The Daddy Shift and over one million other books are available for Amazon Kindle. Learn more



or
Sign in to turn on 1-Click ordering
More Buying Choices
Have one to sell? Sell yours here
Start reading The Daddy Shift on your Kindle in under a minute.

Don't have a Kindle? Get your Kindle here, or download a FREE Kindle Reading App.
Sorry, this item is not available in
Image not available for
Color:
Image not available

To view this video download Flash Player

 

The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared Parenting Are Transforming the American Family [Paperback]

Jeremy A. Smith
5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)

List Price: $18.00
Price: $13.93 & FREE Shipping on orders over $25. Details
You Save: $4.07 (23%)
o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o
Only 4 left in stock (more on the way).
Ships from and sold by Amazon.com. Gift-wrap available.
Want it Wednesday, May 29? Choose One-Day Shipping at checkout. Details

Formats

Amazon Price New from Used from
Kindle Edition $9.90  
Paperback, Bargain Price $7.20  
Paperback, June 1, 2010 $13.93  
Image
Save on Popular Books This Summer
Browse our Bookshelf Favorites store for big savings on popular fiction, nonfiction, children's books, and more.

Book Description

June 1, 2010
A revealing look at stay-at-home fatherhood-for men, their families, and for American society
 

It's a growing phenomenon among American families: fathers who cut back on paid work to focus on raising children. But what happens when dads stay home? What do stay-at-home fathers struggle with-and what do they rejoice in? How does taking up the mother's traditional role affect a father's relationship with his partner, children, and extended family? And what does stay-at-home fatherhood mean for the larger society?

In chapters that alternate between large-scale analysis and intimate portraits of men and their families, journalist Jeremy Adam Smith traces the complications, myths, psychology, sociology, and history of a new set of social relationships with far-reaching implications. As the American economy faces its greatest crisis since the Great Depression, Smith reveals that many mothers today have the ability to support families and fathers are no longer narrowly defined by their ability to make money-they have the capacity to be caregivers as well. 

The result, Smith argues, is a startling evolutionary advance in the American family, one that will help families better survive the twenty-first century. As Smith explains, stay-at-home dads represent a logical culmination of fifty years of family change, from a time when the idea of men caring for children was literally inconceivable, to a new era when at-home dads are a small but growing part of the landscape. Their numbers and cultural importance will continue to rise-and Smith argues that they must rise, as the unstable, global, creative, technological economy makes flexible gender roles both more possible and more desirable.

But the stories of real people form the heart of this book: couples from every part of the country and every walk of life. They range from working class to affluent, and they are black, white, Asian, and Latino. We meet Chien, who came to Kansas City as a refugee from the Vietnam War and today takes care of a growing family; Kent, a midwestern dad who nursed his son through life-threatening disabilities (and Kent's wife, Misun, who has never doubted for a moment that breadwinning is the best thing she can do for her family); Ta-Nehisi, a writer in Harlem who sees involved fatherhood as "the ultimate service to black people"; Michael, a gay stay-at-home dad in Oakland who enjoys a profoundly loving and egalitarian partnership with his husband; and many others. Through their stories, we discover that as America has evolved and diversified, so has fatherhood.

Frequently Bought Together

The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared Parenting Are Transforming the American Family + The Stay-at-Home Dad Handbook
Price for both: $26.46

Buy the selected items together
  • The Stay-at-Home Dad Handbook $12.53


Editorial Reviews

Review

Jeremy Adam Smith is a most purposeful father, a periodic Stay-at-Home Dad who sees his role as not just a choice that's best for his family but as a sign of a rapidly changing societal landscape. . . . His new book, The Daddy Shift, is a chronicle of a time that he predicts we will look back upon as the start of permanent change.—Lisa Belkin, New York Times

"A combination of scholarly research (citing economic and historical trends, sociological and psychological studies, and labor statistics), revealing profiles of stay-at-home dads and their families, and poignant anecdotes from Smith's own life. The personal passages are the book's most affecting ones, as Smith reveals himself not as some know-it-all superdad but as a learn-as-you-go parent who had to sort out his own complex feelings."—Regan McMahon, San Francisco Chronicle

"His investigations are very well researched, and he's pursued them with a rigorous intellectual integrity that makes his arguments engagingly persuasive. The result is an impressive book that even the childless should read, for at essence, The Daddy Shift is not just about stay-at-home dads, but about the changing roles of men and women in society."—Mothering

"A gentle but persistent appeal to get beyond all those preconceived notions and make the choices that work best for ourselves and our families."—Body + Soul

"Forty years ago, a man who wanted to share child care equally with his wife would have been called 'deviant,' and a wife who wanted him to would have been condemned as an 'unnatural' mother. The Daddy Shift shows how far we have come and how much we have to gain by completing this revolution in marriage and parenthood."—Stephanie Coontz, author of Marriage, a History: How Love Conquered Marriage

About the Author

Jeremy Adam Smith’s writing has appeared in Moth­ering, the Nation, San Francisco Chronicle, Utne Reader, Wired, and elsewhere. A magazine editor, blogger, and former stay-at-home dad, Smith lives in San Francisco with his wife and son.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Beacon Press (June 1, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0807021210
  • ISBN-13: 978-0807021217
  • Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 0.7 x 8.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 13.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,209,610 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Jeremy Adam Smith writes about parenting, science and technology, popular culture, urban life, and politics--sometimes all of them at once.

He is author of The Daddy Shift (Beacon Press, 2009), which the San Francisco Chronicle calls "amazing," author Michael Kimmel calls "impassioned [and] insightful," and the New York Times praises as "a chronicle of a time... we will look back upon as the start of permanent change." He is also the co-editor of two science anthologies: The Compassionate Instinct (W.W. Norton & Co., 2010) and Are We Born Racist? (Beacon Press, 2010).

Currently, Jeremy is a John S. Knight Journalism Fellow at Stanford University. He the founding editor of Shareable.net, where a series he developed and edited with the nonprofit news site Public Press won an Excellence in Explanatory Journalism Award from the Norther California chapter of the Society for Professional Journalists. He is also the former senior editor of Greater Good magazine, which was nominated for multiple Maggie and Independent Press awards during his tenure.

Jeremy's essays, short stories, and articles have appeared in Mothering, The Nation, San Francisco Chronicle, San Francisco Bay Guardian, Utne Reader, Wired, and numerous other periodicals and books. He has also been interviewed by many media outlets, including The New York Times, The Globe and Mail, The Today Show, The Talk, USA Today, Nightline, The Daily Beast, numerous NPR and CBC shows, ABC News 5, NBC News 11, and Salon.com. He is a regular guest on The Takeaway, a drive-time morning show co-sponsored by New York Times, BBC World Service, and WNYC.

He lives in San Francisco with his wife and son.

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars
(3)
5.0 out of 5 stars
4 star
0
3 star
0
2 star
0
1 star
0
Share your thoughts with other customers
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
2 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Stay at home dads: the bigger picture August 27, 2010
Format:Paperback
I met Jeremy while he was doing research for this book, which grew out of a group blog (Daddy Dialectic) to which he invited me and for which I have contributed for a number of years. Much of what is in "The Daddy Shift" is therefore very familiar to me, both in terms of its portraits of stay-at-home dads, and Jeremy's own attempt to think through the time he spent at home with his son. What has impressed me from the beginning is his insistence on fitting all of this into a bigger picture -- searching out the implications of the stay at home dad, not just for dads or men, but for women, for families (of all types), and ultimately for modern American society. The stay-at-home dad, for Jeremy, is a weather vane: it is not terribly common, nor is it likely ever to be so. It is a social indicator, a measure of our collective tolerance for new and flexible gender roles that arise at the interface of work and family life.

Every rare and gaudy species inevitably sits at the top of a complex ecosystem inhabited by larger populations thriving elsewhere in the food chain. Working women, dual-income families, and same-sex parents are all driving the same tectonic shifts signaled by the stay at home dad. Making liberal use of prominent social historians, Stephanie Coontz among them, Jeremy argues that stay-at-home fatherhood is but the most recent expression of long-term changes in American social structures, driven primarily by economic evolution and the changing nature of work. We learn that earlier periods of American history attest to episodes of unsuspected gender equality, that the urbanization of the 1890s was a much more unsettled time for the American family than is commonly understood, and that this notion of gender equality paradoxically began to spread in the early 20th century, before the patriarchal model of "Father Knows Best" displaced it, becoming canonical after World War II. All of this is blended, in chapters of accessible length, with first-person anecdotes from contemporary stay at home dads.

Jeremy's book is an impressive work of synthesis, pulling together expert knowledge from a range of fields -- at just the right time, to say just the right thing -- about something that is affecting the lives of more and more people. There is a growing body of popular literature on male parenting, as there is scattered social scientific research on the subject, but Jeremy's book is virtually alone in presenting a humane, readable, and very smart investigation of just what it means for all of us, in the bigger picture.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
2 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A "New Deal" for Dads August 23, 2010
Format:Paperback
The evolution of fatherhood from "hunter-gatherer" to "lover-nurturer" has accelerated in recent years, and no one has documented this change more thoroughly and engagingly than Jeremy Adam Smith. In "The Daddy Shift" he surrounds heart-warming anecdotes of being a stay-at-home Dad for his son with solid reporting about the social and economic forces that are transforming fatherhood and American families in every demographic group. This is a big-hearted and important book about a trend that has the potential of changing our society in a very positive way.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
Format:Paperback
Very interesting book about one man's journey to becoming a real dad. Jeremy does a great job describing with candor the process he went through as his son was born (when he was a remote observer), to taking over care of his child from his wife later that year (or the next) (when she returned to work) and struggling with finding a way to soothe and care for the baby, to a final, very moving passage where his wife is out-of-town for a week and he realizes he can take care of his son all by himself.

He does a great job looking at the hidden underside of cultures like Kansas City, where religion is taken very seriously (and most religious people are Catholics and Southern Baptist, very patriarchal, male authoritarian, ego-centric religions where men are encouraged to take little responsibility for the unpaid work of taking care of the children they bring into the world), but where there is also one of the the largest caregiving dads' groups in the country.

He also does a great job looking at other issues, such as the conflicts that people can run into with parents when they set up their family differently. This seems particularly annoying to have to deal with when your parents' family set-up did not work, and there was a divorce, yet when you try to do something more functional this is criticized.

And he tackles gender essentialists arguments well. I think there is even more of a case there to be made that human beings, with our very long time to reach maturity outside the womb relative to the time in the womb (there is nothing anything close to this ratio in any other species), could never have evolved from primates without men doing a lot of child care, carrying children around, feeding them, teaching them things, tending them, etc. It may be only because paternity was not provable that everything became so distorted. Also, there are some important biological clock issues for men in the genetic deterioration of sperm as men age that are worth looking at (these have only begun to become an issue of scientific study in the last few decades after paternity became provable in the 1970s).

My only reservation is his last chapter where he offers prescriptions. I think he may not realize some features of our current federal tax and benefits system that work against 2-earner, 2-parent families and require them to transfer income and benefits to sole breadwinners with stay-at-home spouses. While he advocates a model like that of the Scandinavian countries, some people may not realize there is a moral hazard when you socialize the cost of something such as having a child; this can encourage both men and women to have a child when they don't really want one and haven't done the preparation needed; this is not fair to the child. Moreover, it can hide how expensive it is to raise a child (both personally and financially) and the responsibility that both parents need to take for this; this is also not fair to the child. While there are also substantial moral hazard problems in the right wing patriarchal model of male resource control and female exclusion from fundamental rights and the economy that may outweigh these moral hazards of the center-left solutions, ideally we would get rid of the moral hazard problem altogether.

I think there is a way to address this in the context of our current system by culling back some of the subsidy that 2-earner families have to pay to sole breadwinner families, perhaps by allowing a family where both parents pay payroll taxes to take a portion of their benefit in the form of paid FMLA during the first year of a child's life (or adoption by the parents). Sole breadwinner families also need to be charged higher taxes to reflect the extra benefits they draw and to prevent the economic externalities they cause to 2-earner/2-parent families and to future generations and which are often unfunded and borrowed. There is also a problem where we fictionalize earnings of married couples and the individual salaries are amalgamated in the joint federal return; the accounting for this means that the lower earner in the couple pays the highest tax rate for the couple and often loses the benefits of credits or deductions that that taxpayer pays (they tend to get transferred, accounting-wise, 100% to the higher earner even if s/he is not the one personally paying all of them). Most other OECD countries have left this practice behind because it is an economic fiction that is very distorting to family decision-making and economic productivity. Also, there is a problem in our system where higher wage earners are required to subsidize lower wage earners in programs like Social Security (and in some of the state parental leave insurance programs, like California's) but there is no requirement that property/capital-based earners subsidize low wage worker's benefits. This is a triangulated moral hazard problem that falls directly to hurt children. The programs either need to be converted to more conventional social insurance programs (without the subsidy) or a property/capital-earner tax needs to be added.

In general, though, I thought it was a fantastic book and a great contribution. Thank you for writing it.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
Search Customer Reviews
Only search this product's reviews

What Other Items Do Customers Buy After Viewing This Item?


Forums

There are no discussions about this product yet.
Be the first to discuss this product with the community.
Start a new discussion
Topic:
First post:
Prompts for sign-in
 



So You'd Like to...


Create a guide


Look for Similar Items by Category