh air for those who just want to improve their casual conversations and the trained speaker alike as it serves as a great refresher course. Those who speak regularly may become guilty of falling into ruts as they overlook many of the basic rules of speaking and this book serves as a gentle reminder of the required applications. The key to success with Talk Like a Winner is to apply each chapter every time you are called upon to speak; whether it be one-on-one at a networking function, reporting before the CEO in a board meeting, teaching Sabbath/Sunday school or sharing the Word during church service, as an organizer of activities at your child's PTA/PTO meeting, and even at home with your spouse and children. Steve Nakamoto makes the reading fun and personal. He doesn't come off as a know-it-all as he shares many of his own personal mistakes. I enjoyed the cartoons at the beginning of each chapter that conjured up memories of people/situations where speaking mistakes could have or did ruin the moment. Steve's upbeat writing style separates this book from others in its genre and makes it a joy to read and re-read as a check against speaking mistakes. Once you have completed and applied the concepts in the book you will have no problem talking like a winner.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Practical and Useful, November 24, 2008
By 
Terri Cruze (Washington, USA) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
[...]

"Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success" is one of the most straight-forward and practical books on communication that I have read. In it, Steve Nakamoto shares his own personal successes and failures in communication to demonstrate ways to improve our own communication skills. He gives individual communication "rules" and shows, step-by-step, how to apply them in everyday situations to help one become an effective communicator. He also gives exercises in each chapter, to help the reader learn how to apply each rule.

I was impressed with the time and effort Steve Nakamoto spent explaining listening and nonverbal communication as well as what to say and not to say in specific situations. This is a well-thought-out and organized book, with very practical tools that each of us would do well to use daily. I was especially pleased to find a section on recognizing when others are not responding and how to regain their attention.

Through this book Steve Nakamoto taught me that by putting a little more thought into my habits when I interact with others, and by concentrating more on the other person than on what I want to say next, I can become a much more effective communicator. I recommend this book to anyone that is interested in improving his or her ability to communicate in everyday situations. I have already put many of the ideas into practice and am finding results now. Thank you, Steve, for this excellent book!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Practical Guide for Self Improvement, April 16, 2011
This review is from: Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success (Paperback)
The author has had the personal experience of being so insecure that he was "shaking and gasping for air" when required to do an oral report in front of a seventh grade class. From this beginning he rose to becoming a worldwide tour guide; being interviewed on over 200 radio broadcasts; and the iVillage "Mr Answer Man" relationship adviser (a sort of male "Dear Abby").

Upon reflecting on his own personal growth in building and maintaining relationships, Steve saw a need for a self-help book on the subject. Neither elementary and simplistic, nor wordy and complicated, this book was well thought out and arranged in logical steps of self-improvement.

He emphasizes the importance of working hard and smart to master everyday communication skills, rather than to "go with the flow" and be satisfied with mediocre results. He has identified 21 key techniques for personal communication that he calls "simple rules." Although the rules may be simple, they require dedication and practice in order to achieve your goals.

Steve's easy, breezy style of writing and use of illustrations of embarrassing moments from his own life add a personal touch and make this book enjoyable to read. The sensible suggestions are easy to understand and, with practice, can make a positive impact on the life of any person willing to read,understand and practice his suggestions--no matter what their age or station in life.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Get Others To Like & Respect You!!, March 8, 2011
By 
Jim Harrold (SARASOTA, FL, US) - See all my reviews
Steve Nakamoto's book,"Talk Like A Winner!", has the best 21 simple rules for achieving everyday communication success that I have ever read. This book is well written, and easy to read and learn the rules within.
My purpose for reading "Talk Like A Winner!" was two-fold; To be able to communicate with my grandchildren in a private manner. And, to be able to communicate publicaly at my Church and Social Clubs. After reading this book, I feel 100% more confident than before.
This book will help all ages communicate better and build strong and healthy relationships.
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Talk Like a Winner: 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success
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