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Talking To Yourself: How Cognitive Behavior Therapy Can Change Your Life. Paperback – October 4, 2008


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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

PRODUCT DESCRIPTION; Talking to Yourself: How Cognitive Behavior Therapy Can Change Your LIfe offers an effective approach to changing your negative self talk. It teaches you through a simple Five Step Method to create a life free of self pressure and self rejection. It offers you an escape from depression and anxiety and helps you to remain true to yourself when interacting with other people.

Talking to Yourself shows you how to: 1. Identify your negative self talk, 2. Assess what it is costing you, 3. Determine the underlying mechanisms of your inner speech, 4. Learn the language of self support, 5. Create an Inner Guide, and 6. Learn to tap into your Wise Mind by listening to your authentic self.

By using Dr. Butler's clear and well demonstrated techniques, you can change from a harsh Judgmental system to one of growth and self support. Start living your best life now.

About the Author

Dr. Pamela Butler has been practicing as a clinical psychologist in Mill Valley, California for over thirty years. She has extensive experience working with individuals, couples and families, helping them overcome the negative messages that have interfered with their happiness and success. Dr. Butler is also the author of the best-selling book Self Assertion for Women.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 180 pages
  • Publisher: BookSurge Publishing (October 10, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1419687433
  • ISBN-13: 978-1419687433
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.4 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.4 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (15 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,149,403 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

4.3 out of 5 stars
5 star
73%
4 star
13%
3 star
0%
2 star
0%
1 star
13%
See all 15 customer reviews
It was hard to get into the "material" with so many grammatical errors in this book.
Amazon Customer
This thoroughly updated edition of Dr. Butler's work reflects her ongoing research and professional expertise.
Penny W. Marston
Her writing is clear, direct, and packed full of easy-to-relate-to, helpful examples.
Marcia Fisch

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on October 27, 2000
Format: Hardcover
This book had many usefull insights but the discussion of the 'rescue process' had a profound impact on my life. Like the others that have reviewed this book I have given mine away because I know that it has the power to change lives for the better. I would really like another copy or six.
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful By Janet Harris on February 1, 2009
Format: Paperback
Dr.Butler's manual for confronting harmful inner dialogue is a powerful, positive lesson on how to change to improve your life. She explains how our negative thinking and attitudes can harm our mental wellbeing in very specific ways and how to change our thinking to positive, supportive attitudes. If we say to ourselves, "I'm stupid or clumsy or pushy" then that's what we believe and that's how we feel about ourselves. If we say to ourselves "I'm smart or athletic or compassionate", then THAT'S what we believe and we can FEEL that attitude. Dr. Butler has an natural intuition about how we function that is easy to understand and follow. I highly recommend this book.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Alan Salamy, PhD (Research Psychologist) on November 19, 2008
Format: Paperback
Dr. Butler presents a clear and lucid account of one's inner dialog and shows how this discourse influences one's behavior. She further offers a simple, logical, yet eloquent approach to change reactions to negative, hindering, or interfering language. The numerous examples provided are crisp and relevant to every day life. By integrating her extensive clinical experience with concepts drawn from a broad spectrum of pertinent literature, she seamlessly synthesizes an enormous array of cross-discipline information. In short, this is an excellent work.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful By Marcia Fisch on April 20, 2010
Format: Paperback
What I like best about Dr. Pamela Butler's book, Talking to Yourself: How Cognitive Behavior Therapy Can Change Your Life, is that it is really practical. The recommended, simple five-step exercise at the beginning of Chapter 5: Changing Your Tapes, to do "when drowning in a sea of judgments" is amazingly effective. Each time I tried it, I freed myself from a temporary painful, stuck, emotional state. I have implemented Butler's teachings into my psychotherapy practice. Her writing is clear, direct, and packed full of easy-to-relate-to, helpful examples. I highly recommend this book.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By The name is Mill, John Stuart Mill on September 1, 2011
Format: Paperback
I have read tons of self help books to get rid of my tendency to procrastinate when I feel stressed (I only procrastinate at certain emotional times). All of these books either had some interesting insights or were full of fluff that didn't help, but none of them cleared up my head like this one did.

This book allowed me to get to the ROOT of the problem: a negative self-concept fueled by negative self-talk. The exercises taught me to talk to myself in a supportive way--to become the supportive parent to myself that I never had growing up. This supportive self-talk is the foundation upon which all other success techniques can spring from.

The only thing I didn't like about this book was Butler's view on people's capacity to achieve certain goals. She seemed to advocate that people had limits, and sometimes they have to accept that. I partly agree that there are certain limits that you must accept in order to work around them--things like being born into a certain family, money given to you, etc. However, there are still a lot of things within a person's control if they work at it step by step, and accepting your limits too early can put you at a disadvantage if you haven't sufficiently tried to overcome them. Check out studyhacks.com for blog posts on deliberate practice's impact on "talent",etc.

Nevertheless, this book was still a gem for me. Rather than overly positive rah-rah self-talk (that can do more harm than good to some people), Butler teaches you to support yourself through supportive, yet realistic self-talk.

Her techniques are simple and easy to apply, yet they are profoundly effective!
Read more ›
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Janet Miller on December 7, 2008
Format: Paperback
Dr. Butler's book is absolutely brilliant and helpful. It is the most lucid and practical guide for those who want to be free from their "inner judge". She has a kind and compassionate tone and a no nonsense approach to what it takes to change ourselves.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Dr Geraldine Alpert, Clinical Psychologist on March 10, 2013
Format: Paperback
Though Talking to Yourself was one of the earliest self help books to teach Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, it remains one of the most straight forward and "user friendly" books of its type. I find that as much today as when it was first written, the patients I recommend it to , find it among the most helpful things that I suggest in our attempt to combat their destructive self talk. The Five Step Method provides a clear, concise way to turn one's inner critic into a supportive guide, and the numerous examples that are provided add tremendously to the clarity. I find the chapters on what Dr Butler refers to as Drivers such as "Be Perfect" and "Hurry Up", on Stoppers, which prevent us from living our lives to the fullest, and on Confusers, which distort how we see the world, to be particularly useful. Since negative self talk and mistreating of oneself results in many different kinds of emotional pain, Talking to Yourself is helpful for a wide array of difficulties including: depression; anger and sexual problems; overeating; and other self destructive habits. I highly recommend this book.
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