The Emotionally Healthy Church: A Strategy for Discipleship that Actually Changes Lives [Hardcover]

Peter Scazzero (Author), Warren Bird (Contributor)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 1, 2003

True Discipleship Integrates Emotional and Spiritual Health. New Life Fellowship in Queens, New York, had it all: powerful teaching, dynamic ministries, an impressive growth rate, and a vision to do great works for God. Things looked good---but beneath the surface, circumstances were more than just brewing. They were about to boil over, forcing Peter Scazzero to confront needs in his church and himself that went deeper than he'd ever imagined. What he learned about the vital link between emotional health, relational depth, and spiritual maturity can shed new light on painful problems in your own church. Here are refreshing new insights, and a different and challenging slant on what it takes to lead your congregation to wholeness and maturity in Christ. Our churches are in trouble, says Scazzero. They are filled with people who are -unsure how to biblically integrate anger, sadness, and other emotions -defensive, incapable of revealing their weaknesses -threatened by or intolerant of different viewpoints -zealous about ministering at church but blind to their spouses' loneliness at home -so involved in 'serving' that they fail to take care of themselves -prone to withdraw from conflict rather than resolve it Sharing from New Life Fellowship's painful but liberating journey, Scazzero reveals exactly how the truth can and does make people free---not just superficially, but deep down. After offering a new vision of discipleship and a revealing, guided self-assessment of your own spiritual and emotional maturity, The Emotionally Healthy Church takes you through six principles that can make a profound difference in your church. You'll acquire knowledge and tools that can help you and others - look beneath the surface of problems - break the power of past wounds, failures, sins, and circumstances - live a life of brokenness and vulnerability - recognize and honor personal limitations and boundaries - embrace grief and loss - make incarnation your model to love others. Written in a personal and passionate style, The Emotionally Healthy Church includes hands-on tools, discussion questions, spotlights on key points, and story after story of people at New Life whose lives have been changed by the concepts in this book. Open these pages, and find out how your church can turn a new corner on the road to spiritual maturity.

Editorial Reviews

Review

'More than ever, the church needs the message of this outstanding book. The souls of our churches are hungering for ways to get healthy and stay healthy and 'normal,' and 'The Emotionally Healthy Church' shows us how to facilitate that.' -- Les Parrot, PhD, Author, Relationships <br><br>

From the Publisher

New Foreword from the author

After several years of living out the principles of The Emotionally Healthy Church within the local church I pastor, I wrote them in the first edition of this book. My intention was to speak particularly to pastors, elders, deacons, and ministry and small group leaders. Little did I know that the book's message would spread beyond church leaders to countless others struggling with the integration of emotional health and biblical spirituality. Even more of a surprise was the centrality of this issue not only for the church in North America, but around the world.

During the seven years since the first edition, my understanding of the six principles that make up emotionally healthy churches has grown deeper, sharper, and broader. I have grown theologically as I have encountered new personal and leadership applications of the material. As a result, each chapter has been edited, expanded, and updated.

Moreover, this journey has led me to add a seventh, indispensable principle: lead with integrity. The pace of my life slowed down considerably when I began integrating emotional health with my discipleship. It takes time -- lots of it -- to feel, to grieve, to listen, to reflect, to be mindful of what is going on around and in us. This radically shifted my priorities at home and in my work. Emotional health also created a hunger within Geri and me for a deeper communion with God. This in turn led to an exploration of contemplative spiritual practices, culminating in a four-month sabbatical in 2003 - 2004. Our aim was to study the riches of the contemplative tradition and its applications for a missional church like ours. This immersion into such spiritual disciplines as silence and solitude transformed us, and eventually, our church. Insights from these experiences are sprinkled throughout the book.

While the contemplative tradition helped me considerably in my efforts to lead with integrity, I had yet to apply emotional health to my leadership. That turned out to be a challenging, complex task. I describe this unfolding in the new chapter 11, "Slow Down to Lead with Integrity."

One final note: Resist the temptation to breeze through these pages. This is not a book meant to be read quickly in one or two sittings. This is not simply the latest fascinating idea to incorporate in your God-talk with colleagues or parishioners. I invite you to wrestle deeply with these truths as you consider how they apply to both your inner life and leadership. You could spend a lifetime plumbing the depths of each -- from limits, to brokenness, to grieving, to learning to love well. Please read slowly, prayerfully, and thoughtfully. As you do, ask the question, "How is God coming to me through this?" Consider making personal applications in a journal or in the back of the book, noting the page number for future reference.

Be sure to grasp the central thesis: Emotional health and spiritual maturity are inseparable. It is not possible to be spiritually mature while remaining emotionally immature. When you understand this, you will walk through a door in your spiritual journey. Few ever return to a tip-of-the-iceberg discipleship that overemphasizes activity but does not deeply transform from the inside out. By God's grace, you will never be the same. And you will embark on an exciting journey toward a beautiful life that will touch everyone around you -- in your family, church, workplace, and neighborhood. --This text refers to an alternate Hardcover edition.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 223 pages
• Publisher: Zondervan (March 1, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0310246547
• ISBN-13: 978-0310246541
• Product Dimensions: 8.6 x 5.6 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.4 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (67 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #367,052 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

34 of 35 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars This is a Good Book January 1, 2004

By R. Kirkham VINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase

PREMISE: Too many of our churches are led by people who claim spiritual maturity, but lack the ability to live godly lives because of their emotional immaturity. Now . . . do we know ahyone like that?!?

PLAN: We must (starting with the leaders) grow in emotional maturity. Here are the basic steps . . . 1) We must look below the surface of our lives, 2) We must come to grips with the scars from our past, 3) We must learn to be honest about our brokenness and become vulnerable. (I have noticed that those Christians I most admire have the ability to be open and honest about their lives.), 4) We must learn how to say, "No" and follow God rather than be pushed around by others, 5) We must not run from the pain of life, but rather embrace it and learn to grow through pain, 6) We must take the lessons we have learned and step into incarnational ministry as Jesus did.

POSITIVES: The author writes from personal experience. After many years of seemingly successful ministry as a pastor with a rapidly growing church plant and invitations to speak in a growing number of seminars across the country he finds himself with a crumbling marriage and a major church split when one of his staff defects and starts a new rival ministry. The pain of this experience woven through the pages of the book lend an air of credibility to the message.

PROBLEMS: There aren't many. The author's mix of counseling techniques and spiritual formation could cause the reader to raise his or her eyebrows, but I don't consider this much of a problem. I like to be challenged by what I read. The author waxes and wanes hot and cold in a place or two. I liked some chapters better than others, but that's normal for me. The only reason I didn't give this book 5 stars is because I am not certain right now if the book will cause a change in my life. I only give 5 stars to those works that change me.

PREDICTION: This book will become an important work among pastors and in church leadership training.

20 of 20 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars A comprehensive guide to enhance emotional health in your church September 22, 2005

By Wilbur Fong

Format:Hardcover

Scazzero's thesis is that the emotional health and spiritual health of a Christian are inseparable. The discipleship model of the church must nurture emotional growth in order to foster true spiritual maturity. Scazzero suggests six principles in building an emotionally healthy church: (1) Look beneath the iceberg; (2) Break the power of the past; (3) Live in brokenness and vulnerability; (4) Receive the gift of limits; (5) Embrace grieving and loss; and (6) Make incarnation the model of loving well.

One benefit of this book is that Scazzero has integrated various topics of emotional health and Christian spirituality into a single volume, providing the backbone for a comprehensive discipleship course on emotional health. Daniel Coleman pioneered emotional intelligence. Edwin Friedman and Ronald Richardson developed family systems theory. Henri Nouwen wrote The Wounded Healer. Henry Cloud and John Townsend advocated boundaries. Parker Palmer relates vocational discernment and accepting limits. Jerry Sittster and Nicholas Wolterstorff shared how God may be doing soul work through experiences of grief and loss. Numerous experts have talked about listening skills, self-differentiation, and empathy. Scazzero's contribution is in pulling these resources together; weaving them masterfully into a coherent work; and providing compelling reasons why this work is important for the emotional health of the church.

A second benefit is that Scazzero has taken an evangelical approach by making a noble attempt to build his six principles on biblical foundations. For example, Scazzero takes the secular Emotional Intelligence material and slips a theology of grace underneath. The Gospel provides the motivation, power, and security for us to look beneath the surface (principle 1). Similarly, principle 3 is built on Paul's theology of weakness; principle 5 on the biblical basis of lamenting found in the Psalms; and principle 6 on a theology of incarnation. In this respect, Scazzero may have gone beyond the work of some of the masters listed above.

The third contribution is that Scazzero has taken the application of his principles beyond an individual to the entire church. The Copernican revolution begins with the senior pastor. Its effect rings out to other staff, elders and board members, the congregation, and to the wider community in concentric circles. Scazzero shares his experience at New Life Fellowship and outlines many practical suggestions on how these principles may be implemented in preaching, education, small group, and counseling ministries of the church.

I recommend this book to all church leaders who desire to take emotional health seriously and to implement a discipleship strategy that will change lives.

16 of 17 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Don't go any further... March 2, 2006

By Donald C. Hartness

Format:Hardcover

So many books, but so little substance. If you are a church leader, pastor, minister, or leader of a small group, this book is beyond must read. Many books will help you teach spiritual principles, many books will teach you how to build width in membership and attendance, but this book will help you build DEPTH and will start with one person: you. Don't go any further in your ministry until you've read this. You won't regret it.