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The Bond: Three Young Men Learn to Forgive and Reconnect with Their Fathers Hardcover – Bargain Price, October 4, 2007

44 customer reviews

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Hardcover, Bargain Price, October 4, 2007
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

In this affecting follow-up to The Pact, Davis, Jenkins and Hunt (The Three Doctors as they call themselves) turn from their shared friendship to the more tenuous relationships they shared with their absent fathers. Focusing again on their childhood and youth, they each reflect separately on the effects of growing up fatherless in inner-city Newark, N.J. Whether missing lessons as basic as shaving or tying a necktie or as serious as developing self-confidence, all three conclude that they would have been more prepared for the obstacles they faced growing up if they had had a stable father figure. Instead, they had to turn to the streets for answers, which included distorted views of women and masculinity. The authors offer little new information about growing up without a father. However, some of their suggestions (find a mentor and realize fathering isn't just financial, for example) do bear repeating, and in the context of these three young men's lives, they gain further relevance. The book includes chapters written by the authors' absentee fathers, who, refreshingly, do not make excuses for their shortcomings but give insights into their failures-including their own lack of a father figure-and provide an understanding that humanizes them and enables their sons to forgive them. (Oct.)
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"The Bond is powerful, candid, straight talk needed to help mend our community fabric and strengthen our family ties. This honest and often poignant testimony from The Three Doctors is potent medicine that will heal and help fortify all readers."
- Cory Booker, mayor of Newark, New Jersey

"Doctors Davis, Hunt and Jenkins know how vital it is for all children to have relationships with both their father and their mother. Every parent should read THE BOND because it highlights the power of forgiveness and drives home the fact that it's never too late to be a family."
- Bill Cosby

"The Three Doctors pull no punches when they tell us what it's like to grow up in Newark, N.J, without a father in their lives: I grew up in that neighborhood, too. But they're not complaining. Instead, they did something about it-they reconnected with their fathers. THE BOND is the powerful story of how they did it, and it shows that it's never too late to be a father to your children. This is a book that every father and every family should read and take to heart. It's honest and brave and true."
-Queen Latifah, musician, actress, and author of Ladies First

"There is no shortage of statistics that bear out the anguish and pathology resulting from the absence of fathers in the lives of children, but The Bond tells a different story. Once again The Three Doctors have illustrated that none of us are bound by our beginnings and ultimately, even for black men, love wins."
-Tavis Smiley, television and radio host, author of What I Know For Sure

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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Riverhead Hardcover (October 4, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1594489572
  • ASIN: B002GJU422
  • Product Dimensions: 6.3 x 1.1 x 9.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (44 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,916,236 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful By Priscilla C. Johnson (Cilla) on November 25, 2007
Format: Hardcover
The Bond by the Three Doctors, as they are more affectionately called, is an extension of their first book, The Pact. In The Pact, Sampson Davis, George Jenkins and Rameck Hunt tell how they became friends in high school and ultimately, how they promised to stick together and graduate from college to become doctors. The Bond goes even further into the friendship of these three young men.

Davis, Jenkins and Hunt were able to become friends because of what is considered a growing epidemic in the African American community - children growing up in single family homes. Each doctor tells the reason why his father was not present in his home. They also give their fathers an opportunity to share their stories. They learn that their fathers either grew up in the same circumstances or they did not know themselves, the impact they were passing on through each generation. The doctors discuss how they struggled to learn about developing relationships with women, building confidence, and peer pressure and to learn a simple task such as how to fix a tie or picking out a suit without the guidance of male presence in their lives. They also discuss their devotions to their mothers, who sacrificed to keep their families together. Despite not having a male role model, the doctors basically learned from each other. The Bond tells of their need and desire to understand the reasons why their fathers were absent and what they have done to begin to build relationships with their fathers. Dr. Hunt stated "even though they missed out on a portion of their lives, parenthood last a lifetime".

The story was very compelling and thought provoking. The Doctors also describe the ways that they have set out to mentor other children who are growing up in similar homes.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By L. Hamm on October 18, 2007
Format: Hardcover
Sincerest gratitude for this book. It is a testimonial of strength and serves as a medium for these three men to honestly express their feelings of disappointment, fear, hope and healing as they each tell their individual experiences of growing up with absent fathers. It details how they felt as children, teenagers and currently as adults going through the process of understanding and mending these all-too-common broken relationships.

Giving men and women (young and old) this window to look through and see the obstacles that they overcame to become the three successful men they are today is a truly unselfish act. Hopefully it will inspire today's youth to persevere, seek out positive male role models, and show them that it is possible to push through the pain of the absent parent to achieve any goal that they set for themselves. Discussion about the book will hopefully lead to dialogues between mothers and fathers, men and women, boys and girls about what it is like to be raised as, and to raise, a child without both parents. I feel it is an unfortunate common thread that is hurting our minority youths. This book is definitely a worthy read for any person and definitely important to pass along to any male or female that may have dealt with this issue. Thanks again to Dr's Sam, George and Rameck!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Shbzz7 on February 11, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I just finished "The Bond" by the Three Doctors. It is a follow up to their well worthwhile book "The Pact" from a few years back. That book chronicled the story of three gentlemen from rough and tough Newark, NJ who make a pact while attending high school to see that each finishes undergrad, med school and become doctors. And they do. They overcome plenty of adversity, negative statistics and unfold a very very very inspirational story that deals with a lot of stuff that hit home for me coming from the not too distant inner city of Jersey City. That book should really be mandatory reading for all high school students.

Their new book, "The Bond" goes on to tell about the obstacles that they went thru to achieve their goal. Things like running out of money to attend the private and very expensive Seton Hall University and the fact that they really had nowhere to turn to because of non supportive home situations. These are just a few of the things that were left out of the first book. The doctors mentioned that the reason for these omissions was that they didn't want the first book to sound like the same old sob story, but instead focus attention on the very important pact between friends that got them through the rough spots.

The Bond could have easily been titled "Fathers". At times it becomes a serious study into the relationships between sons and fathers, or in the case of the three doctors, no relationship at all or the bare minimum. Each doctor has a strikingly unique story to offer about the relationship with their fathers and how this inherent negativity shaped their youth.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By C. Walsh on September 14, 2009
Format: Hardcover
I bought this book for several teenage boys in hopes that it would be of some assistance. They loved it! They all spent their entire weekend reading it and with no pressure from me. Surprisingly, instead of playing Nintendo/Playstation, they wanted to read about these three boys who made a pact to become doctors. I am awed by it's effect and I look forward to sending more copies to other teenage boys. This is definitely a winner!!
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