The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting [Paperback]

Laurence Steinberg (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 3, 2005

Most parents do a pretty good job of raising kids, says psychologist Laurence Steinberg, but truly effective parenting means not just relying on natural instincts but also on knowing what works and why. In The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting, Dr. Steinberg distills decades of research into a parenting book that explains the fundamentals of raising happy, healthy children, giving readers an invaluable map to help them navigate parenthood from infancy to adolescence.

Dr. Steinberg found that the basic principles for effective parenting are simple and universal, and apply to all parents and children regardless of background. He explains each principle and shows how to put it into action, using anecdotes and examples: from "What You Do Matters" (parents make an enormous difference; children are not simply the product of their genes) to "Establish Rules and Limits" (how to provide structure in your child's life, and how to handle conflicts over rules) and "Help Foster Your Child's Independence" (help your child think through decisions instead of making them for him or her). Concise and authoritative, written with warmth and compassion, The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting is an intelligent guide to raising a happy, healthy child and to becoming a happier, more confident parent in the process.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Steinberg, a Temple University psychology professor and author (Beyond the Classroom), presents a powerful argument for the importance of parents in shaping emotionally healthy children. Steinberg's philosophy is based on decades of scientific research in the parenting field, and rests on 10 main beliefs that span childhood from infancy to adolescence. From "What You Do Matters" to "You Cannot Be Too Loving" and "Treat Your Child With Respect," Steinberg outlines the core ingredients of successful parenting, addressing common issues and questions all parents face. Although he recognizes the impact of peers and media in children's lives, Steinberg maintains that parents must take responsibility, pointing out that children's decisions are influenced, above all, by those who raise them. Steinberg maintains a thoughtful but instructive tone throughout, offering practical suggestions on topics like establishing rules and limits. Parenting, Steinberg says, is "like building a boat you will eventually launch. The building process is gratifying, but so is launching the boat and seeing that what you've built can handle the seas." Steinberg calls for parents to be involved and respectful as they create an emotionally healthy environment for their children. His slim volume brims with potent messages about the importance and responsibility of good parenting, providing useful guidelines for new parents and a valuable refresher course for veterans. Ultimately, Steinberg maintains, the scientific facts prove there is nothing more important to healthy development than parents who love, guide and respect their children.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Review

"Distills decades of research into a simple guide for moms and dads in the trenches."

-- Newsweek

"[Steinberg] helps parents apply the science of child development to their relationships with their children. It is warm, insightful, and eminently practical."

-- Lawrence Kutner, Ph.D., Codirector, Harvard Medical School Center for Mental Health and Media

"Steinberg offers sage advice as well as pragmatic steps to follow, in the hopes that you can learn to become a more 'mindful' parent."

-- The Boston Globe

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: Simon & Schuster (May 3, 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0743251164
• ISBN-13: 978-0743251167
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.5 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #67,359 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Laurence Steinberg , Ph.D., is the Distinguished University Professor of Psychology at Temple University. A nationally recognized expert on parent-child relations and psychological development during adolescence, Dr. Steinberg is the author of more than 300 articles and essays on growth and development during the teenage years, and the author or editor of 13 books. Dr. Steinberg has been a guest on numerous television programs, including Today, The CBS Early Show, Good Morning America, 20/20, Dateline, 48 Hours, Donahue, and The Oprah Winfrey Show. He is a frequent consultant on child and adolescent development for print and electronic media, including The New York Times and National Public Radio.

Visit the website for You and Your Adolescent, Dr. Steinberg's newest book, at www.youandyouradolescent.com.

Watch a brief video of Dr. Steinberg discussing the book.

Dr. Steinberg is available for speaking and workshops on child and adolescent development and family relationships. Presentations can be customized to suit the needs of the audience and sponsor. He may be contacted by e-mail, at [e-mail]

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars I've developed a lot of respect for this book, June 29, 2006

By 

Per Holm Petersen (Los Angeles, CA USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting (Hardcover)

My wife and I are expecting our first child, and even though I've had thoughts all my life about how I would parent, I thought I would get myself a real education, so I bought a lot of books.

I feel that most books have a lot of philosophies that I can't relate to, many overly focused on how to discipline and control your children, and how to make them live up to a lot of (in my opinion) arbitrary adult standards (how to make your 3 year old do her violin practice -- I mean this as a joke, but that's how it feels). There are so many things in society trying to shorten childhood, and I believe that forcing your children to do all these "adult" things makes them do everything out of duty as adults, and not ever really want to.

I also remember very clearly what it's like to be a child, and I would have been a lot easier if adults would have simply levelled with me. But somehow, most of these books seem to bypass the whole communication aspect. Don't get me wrong, the parent is certainly the parent, and should have the authority when necessary. But arbitrary authority has had an extremely negative impact on my life, and I believe I got a little screwed up because of it.

Anyway, enough about me. But I read this book with the prejudice of it being another book that is focused more on what the parents want than what the children need and helps them blossom as mature, solid human beings.

As I read this book, I suddenly developed a deep respect for the author. I completely agree in my heart with almost everything he says, and I've seen from other parents (friends/family) who parent much like he suggests, that this is absolutely the way to go. It creates healthier, more respectful, more loving, and more fun relationships. But I also appreciate how the book both gets to the point, at the same time as it never wants you to believe what it says "just because". In effect, the amount of information and wisdom in this book could easily have been padded to an 800-page whopper, which he thankfully didn't.

If the author is reading this, I want to personally thank you for this book. Very well done.

Thank you,

Per Holm-Petersen

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars An Excellent Parenting Guide, April 25, 2006

By 

Sherry Ellis - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)   

This review is from: The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting (Hardcover)

The 10 Basic Principles of Good Parenting is a must-read book for parents that have children from infancy through adolescence. The principles are based on scientific research, and are proven to work no matter what a child's background may be. Doctor Steinberg does an excellent job of not only explaining each of the principles, but also in giving real-life examples of how the principles should be applied. He also goes through each stage of a child's life and explains how to adjust some of the ideas to fit the psychological mindset of the child at that stage.

I found the chapters on establishing rules and limits, fostering your child's independence, being consistant, and avoiding harsh discipline to be especially helpful. I also liked Doctor Steinberg's "heads-up" on when the difficult and most trying times in a child's development would occur. These are the ages when the biggest changes occur in the brain - a "re-wiring" so-to-speak.

The 10 Basic Principles of Good Parenting is an excellent guide for raising happy children and fostering confidence in a parent. I highly recommend this book.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Indispensible, June 22, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting (Hardcover)

Finally, a book that covers it all and that rounds out the nuts and bolts type of child-rearing books like Spock and Leach. I found this book both reassuring and informative--my only regret is that it wasn't around when my kids were growing up! But I just bought 3 copies for my two grown daughters and son. Whether you're a full-time parent or working parent, this straightforward, concise guide will help you with all situations that arise in parenting and for every stage of your child's development. Essential if you want to do the best at the most important job you'll ever have (and the most rewarding!).