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The Conscious Bride: Women Unveil Their True Feelings about Getting Hitched (Women Talk about) Paperback – December, 2000


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The Conscious Bride: Women Unveil Their True Feelings about Getting Hitched (Women Talk about) + Conscious Bride's Wedding Planner + 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married: Simple Lessons to Make Love Last
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Product Details

  • Series: Women Talk about
  • Paperback: 220 pages
  • Publisher: New Harbinger Publications; 1 edition (December 2000)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1572242132
  • ISBN-13: 978-1572242135
  • Product Dimensions: 7.6 x 5.2 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (76 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #36,250 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

From the Publisher

Those blushing brides deal with plenty of complex emotions before they make their way down the aisle. Anxiety over the planning of the wedding and stressful family issues, not to mention concerns about marriage itself, can make an engagement as much a trial as a pleasure. This frank look at a bride's inner life provides advance warning, support, and understanding for women getting married. Led by a counselor specializing in the issues of brides-to-be, a diverse group of brides share their true feelings about such issues as being given away, wearing a veil, changing their name, and closing the hotel room door only to find themselves suddenly - married. The author unravels the psychology behind common difficulties and offers practical advice for handling the fears and doubts that so often run amok as wedding bells take their toll.

More About the Author

I pioneered the field of bridal counseling in 1998. I have since counseled thousands of people worldwide through my private practice, my bestselling books, "The Conscious Bride" and "The Conscious Bride's Wedding Planner," and my websites, www.consciousweddings.com and www.consciousmotherhood.com. I'm regarded as the international expert on the wedding transition and have appeared several times on "The Oprah Winfrey Show", as well as on "Good Morning America" and other top television, radio, and newspapers around the globe. I live in Boulder, CO with my husband and two young sons.

Customer Reviews

I don't really need advice- I just wanted to hear I wasn't alone.
A. Maxham
This book helps get you to think about your true inner feelings before getting married so that when it comes to the actual day, you're stress & worry free!
L. Hanson
A great self-help bridal book to help deal with the roller coaster of feelings, emotions, and changing states of mind of the bride.
Danielle

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

79 of 80 people found the following review helpful By A. Maxham on February 27, 2001
Format: Paperback
While these 6 inch thick bridal magazines have ideas on wedding gowns, honeymoon locales, and bridesmaid dresses, this book is wonderful for the emotional changes that will take place as you prepare for your wedding. For me the single most valuable aspect of this book is that it is *validating*- that I'm not the only one who has experienced lows during this "happiest" time in my life. Through the use of other brides' experiences and quotes, this book validates the losses (e.g., place of Dad in your life), the fear of changes (loss of name, loss of single independence), the disappointments (the ring, the proposal, the absence of deceased loved ones), and generally the feeling of being overwhelmed by the giant Wedding Creature that seems to overtake your life. I didn't really get "advice" per se out of this book- mostly just the feeling that I'm not alone and weird if I experience a negative emotion as a I plan and anticipate my wedding. I don't really need advice- I just wanted to hear I wasn't alone.
As other reviewers have pointed out, the author does talk about losing one's "maidenhead" and the author does have a tendency to relate things to mythology. While another reviewer had a problem with the maidenhead section- I really didn't. For example, the author relates part of "maidenhead" to the loss (or potential loss) of one's maiden name. I'm an older (31) professional (Ph.D.) bride, and I've struggled with the loss of my maiden name and my identity (and whether I want to lose my name at all). The author even indicates that older brides may have bigger problem giving up a name that they've had, identified with, and used professionally for so long.
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59 of 63 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on December 6, 2000
Format: Paperback
I went to a bookstore yesterday looking for relief in a book about my post wedding angst. Viola! I'm in my second month of marriage and my husband and I are discovering why they say the first year is the most difficult. We're both definitely going through our own personal growing pains. Sometimes it doesn't feel like the "us" I've known at all. So, upon rapidly purchasing Sheryl's book and reading as much as I could squeeze in last night, I'm at least feeling more assured that these feelings are quite normal.
The word "therapy" has continually popped into my head since he proposed last December 30th. Fortunately, since I've gone through my share of self exploration, I felt I was equipped with enough tools to deal with my new emotions. And I do feel I gave them their due credence. I was told I was the calmest bride many of my guests had ever seen. And I did feel calm, serene even.
However, immediately after the wedding was over, I missed it. I felt it had slipped through time as quickly as Cinderella's carriage turned into a pumpkin. Once the wedding was over, I was off my "pedestal". What a crash. Princess syndrome aside, the post wedding reality of the "forever" commitment had propelled me into the depressed and freaked out state that lead me to the bookstore last night. "The Conscious Bride" book is just the affirmation I needed that I'm on the right track in realizing this is quite an adjustment both my husband and myself have taken on. I purchased two copies - my sister-in-law is engaged to be married in May. I'm sure she will be pleased to read it during her engagement.
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16 of 17 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on February 13, 2002
Format: Paperback
Upon hearing of my engagement (about a month ago), a friend of mine who was six months into her planning immediately wrote back to me and said, "I'm sending you this book!" I must admit, I still haven't finished it because I find parts of it ringing so true with things I wasn't even aware that I was feeling. I end up crying and needing time just to sit and think through what I've read. In recognizing that sad, angry, and upsetting feelings can (and perhaps even should) accompany engagements in addition to the socially-accepted pleasant ones, this book gives the reader permission to feel a whole range of emotions, all of which must be experienced to make the "transformation" from single to married complete.
In working life, I'm a Ph.D. clinical psychologist, and sadly have never encountered anything like this book in all of my training or experience- I have been praising it to friends and colleagues alike. This book addresses a very specific but very important issue, and I would highly recommend it to anyone - male or female, of any age - who is engaged and wants to better understand the often unrecognized emotional turmoil that can accompany getting married.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on March 27, 2002
Format: Paperback
First off, let me cut to the chase: this book has been a true gift! Two months away from my wedding and I was starting to feel miserable. Miserable? Huh? Yes, it's true. You can feel miserable right at "the happiest time of your life". Feeling sure this must mean I didn't really want to get married, I began to panic. Why all the confusion? Fortunately, this book was recommended to me. I think I began to cheer before I finished the intro. I am normal! This book helped me to see that there is so much more involved in getting married than what we see in the magazines. Sheryl Nissinen provides such clear insights into the complex emotions brides feel throughout their engagement and into the first year of marriage. If nothing else, this book allows brides to feel everything and not feel "wrong". Several times my jaw dropped in amazement, "she's in my head!" And several times I had to just sit and cry. I could completely relate to just about everything in this book and felt so relieved that so my feelings were shared by so many who have made this journey (and, yes, it is a journey to the altar) before me. I feel so much better prepared to meet my groom and to make the transition from single to bride to wife.
If you are engaged or newly married, read this book. I feel its insights are applicable to brides of all ages, but most particularly those near to their wedding date. Share it with your fiance if you desire. My fiance read a few passages himself and he was impressed with the sense that it makes. He said he never realized how deeply women feel this change in their lives. Cheers to Ms. Nissinen!
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