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Tangling with Tyrants: Managing the Balance of Power at Work [Paperback]

Tony Deblauwe (Author)
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)

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Book Description

February 13, 2009
2009 Winner Readers Favorite Book Award
2010 Winner Rebecca's Reads Literary Award
2010 Winner Reader Views Literary Award
2010 Winner Axiom Business Book Award

"Tony Deblauwe's approach to dealing with an abrasive, domineering boss is both insightful and inspired." -LAURA CRASHAW, author of Taming The Abrasive Manager

"Tangling with Tyrants offers hope and alternatives for people who may think quitting is the only option for dealing with a bad boss." - FOREWORD MAGAZINE

"This book is a terrific and practical guide to dealing with bosses, and demonstrates a remarkable talent by Deblauwe to understand where key elements of power are focused in the workplace." - BOOKREVIEW.COM

"Tangling with Tyrants identifies and explains dysfunctional relationship roles, what behaviors will adversely affect an employee, and actually changing the relationship dynamics with enduring, practical, applicable solutions." - MIDWEST BOOK REVIEW

BOOK SUMMARY
Do you dread going to work because of your boss? Quitting isn't always an option and feeling like a victim of a bad boss only robs you of productivity, job satisfaction, and power. Career strategist and workplace expert Tony Deblauwe has spent years coaching employees how to be more effective with difficult bosses, and he has compiled his experiences into this indispensable guide.

Tangling with Tyrants: Managing the Balance of Power at Work offers practical techniques that show you how to build a communication process that will turn things around and help you build successful outcomes. You'll get guidance on addressing direct and indirect bad boss behaviors, developing the right approach, and achieving mutually beneficial outcomes. By applying the techniques in this book, you will be equipped with the right tools to handle your boss and create the results you want.

Frequently Bought Together

Tangling with Tyrants: Managing the Balance of Power at Work + Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job + A Survival Guide for Working With Bad Bosses: Dealing With Bullies, Idiots, Back-stabbers, And Other Managers from Hell
Price For All Three: $46.88

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 132 pages
  • Publisher: HR4Change Press (February 13, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0984552774
  • ISBN-13: 978-0984552771
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 8.5 x 0.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,218,454 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Tony Deblauwe is the founder of HR4Change (www.hr4change.com) and has an extensive background working with individuals and corporations in the areas of organizational design, human resources management, leadership, and development. A certified coach, he received his Masters degree in Organizational Development and Human Resources from the University of San Francisco, and he has written articles for several trade publications including the Northern California Human Resources Association, Career Directors, and CareerSource magazine. Tony lives in the San Francisco Bay Area.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
A Fantastic Resource August 12, 2009
Format:Hardcover
I would imagine that at least once in a person's career he or she will be subject to a rather difficult boss. It has happened to me four times now out of four jobs. You take a job and are excited to start the work only to discover that instead of a helpful and supportive manager, what you're faced with is an arrogant person who constantly makes you question your own self-worth. It's a difficult work environment and one that is not conducive to productivity. Tony Deblauwe in his book, TANGLING WITH TYRANTS: MANAGING THE BALANCE OF POWER AT WORK, discusses what we as employees can do to resolve this painful situation. This book is quite the useful tool and is full of great information.

Sometimes, it's hard for us to imagine our workplace being any different than it already is. We accept the reality of the situation and, especially in today's economy, keep trudging along and attempting to make the most out of a bad situation. Well, Deblauwe's point of view is that we don't have to just accept a negative work environment. If our boss is what's making our working lives miserable, there are solutions to the problem.

Deblauwe uses his experiences to outline what negative behavior looks like, how it affects the employee and how we can find a suitable compromise and increase the quality of our work environment. This is probably one of the most useful parts of the book, in my opinion. Deblauwe is now just another "expert" coming in and giving his opinion. He been there and done that. He's worked in Human Resources and seen other employees in the same situation. Deblauwe really seems to know what he is talking about and infuses TANGLING WITH TYRANTS with his knowledge.

Afraid to pick up any sort of self-help book because you don't know if you want to invest the time and energy into reading it when you already have a ridiculously busy schedule? Well, TANGLING WITH TYRANTS is a short read at only 132 pages; it's quick and concise. What this does is allow the individual to read through the book in a reasonable amount of time and then go back and focus on the sections that may have the most importance to the individual. I loved that part. With a longer book, sometimes by the time I get to the end I am ready to set it down and move to something else. With TANGLING WITH TYRANTS, though, I still felt energized at the end of the book and was able to go back and reread sections that I really wanted to study more in depth. In addition, Deblauwe's writing is such that, in and of itself, it leaves one feeling energized. The words flow easily across the page and don't seem to bog the message down.

What really struck me as unique about TANGLING WITH TYRANTS was the ease of use the program seemed to hold. This isn't something where you're going to finish and be like, "Yeah right. That's really going to happen." Instead, everything Deblauwe discusses seems quite reasonable and I could actually picture myself trying his strategies while reading through the book. Aside from being information, TANGLING WITH TYRANTS is useful as well. If you're in need of a self-help book and are going to spend your hard-earned money on one, usefulness is definitely an important trait to look for.

TANGLING WITH TYRANTS definitely deserves a "Read it now!" rating. The information was informative and the strategies realistic. This is a book that anyone dealing with a tyrant for a boss is going to want to read. My thought was, why continue to struggle in a cruddy work environment? Why not do something to try and change it?
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
A very insightful, helpful book September 17, 2009
Format:Hardcover
Tony Deblauwe's approach to dealing with an abrasive, domineering boss is both insightful and inspired. He avoids the path of the typical "survive your bully boss" books by providing the reader with a process for analyzing the dynamics underlying tyrannical workplace behavior and then offers specific steps to deal with the situation.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
Having worked in the field of law for over 10 years, I've certainly dealt with my fair share of workplace tyrants! But, as much as I'd love for Tony Deblauwe to come live at my law firm in order to teach tyrant-management skills to my co-workers, his upbeat new book Tangling with Tyrants - Managing the Balance of Power at Work is an excellent consolation prize, providing forward-thinking strategies in dealing with the inevitable workplace tyrant.

Deblauwe has been a workplace strategist and human resource consultant for years, and his experience shows. Tyrants takes the reader step-by-step through a process of determining whether or not you work for a tyrant, outlining typical tyrant behavior and our reactions to them, and providing fresh strategies for dealing with said tyrant. As Deblauwe rightly asserts "You can't change the person but you can change your approach."

Deblauwe outlines both the direct and indirect methods used by tyrants. Direct methods (as anyone who has ever been terrorized by one will recognize) include criticism and belittling, micro-management, magnification of their own power while directly or indirectly threatening your job. The indirect approach includes passive aggression, backstabbing, and taking credit for the work of others.

Deblauwe discusses emotions in the workplace and why tyrant bosses can cause us so much angst:

We perceive negative behavior from our superior as a threat; not only to how we work, but to how work makes us feel. Our feeling of self worth is difficult to discuss because emotion has no place in most corporate settings...[the] perception is there is no convenient way for most people to effectively handle negative feelings born out of work situations without risking being labeled an outcast, troublemaker, or worse - not a team player.
So then where does this leave us? With lots of negative emotions and no appropriate place to express them, lest we risk a bad reputation or worse. Deblauwe provides us with common approaches of dealing with Tyrants, including the aptly titled Hoping, Coping, and Compromise.

What we need to do instead, says Deblauwe, is to change our perspective and that includes our assumptions about why the tyrant acts the way he does. "Learning to see past the behavior and understand the context of what may be fueling it is a critical change in thinking. If you remain stuck looking only at what's in front of you or how you feel, you overlook the reasons behind the behavior." Look at the environmental factors in the office. Is your boss' boss pushing him too hard, with unrealistic expectations? Is your boss perhaps overwhelmed by responsibility? Is he perhaps, albeit unwisely, simply mirror behavior that got results from managers for whom he worked in the past?

Additionally, instead of focusing on how we may feel victimized by the tyrant's behavior, we need to realize that we have control over our own lives, including the ability to improve our relationship with our boss.

Deblauwe outlines a terrific strategy he created called G.R.A.C.E. ©:
Grounding
Reframing
Acknowledging
Consensus
Execute

Basically G.R.A.C.E.© is an excellent step-by-step method of rewiring your thinking about your situation and dealing with it effectively.

While I fortunately don't report to any tyrants now, you can bet I will keep Tangling with Tyrants for the inevitable tyrant in my future. In the mean time, I'm loaning it to a couple of less fortunate co-workers who can benefit from Deblauwe's strategies right now.

A great read!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
IndieReader Review
Anyone who reports to a bad boss-or knows someone who does-understands the frustration and stress associated with the relationship. Read more
Published 10 days ago by Amy Edelman
Having a Stress Free Work Life - Having Ultimate Power - This Book is...
As I started ready "Tangling with Tyrants" I became aware of the magnitude the condescending and bullying bosses had on me. I just thought this was the way the work force was. Read more
Published 1 month ago by REB
Best Practical Guide to Dealing with Tyrants
I found Tony's description of Tyrant bosses to be invaluable in understanding and detecting behaviors and change of behaviors of Tyrants. Read more
Published 2 months ago by S. Yung
Tangling with Tyrants - Managing the Balance of Power at Work
Tangling with Tyrants provides a practical approach to handling bosses and colleagues who use their power position to discourage questioning and innovation. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Karen Colligan
Learn how YOU can create positive change and success
Obviously if you have a less than desirable work relationship with your boss then you must read this book. But it's so much more! Read more
Published 6 months ago by Jeanette P. Gallagher
Great book!
I felt Tony Deblauwe did an excellent job of portraying the difficult situations that people sometimes face in the workplace, often undetected. Read more
Published on August 6, 2009 by Edith Wharton
What every employee, HR professional, and manager needs to know
What I find fascinating about the framework that Tony provided is that it is practical and applicable to some of the most pressing issues in the workplace. Read more
Published on July 30, 2009 by Pierre Khawand
Tangling with Tyrants
In a market saturated with business management books, few stand out as necessary or crucial. While the subject of the "bully boss" is overlooked in much of today's... Read more
Published on July 28, 2009 by F. G. Stapleton
From soup to nuts: improving your relationship with your boss
This pair of books (reader and workbook), which should be used together, address the all too common issues arising from a stressful and unproductive relationship with your boss. Read more
Published on July 27, 2009 by David G. Mehr
Tangling with Tyrants an excellent resource
Everyone meets up with tyrants in the workplace -- bosses, difficult clients or those demanding peers. Read more
Published on July 20, 2009 by Debra Carpenter
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