The Cannibals of Candyland [Paperback]

Carlton Mellick III (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: August 28, 2009

There exists a race of cannibals who are made out of candy. They live in an underground world filled with lollipop forests and gumdrop goblins. During the day, while you are away at work, they come above ground and prowl our streets for food. Their prey: your children. They lure young boys and girls to them with their sweet scent and bright colorful candy coating, then rip them apart with razor sharp teeth and claws.

When he was a child, Franklin Pierce witnessed the death of his siblings at the hands of a candy woman with pink cotton candy hair. Since that day, the candy people have become his obsession. He has spent his entire life trying to prove that they exist. And after discovering the entrance to the underground world of the candy people, Franklin finds himself venturing into their sugary domain. His mission: capture one of them and bring it back, dead or alive.

Cannibals of Candyland is an erotic horror story for the bizarro reader. Dark, disturbing, and absurd; this isn't the board game version of candy land you used to play as a kid.

Editorial Reviews

From the Inside Flap

Praise for Carlton Mellick III

"Another fine bizarro outing from Mellick III, with plenty of twisted imagery, sex scenes, and outlandish violence...CANNIBALS is a satisfying read for fans of the demented."
- THE HORROR FICTION REVIEW

"Easily the craziest, weirdest, strangest, funniest, most obscene writer in America."
- GOTHIC MAGAZINE

"Carlton Mellick III has the craziest book titles... and the kinkiest fans!"
- CHRISTOPHER MOORE, author of The Stupidest Angel

"If you haven't read Mellick you're not nearly perverse enough for the twenty first century."
- JACK KETCHUM, author of The Woman and The Girl Next Door

"Carlton Mellick III is one of bizarro fiction's most talented practitioners, a virtuoso of the surreal, science fictional tale."
- CORY DOCTOROW, author of Little Brother

"Bizarre, twisted, and emotionally raw--Carlton Mellick's fiction is the literary equivalent of putting your brain in a blender."
- BRIAN KEENE, author of The Rising and Dead Sea

"Carlton Mellick III exemplifies the intelligence and wit that lurks between its lurid covers. In a genre where crude titles are an art in themselves, Mellick is a true artist."
- THE GUARDIAN

"Just as Pop had Andy Warhol and Dada Tristan Tzara, the Bizarro movement has its very own P. T. Barnum-type practitioner. He's the mutton-chopped author of such books as Electric Jesus Corpse and The Menstruating Mall, the illustrator, editor, and instructor of all things Bizarro, and his name is Carlton Mellick III."
- DETAILS MAGAZINE

Product Details

• Paperback: 164 pages
• Publisher: Eraserhead Press (August 28, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1933929855
• ISBN-13: 978-1933929859
• Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.4 x 8.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (38 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #689,214 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Like a real world Kilgore Trout, cult author CARLTON MELLICK III has been pumping out some of the weirdest, trashiest, most imaginative books that you'll never want to admit you secretly love.

His books are released on a quarterly basis (every January, April, July, and October).

Best known as one of the leading authors of the bizarro fiction movement in literature, he is also one of the most prolific authors of his generation with over 40 books in print since 2001. He won the Wonderland Book Award for his novel "Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland" and has had short stories make it into The Year's Best Fantasy and Horror and The Best Bizarro Fiction of the Decade.

Although many of his earliest works are on the surreal and experimental side, his current style is to take the most ridiculous concepts imaginable and approach them with complete sincerity, as if they are not intended to be ridiculous at all. Always full of tongue-in-cheek humor, social satire, and told in a simplistic straightforward prose style similar to that of children's literature or early pulp fiction, Carlton Mellick III's work is one of a kind, to say the least.

He lives in Portland, OR, the bizarro mecca.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 17 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars The Cannibals of Candyland is SWEET! September 28, 2009

By Kevin Shamel

Format:Paperback

Carlton Mellick III says that the Candyland in his book, THE CANNIBALS OF CANDYLAND, isn't really the Candyland of the board game. He says there's "...no Molasses Swamp or Gumdrop Pass, nor any character from Candyland." He readily admits, however, that the game is indeed the inspiration for the story. He says so right at the beginning of the book. This scares the sweets out of the tiny child inside you the whole time that you read it.

Don't worry--the adult in you will have bouts of sweaty fright, too. The images of candy people biting into people-parts will flash across my mind's eye every time I see hard candy from now on, I'm sure.

This is a pure delight of a horror story. Boogeyman freakout to the extreme. The story follows a man named Franklin on his quest to prove that the candy people are real and responsible for killing his siblings when they were all children. And that the monsters continue to abduct and kill kids. It's what drives him in life.

Franklin ends up in the very secret Candyland. He even finds the horrible, sexy, insane, dominatrix peppermint strawberry woman that killed his brother and sisters. And she finds him. Franklin learns what it means to be a candy person.

This is one excellent book. Scary, riveting, interesting, funny, weird, and tasty. There are marshmallow animals, sinister little gumdrop critters, a ridiculously manly candy man named Licorice, and other horrible cannibalistic monsters. It's like a big bite of bloody cotton candy, or like licking a strawberry lollipop to get to the sexy center.

I've been reading quite a bit of Carlton Mellick's books lately. This is definitely one of my favorites. It's like a really twisted Hansel and Gretel meets Cannibal Holocaust with spicy-sweet sex the way only Mr. Mellick can imagine it. In Candyland.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars You will eat this up September 26, 2009

By Erik Smith VINE™ VOICE

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

Franklin Pierce has been obssesed with the candy people, ever since he witnessed one kill his brother and sisters. One night, he follows a candy person into candyland, and that is when things get really weird.
Don't be afraid try "bizarro" stories. Carlton Mellick III has a crisp, clean writing style; it's just his ideas that are weird, in the best way. The Cannibals Of Candyland is a strange ride through a world of candy coated flesh eaters. Franklin Pierce's trials and tribulations, as he tries to avenge his murdered siblings..., well, if you like something different, and definitely fun, read The Cannibals Of Candyland. You will never look at candy the same way, again.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars sweets for the not-so-sweet April 7, 2010

By D. Gorman "Crystalline Structure Moon"

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

this is the first book I read from this mellick dude, who was recommended to me by a friend. i was surprised at how well-written it was. simple prose with the sledge-hammer delicacy that reminded me of the late richard brautigan...sort of 'in-your-face-but-not-really'. seriously, his style is casual and laid back, but it gets harsh when it needs to be. he can get vivid when describing a cannibal eating a person alive, but he knows when to put down the dagger and pick up the quill. gruesome or intense when describing cannibalism or other 'enticing' human pursuits that require more than one participant, but he knows how to tell a story and tell it in a way that keeps you turning pages. speaking as someone who rarely eats human flesh, i found it a book that was real easy to 'wolf down'. this is an author i want to read more from. he has a good imagination and a talent for spinning a fine, if not sick and twisted yarn...i can recommend this book...it's a nourishing tale...for the cannibal in all of us.