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The Friendship Factor: How to Get Closer to the People You Care for Paperback – January 1, 2004


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 244 pages
  • Publisher: Fortress Press; Anniversary edition (January 1, 2004)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0806635711
  • ISBN-13: 978-0806635712
  • Product Dimensions: 4.2 x 6.9 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (58 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #201,146 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

An updated edition of the original bestseller!

--Readers learn how to be a warmer, more loving person, how to communicate better, to resolve tension in relationships
--For friendships, marital relationships, and parents and their children.

The first edition of The Friendship Factor, published in 1979, has sold more than 350,000 copies.

About the Author

Alan Loy McGinnis is co-director of Valley Counseling Center in Glendale, California.

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Customer Reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
5 star
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4 star
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See all 58 customer reviews
If you have not read this book yet... do so now.
V. VanCamp
You'll remember something you read every time you interact with someone, and that simple suggestion will make a difference you can feel.
Adam L. R. Summers
The Friendship Factor is an excellent book with sound, practical and very helpful insights.
Elaine

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

91 of 94 people found the following review helpful By V. VanCamp on September 27, 2001
Format: Paperback
I believe that if the entire world read this book we would be a happier, healthier, friendlier, more supportive, more understanding and a more tolerant planet. I think this book should be required reading in schools!
This book is as applicable today as it was when it was written over 20 years ago. Maybe even more so. Even if you think you have the right approach to people and relationships and even if you feel all your relationships are healthy... you could learn from this book. I guarantee there are things in this book that you have not thought of.
I love this book and I highly recommend it because I believe it will benefit you and make you a better person. It had a great impact on me. I intend to read it annually.
The author gives ideas on how to deepen friendships. These include: 1) Assign top priority to your relationships 2)Dare to talk about affection 3)Learn the gesturs of love (i.e appreciating someone offering help and graciously accepting this help) AND 4) CREATE SPACE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP (in other words don't CONTROL, don't strangle ~ let them grow and breathe!!!
The author also gives pointers on cultivating intimacy. He suggests that you 1) Be liberal with praise 2) Learn to LISTEN (such as asking questions the other will enjoy answering, get the other to talk about themselves and dispensing advice SPARINGLY) 3) Use your body to demonstrate warmth AND 4) Talk freely about your feelings (Dare to need the other person and let them feel that and benefit from it)
A quote from the book that I especially like is: "Don't stop expressing needs because of occasional disappointment - you'll end up bedding down with disappointment as your constant companion.
Read more ›
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31 of 31 people found the following review helpful By Lana on May 12, 2005
Format: Paperback
I bought this book over 20 years ago at my childhood summer camp bookstore and I have definitely gotten my money's worth. Having been read and re-read over the years, it is one of the most worn out books I own and definitely one of the most valuable.

This book not only tells you how to get great friends but how to be a great friend and how to take the friendships you have to a deeper and more meaningful level. I'll often pick it up for a re-read when I feel a tension in my friendships or when I just want to refocus on the people I love.
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20 of 21 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on August 7, 1998
Format: Paperback
I've read this book twice and given it to several people, including my mother who said, "Everyone should have this as a reference book in their home." The author, who doesn't conceal his Christian background, does the best job of anyone I've read at putting core human ethics and etiquette into a package without a hint of religious language or preachiness. There are stories in "The Friendship Factor" that have stayed with me for 15 years and are as powerful as any lecture, advice or sermon I've heard.
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15 of 15 people found the following review helpful By Friends Forever on July 10, 2005
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This continues to be one of my all-time favorite books. Everyone should read it at least once. I pick it up and read it every couple of years and always get as much or more out of it than the first time I read it 25 years ago. There are no "mind games" here - just plain, simple, practical information that makes you think about the people in your life and how you treat them. I cannot even guess how many copies I have given to family and friends over the years. At any given time I have multiple copies in my den just waiting for me to give them away. (Right now, there are nine copies ready to go!) I have mentioned and recommended the book on television many times over the years. Truly a favorite!
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18 of 19 people found the following review helpful By dking2@mindspring.com on June 12, 1998
Format: Paperback
This book is excellent at helping you develop an "Emotional Intimacy" with the relationships in your life with your spouse, children, and close friendships. If you don't have any friendships, this will help you create some. :) One book that I would HIGHLY recommend to just about anyone.
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful By G. J. Martin on February 18, 2007
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book gave me brilliant insight into friendships and relationship building. It is a real privilege to be able to learn from Alan McGinnis the keys to good friendships. These are tried and proved priciples and I thought the value placed on true friendship and the practical examples were inspiring and helpful.
Using Jesus as an example was not over the top as it gave us insight into someone most people know about and and an awesome example of how to live the ultimate life.
A real help to those who feel the need for richer friendships in this increasingly lonely world.
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20 of 22 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on July 25, 2001
Format: Paperback
I am writing this review because I firmly believe that my life will be incomplete without friends. My personal history is full of troubles and problems with people. I have a hard time dealing with my friends. Anyway, my roommate have this book lying around, so I picked it up. I read it and I really like the suggestions. I found some of the short stories to be really heartwarming and strong.
After reading this book, I have some self motivation to become a better person and a better friend. In some sense, I think this book gave me a lot of personal growth. I subsequently became a better person and I think I am more sensitive now than before. My awareness and motivation have changed my attitude and technique in talking to people.
I heartily recommend this book for anybody who wants to know how to be a better talker, listener or friend.
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