Teenage as a Second Language: A Parent's Guide to Becoming Bilingual [Paperback]

Greenberg Barbara R (Author), Jennifer A. Powell-Lunder (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: November 14, 2010

What are you to do when your cheerful, friendly family members morph overnight into sarcastic, sullen, teens? How can you get through to these hormonally challenged strangers when all you get in return are sighs and eyerolls?

Thankfully, this book reveals the groundbreaking strategies you can use to maintain good communication, healthy interaction, and strong connections to your teen, no matter how rocky the road to puberty becomes. You'll learn how to:

• Let your teens help set the rules--and the consequences for breaking them
• Realize that "me, me, me!" is actually age-appropriate
• Put honesty above all else
• Try not to criticize, judge, or become angry

Based on the latest research, this book works as a Rosetta Stone to help you hear what your kids are really saying--and makes sure nothing is lost in translation!

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Barbara R. Greenberg has a doctorate in clinical psychology from SUNY at Stony Brook. She maintains a full-time private practice in Connecticut where she serves as the Adolescent Consultant for Silver Hill Hospital.

Jennifer A. Powell-Lunder has a doctorate in school/clinical child psychology from Pace University. She is the Director of an inpatient adolescent unit at Four Winds Hospital in New York. She is an adjunct professor at Pace University and maintains a private practice in New York.

Product Details

• Paperback: 256 pages
• Publisher: Adams Media (November 14, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1440504644
• ISBN-13: 978-1440504648
• Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 7.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #629,749 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Connecting with Teenagers October 30, 2010

By PM

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

From a grandmother who received her pre-ordered copy of "Teenage as a Second Language" - what a great resource for parents, grandparents, teachers, anyone who regularly deals with teenagers. The authors take often difficult, complex topics and deal with them clearly, concisely and concretely with sensitivity and a sense of humor.

The size of the book and the way it is organized make it easy to keep on hand so that it can be referred to when needed, which in many cases may be frequently! The authors offer very specific suggestions which are easy to follow, while also giving background information and insight into the "why's" of many behaviors. I'm sure this will become a well-worn, dog-eared staple in many homes.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Two Thumbs Up November 11, 2010

By Michael S

Format:Paperback

Loved it. Addresses the issues in a very practical manner. I came away from this book with ideas of how to handle actual situations. I have already recommended it to my parent friends and now I recommend it to you.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars From Sue Atkins Author of Raising Happy Children for Dummies March 2, 2011

By Barbara Greenberg PhD

Format:Paperback

As children approach their teens, family relationships go through BIG changes, and nothing quite prepares you for dealing with this process until now! Teenage as a Second Language: A Parent's Guide to Becoming Bilingual is a fabulous book aimed at helping you to understand some new ways to communicate effectively with your emerging young adult that keeps the lines of communication open, healthy and strong. This book really is very practical and down to earth and helps you to build the bridges, not the walls, between you as you enter this new phase of your parenting adventure. I highly recommend you rush out and buy a copy."

We received this review from SUE ATKINS AUTHOR of RAISING HAPPY CHILDREN FOR DUMMIES

Barbara and Jennifer

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Read for All Parents/StepParents with Teens February 4, 2011

By Heather (CafeSmom)

Format:Paperback

Are you the stepmom of a tween or teen? If so, you may notice that navigating these waters can be a bit tricky. One day your stepchild shares tales of their day, the next morning they serve you a grunt and a side of eye roll for breakfast.

Yes. We expect tweens and teens to be moody and challenging. But we also want to stay connected. Often we can feel like we are doing the right things but getting the wrong vibes. It's as if we and our stepkids are not speaking the same language anymore.

And the reality is, we aren't speaking the same verbal and non-verbal language. Our stepkids are talking teenage and we need to learn their language if we want to stay connected as we parent them through this confusing time in their lives.

Thankfully, there is a new book to learn how to speak, understand and converse in their teenage language.

Teenage as a Second Language: A Parent's Guide to Becoming Bilingual by Dr. Barbara A. Greenberg, PhD and Jennifer A. Powell-Lunder, PsyD has the answers that we stepmoms are desperately seeking to understand and keep connected to our teen stepkids.

And my favorite thing about the book is:

A Section for StepFamilies. YES! They recognize that blended families have different challenges. Chapter 6 is devoted to The Evolving Identities of Mothers and Fathers.

Personally, I love the section titled Stepparents: Shaking the Cinderella Complex. "There is no doubt that stepparents play an increasingly important role in the lives of teenagers," note the authors. Yes, we do and these authors not only acknowledge that but give us tips on how to grow our relationship with our teens.

I can't tell you how important this is when choosing a book to help with issues regarding stepfamilies.... There are a ton of parenting books out there but they are written for the parents - the ones who have that unconditional love from their kids. Stepparents have a different relationship with their stepkids and need advice that recognizes that relationship.

Advice for parents on how to parent their children is going to be different than advice for stepparents on how to parent their stepchildren.

Things I love about this book:

Informal style and set-up of the book. The book is based on solid experience and real-life research and interactions with teens and their parents yet it doesn't read like an academic journal. It's real advice for real parents and stepparents.

It decodes their non-verbals. Find out how to translate their non-verbals. The book decodes nonverbals as they pertain to certain situations. Door slamming, arms crossed, hanging around you quietly don't always signal negativity. Truly these sections of the book are worth their weight in gold.

Try this, Rather than this sections. The authors provide comparisons of how to handle different and difficult situations with teens.

What They See vs. What You See sections offers valuable insight. The authors explain the same situation as seen through your teens' eyes and as seen through the parents' lens.

Positive and encouraging. Love that this book is positive in nature. When reading it you feel empowered, hopeful and you'll have many AhHa moments! Reading this book will make you recognize all the things that you are doing right.

How to ask questions and get answers. The authors explain how asking questions the "right" way makes all the difference. They teach you how to have conversations with your teen where you are both sharing and your kid doesn't feel like they are playing "20 questions."

Self-standing chapters. Easy to read cover to cover and also great for a handy resource.

As I read the book, I kept saying Yes! Yes! and underlining like crazy. This book is the kind you want to dip in highlighter because you want to remember everything. If I thought it would work, I would sleep with this book under my pillow so that the authors' wisdom and tips would become cemented in my brain.

Teenage As A Second Language is the Rosetta Stone for the language of Teenager.

This book gets it and you should get this book. Seriously. In my commitment to bring you the best resources, I would be remiss if I didn't share this tool with you. You won't find it in the StepParenting Section of the Book Store but it includes wise wisdom for parenting and stepparenting your tweens and teens.

[...] Read more ›

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars The best book out there on how to communicate with your teen January 9, 2011

By A. Dolin

Format:Paperback

I just purchased Teenage as a Second Language and couldn't have found a better book on how to best talk to my son. He's 13 and is starting to give me the cold shoulder. I wasn't sure how exactly to engage him in conversation, but now I know! This book is FILLED with practical information on how to interpret your teen's words and non-verbal actions. Anyone with a tween or teen should own this book!

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Helpful Guide November 26, 2010

By Robin P

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

I found the book extremely helpful. I wish I had it years ago. I especially enjoyed the translating of teenager verbal and non verbal communication. The book is easy reading and made me feel that I am not alone in the frustration of relating to teenagers.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars This one's a Keeper November 11, 2010

By Duane

Format:Paperback

I think I will be using this marvelous reference for the next eight years, as my two kids negotiate the maze of adolescence. I thought my teen yers were tough, but I only had to deal with cliques and stuck up girls. Today's teens have to deal with Facebook, Texting, Twitter, and Beer Pong!! I need help, and this book is just the thing. It is clear, relevant, and fun to read. Most of all, it is reassuring. Every parent needs it or will need it, so don't leave Middle School without it!

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful! February 15, 2011

By Joanne Biles

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

This wonderful resource is already well-thumbed (and ready for a nice yellow highlighter)! As the mom of a tween and a teen, it validates and addresses many of my concerns as my children fully enter adolescence. A few weeks ago when my son challenged me on a matter regarding the cleanliness of his room, I stopped and said, "Let's discuss this later. I need to think for a bit." As I walked away biting my lip to refrain from losing my temper he called out "You're going to look me up in that book, aren't you!" Clearly it's taken up a prominent spot in my book pile (and clearly my child is frequently a step ahead of me!). Kudos to the authors for using their impressive skills as psychotherapists to help parents experiencing a communication gap! I look forward to using the ideas and recommending the book to other parents. I also plan to advise the local middle school and high school personnel to get copies!