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Talking the Winner's Way: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Business and Personal Relationships [Kindle Edition]

Leil Lowndes
3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (38 customer reviews)

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Book Description

What is that magic quality makes some people instantly loved and respected? Everyone wants to be their friend (or, if single, their lover!) In business, they rise swiftly to the top of the corporate ladder. What is their "Midas touch?"

What it boils down to is a more skillful way of dealing with people.

The author has spent her career teaching people how to communicate for success. In her book Talking the Winner's Way (Contemporary Books, October 2001) Lowndes offers 92 easy and effective sure-fire success techniques-- she takes the reader from first meeting all the way up to sophisticated techniques used by the big winners in life. In this information-packed book you'll find:

    * 9 ways to make a dynamite first impression
    * 14 ways to master small talk, "big talk," and body language
    * 14 ways to walk and talk like a VIP or celebrity
    * 6 ways to sound like an insider in any crowd
    * 7 ways to establish deep subliminal rapport with anyone
    * 9 ways to feed someone's ego (and know when NOT to!)
    * 11 ways to make your phone a powerful communications tool
    * 15 ways to work a party like a politician works a room
    * 7 ways to talk with tigers and not get eaten alive (This last one is for when you need to WIN.)

In her trademark entertaining and straight-shooting style, Leil gives the techniques catchy names so you'll remember them when you really need them, including: "Rubberneck the Room," "Be a Copyclass," "Come Hither Hands," Bare Their Hot Button, The Great Scorecard in the Sky," and "Play the Tombstone Game, for big success in your social life, romance, and business.

Talking the Winner's Way is based on solid research about techniques that work!

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Leil Lowndes is a communications consultant whose articles have appeared in Psychology Today, New Woman, Redbook, and Cosmopolitan, among others. She has appeared on more than 200 television and radio shows.

Product Details

  • File Size: 520 KB
  • Print Length: 355 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0809225034
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Up to 4 simultaneous devices, per publisher limits
  • Publisher: McGraw-Hill; 1 edition (September 1, 1999)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #473,788 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

3.9 out of 5 stars
3.9 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
170 of 179 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Strong on technique, devoid of humanity March 1, 2000
I found this book interesting; I've tried many of the techniques and found that they work very well.
Unfortunately, the author has little genuine warmth, empathy or interest in other people.
One example (not untypical). The authors 'good friend' had started a business and Leil (the author) introduced her to an important - powerful - contact. The author's friend 'messed up' when she contacted the 'important person' - she didn't have a pen and asked him to wait a few minutes whilst she got one. The author's reaction 'that's the last time I'll introduce her to anyone'. Jeez - I'm glad she's not my 'good friend'.
I thoroughly recommend it to anybody who wants to communicate more effectively i.e. get what they want out of other people - respect, friendship, business, a job, etc.
However don't let it turn you into a self-centered, manipulative, jerk.
Remember that communications techniques can help in one off relationships (e.g. a job interview, sales call), can help lubricate new relationships (a first date), and increase your social standing (working a party, or social engagement).
They can't help in long-term relationships (when a date becomes your girl/guy, on the job, parenting, etc.) For that you need to invest in your character.
Happy reading
Afam Edozie
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67 of 68 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars What I learned from this book... April 13, 2004
By A Customer
One caveat, before my review... if you're dubious about buying this book because of the negative reviews (as I was, at first), then please consider this:
If you've read "How to Win Friends and Influence People," then you should already know the basic mental trick needed for how to be a great conversationalist. You have to wrap your mind around the fact that people don't want to hear about *you*. It's not what *you* say that makes people like you, but how interested you are in what the *other* person has to say. (After all, whose face do you look for first in a group photograph? Everyone else thinks the same way.)
Leil Lowndes didn't spend much time explaining this, like Dale Carnegie did; so I can understand why certain reviewers might have misinterpreted this book as "sucking up" or being manipulative. But take heart, friends -- her writing is delightfully NOT about petty flattering techniques (although there *is* a chapter on praise). (If you still don't see the difference, then consider getting "How to Win Friends," in addition to Lowndes' book.)
With that said, I'll admit that after reading Carnegie, I was still not a good conversationalist. Carnegie seemed to be a social person *anyway*, so being friendly came naturally for him. But myself, and others like me suffering from clinical depression / social anxiety / low self-esteem, will get much, much more from "Talking the Winner's Way."
Usually, when I'm at a party or at work, I'm paralyzed with doubts about how to act around other people. What do I say? What if I screw up? How the heck do I make banal "small talk" come out of my mouth without looking and sounding like an idiot? What about those horrible, awkward long pauses where conversation stutters to a halt?
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58 of 60 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Same book, different cover August 22, 2005
By xman
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I'll repeat what an August 5th reviewer stated : If you've already bought the book How To Talk To Anyone - 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by the same author then don't buy this book as it is the same. I bought both of them together and was really annoyed when I discovered they were the same. How can someone re-write a book under a different title without any mention of this fact on the book cover ?

You'll also note that Editorial review of both books is the same and have the same quotes from Larry King and McKay. Shame on Amazon for not giving me a full refund!
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35 of 37 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Same as her other book August 5, 2004
By pk
If you've already bought the book How To Talk To Anyone - 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by the same author then don't buy this book as it is the same. I bought both of them together and was really annoyed when I discovered they were the same. Am I the only person who has realized this ? How can someone re-write a book under a different title without any mention of this fact on the book cover ?

Either way I found both books to have too many tips related to business relationships whereas I am more interested in personal realtionships.
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16 of 16 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
This book is great. This could turn any shy person into the center and life of a party. Leil Lowndes gives great tips, and her life experiences to go along with those tips. Such tips as matching your person's mood. Being a "word detective", or parroting. I noticed that my brother, who is a very charismatic person (I'm not that outgoing), using simple tips found in this book such as parroting (repeating what the other person said, such as "I like this book", "What do you find so intresting about it") This technique alone can keep a conversation going, but there are still 91 more technique's in this book. You'll never run out of things to say.
I've read other small talk books, but this is the best one out there. It doesn't only teach you how to make first impressions, "pick-ups", or business chat, but also how to maintain conversations, and how to get that in-depth conversation.
The techniques in this book are great because whenever you think, "Hmm, what did she mean by that", she always associates it with her life experiences and then it becomes clear. With this book, you will NEVER run out of conversation.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars A good read
I recommend this book for business and relationships. Learned some great techniques to communicate with my colleagues from it. Read more
Published 22 months ago by merkjrk
1.0 out of 5 stars Great advice! ...for those born yesterday without common sense...
This book talks about most basic, common sense manners. If any of those "techniques" are new to you, than you either 5 year old kid that already knows how to read, or you were... Read more
Published on September 27, 2011 by mike
5.0 out of 5 stars Great read, great resource!
As a speaker and writer who interacts publicly and privately with people from many different backgrounds, I found this book very helpful. Read more
Published on July 26, 2011 by Terry L. Sumerlin
5.0 out of 5 stars What a great book! Pleasant surprise.
I just stumbled upon this book and read it without knowing of it, and was very impressed with it! So easy to read with short, concise chapters that each take a particular... Read more
Published on October 21, 2009 by Nancy J.
4.0 out of 5 stars Instant Results with Practical Techniques! Not Designed for Big...
This book is unique in its organization of almost 100 step-by-step tactics to improve one's communication. Read more
Published on November 23, 2008 by Andrew Chang: 7-Hour School Week and Health, Wealth, Truth
5.0 out of 5 stars A great handbook on Business Etique
The book is easy to read and very easy to apply. The techniques are sound and can make a difference at your very next business exchange. I highly recommend this book. Read more
Published on February 19, 2007 by Ronald Godlewski
5.0 out of 5 stars Great read
Great book to read and keep as a reference, totally enjoy what she had to offer, found the material excellent and very helpful.
Published on January 31, 2007 by Frank The Tank
4.0 out of 5 stars Tons of helpful advice if taken with a grain of salt
This is an easy and enjoyable read; I find Lowndes' style engaging, entertaining and instructive at the same time. Read more
Published on December 27, 2006 by Dennis Guilder
1.0 out of 5 stars Waste of time
This book is pretty pathetic. Writing style is cheesy and even ridiculous at times. Waste of time.
Published on October 9, 2006 by Kiran Pillarisetty
4.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic Advice-Lots of Substance
This book is a gem. The author offers a lot of tips and techniques on making the most out of social encounters. Read more
Published on August 1, 2006 by S.A.L.
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More About the Author

Leil has devoted her professional life to helping people become more effective communicators in business, social, and romantic relationships.

The passion she brings to her writing and speaking on communication skills can be traced to childhood when she suffered almost debilitating shyness which lasted right through college. After being a teacher for six years and still feeling socially insecure, she decided to leave the teaching profession and work only in situations which put her in constant touch with a wide variety of individuals. Here is a short history of how she gained her insights and share them with the world.

After working with elementary school children, she decided to take the first step toward her goal by becoming an international flight attendant to feel at ease speaking with adults from all over the world. Still shy in front of crowds, however, tried acting to become confident on stage in. But, although she was very successful (even starring in a Broadway show,) she wasn't satisfied simply speaking from a playwright's script. To become comfortable addressing large audiences with her own "script," she became a cruise director on ships traveling around the world. That exhausting experience of dealing with people almost 24 hours a day, she said, would cure anyone's shyness!

Between trips, Leil worked as substitute host on New York's #1 radio talk show. Interviewing celebrities and political figures is how she became confident talking to anybody about anything.

After decades of communicating with all types and ages of people, Leil decided to write and speak to groups to share her knowledge with the public. Leil now conducts seminars for Fortune 500 companies and speaks at conventions, but her favorite type of communicating is still one-on-one talking with people.

She has written ten books, many of which have been translated into 26 languages. The best selling ones include: "How to Talk to Anyone," "How to Instantly Connect with Anyone," Good-bye to Shy," "How to Be a People Magnet," and "How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You."

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