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103 of 108 people found the following review helpful
on June 15, 1998
I have read this book for the first time over five years ago. It is a book that one will refer to again and again. I happened to stumble across the book while I was shopping with a friend who was in need of some self-confidence and esteem. I thought I did pretty well at being myself but after reading the book discovered that I wasn't! The book was filled with so many lessons. After finishing the book I felt like my life was filled with so many unexpected & exciting blessings. You must be responsible to make yourself happy. Others can't do it for you. You are not responsible to make others happy. Give it a try! I wrote to Sue Patton Thoele and thanked her for permanently changing my life after I read this book!
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83 of 88 people found the following review helpful
on February 8, 1999
This book was extremely helpful to me in a difficult time in my life. I highly recommend it to anyone who is living under the terrible dark cloud of low self esteem, whether brought on by divorce or other major events, or by harms suffered in childhood from unfeeling parents or others. The author really appears to understand, and offers a kind and loving help for getting out from under that cloud and into the sunshine. It is filled with kindness and compassion, and will help you on your way to finding happiness again.
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46 of 49 people found the following review helpful
on May 9, 2001
I was very skeptical when I picked up this book but despite the inevitable self-help jargon, I have found it profoundly helpful. In fact, I am giving copies to all of my friends as gifts. The basic concepts are laid out in an easy to understand manner and the tone is kind and understanding. Lest it be too philosophical, there are activities to help the reader identify her own issues and success stories supporting each topic as it is discussed. I highly recommend it to any woman even slightly interested in building her self-esteem.
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53 of 61 people found the following review helpful
on November 6, 1998
This book is worth reading, but it contains no real helpful information except to "go get help". The author is a trained professional, and you do feel like you are sitting on a sofa but she is doing all the talking and not saying much. Perhaps my reaction to this book is because I had already read other books that went indepth on these subjects and she merely touches them. Sorry Sue.
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20 of 21 people found the following review helpful
on July 25, 2000
This book reveals how to grow and become emotionally secure. I love the defination for courage-'It is the ability to do what needs to be done, or feel what needs to be felt, inspite of fear. It is the willingness to risk or act even when we are frightened or in pain.' Invaluable book for anyone who has misgivings about themselves...
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18 of 19 people found the following review helpful
on February 13, 2004
When I separated from my husband with much self doubt about where I was going to turn for strength, I found this book. Along with the co-dependence of alcoholism, I realized my emotional co-dependence. Through the tools that this book has taught me such as setting my limits on my emotional well-being, I have discovered another way to communicate that makes me feel good about me.
The examples in this book from the author's clients are very valuable, and something that I really related to. I highly recommend this for anyone that wants to feel good about themselves.
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29 of 33 people found the following review helpful
on January 24, 1999
My mother gave me this book back when my relationship with my fiance was failing and told me to read it. At the time I didn't get the message, that I was co-dependant and needed to work to be strong myself. I picked it up two days after my fiance finally broke things off with me and read it cover to cover. It has been three days since I read it and already I can credit a remarkable change in my demeanor, attitude and thought processes thanks to the various anecdotes and exercises in this book. This book alone jump-started me on the road to recovery from co-dependancy such that I swear it gave me rockets for my feet. Many thanks to Ms. Thoele for writing this book and having it done in such a thoughtful, knowledgeable and easily-accessible manner. This will definitely be on my "To recommend to Friends" list. Simply wonderful...
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful
on June 7, 2011
This is the first time I have ever reviewed a book because this book is so enlightening and empowering. I got a PhD in a field that my parents chose for (forced on)me. I didn't like a job in that field and decided to stay at home to "develop a perspective on my career and life". As it turned out, I couldn't even perform the simple duties as a housewife (without child) well. I was feeling extremely useless and on the edge of depression when I found this book. I thought my situation was unique, but as I read the book, I realize that low self-esteem for woman has a quite common root: giving yourself away because of emotional codependency developed at a young age (on your parents) and carried into adulthood (on your husband). This book gives step-by-step instruction on healing those emotional wounds and resume your self-esteem. I found it work very well in combination with self-esteem boosting meditations(eg. Affirm - Affirmations for Self Esteem Guided Meditation). I'm really glad that I purchased this book, and I want to thank the writer and all the previous readers whose review gave me a nudge to purchase this book.
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23 of 26 people found the following review helpful
on March 9, 2003
This is simply a great book! I have read any number of books on women's psychology, spirituality, and health. This book continued to engage me chapter after chapter; rather than requiring a specific set of religious beliefs or adherence to the author's pet expressions, this book simply presents ideas and reasons behind behavior and emotions, along with examples of people (including the author) who have suffered periodically from lack of self-esteem and emotional strength. While a lot of the text relates to mothers and wives, there is enough that is relevant for women who are neither. I am recommending this to all of my female friends, regardless of how strong and confident they are - reading this is not and admission of weakness, but rather an understanding of where our weaknesses may come from and how to prevent them from impacting our lives in a very negative way.
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful
on March 9, 2003
This is simply a great book! I have read any number of books on women's psychology, spirituality, and health. This book continued to engage me chapter after chapter; rather than requiring a specific set of religious beliefs or adherence to the author's pet expressions, this book simply presents ideas and reasons behind behavior and emotions, along with examples of people (including the author) who have suffered periodically from lack of self-esteem and emotional strength. While a lot of the text relates to mothers and wives, there is enough that is relevant for women who are neither. I am recommending this to all of my female friends, regardless of how strong and confident they are - reading this is not and admission of weakness, but rather an understanding of where our weaknesses may come from and how to prevent them from impacting our lives in a very negative way.
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