I read Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Drinking with a critical, but hopeful open mind. I wanted to believe that just by reading this book that he would convince me to give up drinking without regret, and without the need to use willpower. I liked that I didn't have to give up drinking during the book. That gave me some time to put off that dreadful day.
I read steadily, but had no desire to finish it in record time. I was always sober when I read it, but always looked forward to my nightly ritual of beer and scotch and falling asleep on the couch. His book really spoke to my personal situation. However, I began to dread getting to the end, but also wanted to get to the end to get the magic instructions. I read the rules to agree by before going on. I wasn't sure I agreed with them 100%. I tried rereading some chapters that really spoke to me. I read the instructions. They seemed common sense. I didn't think that was going to do it for me. I read the chapter on the final drink. A little disappointed, I went home to have my final drink. I couldn't have just one. I had my usual, and felt the usual in the morning. It sucked.
The next day I picked up the book again and started reading. I reread the instructions. I reread some chapters.
I kept reading the book, finding a lot of solace in breaking false drinking associations, and reminding myself daily that alcohol ravages time, energy, love, and money. Four things we can never have enough of. I made a habit of reminding myself of how great it is that I am free. I will not mourn the drink, nor envy those who drink.
I am wary that I may eventually let my guard down, and enjoy reading a chapter or two again to reinforce my decision. I will also say that those who like AA, may not like this book, as it is counter to what they may have been taught or what works for them. The prospect of taking it a day at a time, and learning to live with the desire to drink, to me, it seems only feeds your mind that you are giving something up and that you are the only one in the way of that pleasure. As Carr would say, "What a morbid prospect!"
To be fair, it has only been 20 days of living life outside of that prison. But I am optimistic, and I encourage anyone with an open mind to read the book, and if it doesn't speak to you on the first read, go back and reread the chapters that speak to your doubts. The book spoke to my personal situation, but I doubt would have worked for me even 10 years ago.
Did Carr convince me to give up drinking without regret, and without the need for willpower? I don't know. I would like to say, Yes, Absolutely! But I admit there is a small doubt in the back of my mind that the lessons will wear off. I believe he did give me a very logical view of what alcohol is, and what it has done to me. I feel good about my decision. I look forward to living my life without the addiction of alcohol.
***UPDATE****7/8/2008
I am still alcohol free after 7 weeks. I feel better than I have in years, and am genuinely happy that I am not drinking. Carr's method is still working for me.
***UPDATE*** Oct. 1, 2008
Still not drinking. Have had a few days where I started thinking it would be fun again. I re-read a few chapters. I still like to refer back to the chapters, and re-read the rules. It really makes no sense to consume alcohol. It takes so much, and returns nothing. It's just a widely available drug. Treat it as it is.
Carr correctly reminds us that alcohol ravages time, health, love, and money. Four things you can never have enough of.
Still not drinking after 4+ months and glad of it.
Mac
****Update Jan. 7, 2009****
I made it through the holidays, and even a New Years Eve party without a drink. I was the only one not drinking, including my wife who still drinks a little wine.
I have not had a drink in 7+ months. I still look at drinkers, and have no desire to join them, but there are times when I have felt restless. Like I was missing something. I like to go back and review a few chapters of Carr. It still helps to do so.
I can honestly say that I have never felt better. I sleep well, and have a clarity of thought that is hard to describe to someone who hasn't experienced it. I read more, and just have more time in my head.
I still think Carr works best for those of us who do not have underlying issues, because those will still be there. I also don't think it would have worked for me in my 20's, I was just too hung up on partying away my life, though I wish I could go back. What a waste of time, money, etc.
Best of luck to anyone reading this.
**** Update June 1, 2009 ****
Just wanted to add an update that I passed one year about a week ago. It was a good year, and I did enjoy passing each first without drinking. First vacation, first birthday, first holidays. I feel better than I have in years, and I sleep better than ever now. I also have more quality time in my head, and accredit that to becoming more religious. That is one thing that surprised me. I have not become a religious fanatic, however. I just feel calmer, and more open to religion.
One other thing that has happened, is that I am doing some things in my personal life, that I put off for 20 years. Some personal goals and ambitions that did not mix with drinking.
I hope that if you are like I was, that you can find the peace that I have.
