Customer Reviews

The Talking Cure: A Memoir of Life on Air

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A great read. My usual complaint about memoir writing is that the author usually vents his/her sorrowful experience and solves everything with a neat literary ribbon. Feder doesn't do that. The honesty with which he tells his story includes the consequences of his fraility and, at times, self-involvement. Just when you think a situation is heading in one direction, life throws Feder a curve; something with which we all can relate. He writes about his mentally ill mother and difficult father without playing the blame game. Pick this one up, particularly if you're tired of big baby memoirs.

This is an awesome book, harrowing, but at the same time often funny -- hilariously funny, in fact, for Mike Feder is a master storyteller and, as this book demonstrates, a brilliant writer too. His material, the subject of his riveting monologues on stage and on the radio, is the story of his exhausting life - the nightmare childhood, the mental hospital incarcerations, the jobs that stand out as cameos of relief, the failed marriages, a brief, dizzying flirtation with fame - and, ultimately, his surviving the crash back to reality. The key to his miseries was his psychotic mother who, early on, is destroyed by a psychiatric system that doesn't really know what to do with the unhappy creatures dumped on it. Shock treatments seemed a shortcut back to normalcy, so they burned out her brain. Mike could never escape the little boy who grew up with that crazy woman, obsessively talking about it, not only to numerous psychiatrists but, especially, on his weekly radio program on WBAI-FM, when he pours his heart out to his listening audience, many of them, like me, who also had a history of mental problems and long years of psychotherapy. That is his true "talking cure." The climax of the book is his brief, fantastic success as a stage performer when the New York Times gave him a rave review for his one-man show, bringing Hollywood offers, and dreams of wealth and glory - all of which came to nothing and brought on his worst bout of depression -- that he only came out of when he met a truly nurturing woman at last. With no obvious marketable talent except his gift for talk, and living in a world where you are expected to be a winner, or at least support your children -- all the parents of his childrens' friends were moneyed professionals -- he has never sold out, kept true to himself, and chosen his own difficult path. It is that that his listeners love him for. And it illuminates every page of this book.

I'm not usually a fan of memoirs, but I read this in two sittings. Feder's compulsive honesty is fascinating. He doesn't spare anyone, least of all himself, as he tells the story of his failures as a husband (twice), father, and Hollywood schmoozer, and his success at one thing: talking. (Note to Mr. Feder: you are also an excellent writer.) Anyone who has worried that their dark side is too frightening to share with others will relate to this wonderful book. Also, those with bipolar disorder will find much to identify with. I was truly sorry when the book ended! I wanted more!

"Talking Cure" swept me in to Feder's "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and the ride was fascinating! After the initial gut wrenching chapters introducing his family and their view of the world, Feder enthralled me with his tales of the innards of alternative radio and the fawning over people in Hollywood and television land. The book reads like a novel with a the characters unfolding at a rapid rate. Sometimes there is a slight disconnect or unevenness between chapters; I want to know more but am moved forward to another place by the author. I liked the presentation, the often black humor and the candid tone especially about how difficult it can be to find competent psychological help. For those who feel any shame or privacy about their families or their own innermost thoughts and feelings, Feder provides a path through the looking glass that many can follow. I am sure that the basic argument of talking in therapy and/or drugs in therapy will continue to be debated as a result of this book. I recommend it highly!

This is a funny, bitter, entertaining and hugely compelling book. Though it is 382 pages long, I read it in about four sittings. I simply could not put it down. (I'm normally a much slower reader.) With this book, Feder has reached a much higher level compared with his earlier "New York Son." Whereas "New York Son" is a collection of loosely chronologically arranged stories, "The Talking Cure" is a cohesive narrative that builds slowly and comes to a profound conclusion. Feder views his family, his friends, his community, and himself with unflinching frankness and honesty. However, he is able to look at them with humor, sympathy and understanding. (I disagree with the reviewers on this site who imply that he is overly condemnatory of his ex-wives - he is both sympathetic and condemnatory of themselves and himself, and you get a real sense of why these relationships were wrong for everyone involved.) The people in his book are true characters with depth and verisimilitude, and he turns the lens on himself as much as on the others in his life. There is a subtle note of understanding that runs through the book - understanding of human limitations and need for self-protection - that gives the book depth and wins the reader over to the author's side.

Readers who grew up in the New York area, who know WBAI, or who have ever heard Feder's programs will have the added pleasure of recognizing much of what he talks about. (My parents were big BAI listeners as I was growing up, and we had Mike Feder on every Sunday morning in the 1980's.) However, anyone who has grown up, had relationships, had jobs, lived life, will be touched and moved by this book.

This is a wonderful book. I couldn't put it down and then when I finished it, I was sorry because I wanted it to go on and on. It's compassionate and funny and something anybody with a heart and intellect can relate to. I recommend it highly, great summer reading. I tell everyone I meet to read it. You should too.

Great book. Feder write's with painful truthfulness. It's funny and it's poignant. I reccomend it.

The author's first book (a collection of short stories originally performed live on his New York City radio program) was called New York Son. In terms of writing, it was an attractive and feisty little trial balloon that sunk slowly but gracefully just after it's launch and landed in the Hudson, just a few blocks from the author's home.

This new book shows the author in great form, his writing skills honed to a razor's edge--and beyond. I found I couldn't put the book down for a second--not even to eat or peform the most minimal of personal hygiene functions.

I laughed, I cried... Less than a week after I read this memoir of insanity, strange jobs, busted marriages, love, strange jobs and extreme behavior, I found that my own marriage had gotten better, sex had become a form of ecstasy undreamed of before, my joints no longer ached and I got that promotion and pay raise I had always wanted.

God bless Mike Feder for writing this book.

I reccomend it to everyone.

Mike Feder's memoir, The Talking Cure, tells about his sad, painful childhood and his desperate efforts to cheer his manic depressive mother. It also tells about his funny adventures working in a radio station. I enjoyed reading these chapters. I enjoyed less those chapters that describe his experience as a husband and father. He describes, for example, how he fathered children unwillingly -- because his wife was so eager to have them. In this section, his tone is self-righteous and somewhat vindictive. I wondered how Mr. Feder could have experienced such little personal freedom in his relationships after he'd had over fifteen years of psychotherapy. Sometimes, I suppose, talking is not enough. To his credit, Mr. Feder has had the good fortune to find women who have loved him -- no matter what.

I just finished The Talking Cure, and I don't recommend it. After almost 40 years of psychotherapy (talking), Feder is remarkably unreflective about his own failures as a father and husband. After talking to over ten shrinks, he still seems to feel his two previous marriages failed because his ex-wifes expected too much, didn't understand his artistic, selfish nature, and wanted children. Please! Is this fiction or what? Feder's narrative is moderately interesting when he describes his crazy mother and his crazy radio station, but it definitely bogs down when he describes his disturbed married and family life. The characters are flat, cartoonish. For example, there's the bitchy wife who doesn't understand him, and then there's Feder, his own long suffering, maligned hero. You wonder why so much talking to shrinks didn't result in greater reflection and sorrow about the damage Feder has done to his family and the people who love him. Maybe talking isn't for everyone?