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The Good News About Marriage: Debunking Discouraging Myths about Marriage and Divorce Hardcover – May 6, 2014
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“In the thirty-two years I have been deeply immersed in the world of marriage ministry, I have been demoralized at times by the negative statistics quoted. And now I am ecstatic as I read the truth in this incredible book. Thank you, Shaunti, for doing the hard work necessary to expose the myths and lies and for finally revealing the facts about marriage. This book and the undeniable research in it is a game changer!”
—Jimmy Evans, founder and CEO of MarriageToday, senior pastor of Trinity Fellowship
“This is an important book. Shaunti and Tally do an impressive job of showing that there is room for different viewpoints on divorce statistics and room for optimism about marriage. I believe that people make higher-risk choices partly because they have lost hope in marriage, and this book presents a basis for real hope.”
—Dr. Scott Stanley, coauthor of A Lasting Promise, research professor at the University of Denver
“Lamenting the demise of the family has almost become a cottage industry. There’s a lot of legitimate bad news out there, but Shaunti reminds readers that the situation might not be nearly as dire as we think—in fact, there are encouraging signs of hope. That’s a welcome message!”
—Jim Daly, president of Focus on the Family
“There are many bad stats out there about marriage, but Shaunti debunks those myths and provides clarity about marriage in general and how to strengthen your own marriage. The Good News About Marriage is well worth your time.”
—Ed Stetzer, PhD, president of LifeWay Research
“Every Christian leader in America needs to read the groundbreaking, hope-filled research in this book. Then they need to recommend that everyone in their sphere of influence read it as well! This is one of the most important marriage books I’ve ever read, and it will change how all of us think and talk about marriage
—Lysa TerKeurst, New York Times best-selling author, president of Proverbs 31 Ministries
“This book is great news about marriage! Every pastor, coach, or counselor will find a new zeal for working with marriages after learning the truth about the state of marriage today. I cannot wait to have Shaunti share these truths with the Catalyst audience.”
—Tyler Reagin, executive director of Catalyst
“The Good News About Marriage offers an important word of encouragement to believers who wonder if faith makes a difference in modern married life. Believers who put their faith into practice—who worship together and pray together—are much more likely to enjoy stable and happy marriages. This is good news indeed.”
—W. Bradford Wilcox, director of the National Marriage Project, associate professor of sociology at the University of Virginia
“Academically rigorous, honest, and refreshingly bold, this book will make you question what you’ve always heard about the bad news of marriage. A seminal work, this book could change the social narrative about marriage for generations. This is a mustread for academics, marriage educators, and couples alike.”
—Ron L. Deal, director of FamilyLife Blended, best-selling author of The Smart Stepfamily
“This groundbreaking research gives us a whole different framework to think about marriage, divorce, and relationships. This is fantastic material that provides powerful tools to help us improve our personal relationships and those in our communities.”
—Jud Wilhite, author of The God of Yes, pastor of Central Christian Church
“Shaunti’s thoroughly researched book will inject life and hope, not only into our national consciousness about marriage, but also into every individual marriage in the country.”
—Dr. Tim Clinton, president of American Association of Christian Counselors, executive director of Center for Counseling and Family Studies at Liberty University
“Shaunti takes aim at marriage myths that have spread like cancer through our culture—myths that have become self-fulfilling prophecies. This book is packed with game-changing revelations! Bravo to Shaunti for her outstanding research.”
—Emerson Eggerichs, best-selling author of Love and Respect
“This is some of the most important information on marriage for this generation, and Shaunti brings practical inspiration on every page. This is the new go-to book for facts on marriages in America—and it’s much better news than we often hear.”
—Dr. Jim Burns, president of HomeWord, author of Creating an Intimate Marriage and Closer
“You’ve read the bad news about marriage—the cohabiting couples, extramarital affairs, and soaring divorce rates. But this book shows there’s a lot of good news about marriage today, and it’s about time someone said so!”
—Bob Lepine, co-host of FamilyLife Today
“It’s impossible to overstate the importance of these findings. Our beliefs directly influence our actions, and our beliefs about marriage have been wrong. Shaunti and Tally provide genuine hope that is based on truth. This book changes everything.”
—Christopher McCluskey, best-selling author, president of Professional Christian Coaching Institute
“Shaunti Feldhahn presents profound truth in the most relatable way. We have consistently used her books to help lay foundations for strong marriages in our church and to gain tremendous perspective about our own relationship. Now, in The Good News About Marriage, Shaunti gives us the gifts of a positive perspective and a practical strategy to make the most of our marriages.”
—Steven and Holly Furtick, lead pastor of Elevation Church, author of the New York Times bestseller Greater
About the Author
Shaunti Feldhahn is a Harvard-trained social researcher, popular speaker, and best-selling author of For Women Only and other books with sales of more than two million copies in 22 languages. Her relationship findings have been featured in media as diverse as the New York Times, Focus on the Family, Cosmo, and The Today Show. She and her husband, Jeff, have two children and live in Atlanta.
More About the Author
Contact for Speaking Engagements: Naomi Duncan at NDuncan@shaunti.com or 615-300-4837
Shaunti received her graduate degree from Harvard University and was an analyst on Wall Street before unexpectedly becoming a social researcher and best-selling author.
Today, she applies her analytical skills to investigating eye-opening, life-changing truths about relationships, both at home and in the workplace. Her groundbreaking research-based books, such as For Women Only, have sold more than 2 million copies in 22 languages and are widely read in homes, counseling centers and corporations worldwide.
Where the "Only" series revealed the often-unseen needs of men and women, her multi-year research project, published in The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, investigates the process of what makes great relationships.
On May 6th her newest book The Good News About Marriage will be released. This research centers around the good news about marriage, debunking the grim facts we've heard for so long about marriage and divorce: Half of all marriages end in divorce. The divorce rate inside the church is the same as outside. And, most marriages are just holding on. But what if these "facts" are actually myths? In The Good News About Marriage, Shaunti Feldhahn presents groundbreaking research that reveals the shocking, incredibly inspiring truth:
* The actual divorce rate has never gotten close to 50 percent.
* Those who attend church regularly have a significantly lower divorce rate than those who don't.
* Most marriages are happy.
* Simple changes make a big difference in most marriage problems.
* Most remarriages succeed.
Shaunti's findings have been featured in media as diverse as The Today Show and Focus on the Family, The New York Times and MomLife Today. Shaunti, Jeff and their two children live in Atlanta and enjoy every minute of living life at warp speed.
Top Customer Reviews
Consider how often you have heard someone say that the divorce rate is nearly 50%. However the divorce rate in our country is not this high. They write, "The actual divorce rate has never been 50 percent. It's significantly lower and has been declining over the last thirty years." (Feldhan & Whitehead, The Good News About Marriage. 2014) Not only that, but they also share research that most people who are married are in fact happily married. You wouldn’t have guessed that by listening to media reports or consulting the tabloids in your local grocery store. Shaunti and Tally also share the good news in their book that active faith is statistically proven to improve marriages.
The book is a fairly quick paced read even with the statistical information that they refer to often. It is optimistic in tone, but not overly Polly Anna. They recognize that there are still many marriages in trouble, but they also want to push back against those who have bought a lie that marriage is hopeless. This will be an excellent resource for any pastor or counselor that works with married couples, speaks about marriage, or counsels those preparing for marriage. Do yourself a favor and read it before your next sermon on marriage. I did and was very grateful.
I purchased a copy of this text in Kindle format and read it on my iPad 2. The format was well done. The charts are readable and even the pull quotes were easy to identify. So many kindle books struggle with graphical elements and pull quotes, this publisher, Multnomah Books, gets it right!
So read this short easily digestible book and do away with these five demoralizing myths:
1. The actual divorce rate has never been close to 50 percent. It’s significantly lower and has been declining over the last thirty years.
2. Most marriages aren’t just so-so. The vast majority are happy.
3. The rate of divorce in the church is not the same as among the non-church going population. It too is significantly lower.
4. Remarriages aren’t doomed. A significant majority survive and thrive.
5. Most marriage problems aren’t caused by big-ticket issues, so being in a marriage, or fixing a troubled one, doesn’t have to be as complicated as people think. Little things can often make a big difference (Page 12 uncorrected proof).
The author is taking very complex information and helping the reader understand some easily misunderstood facts from the data. The author does a valuable service for her reader: “Both in these pages and FAQ section at the back off the book, we will provide a tutorial to help cut through the confusion and evaluate any reports you may see in the future” (Page 21 uncorrected proof).
There is a hefty FAQ section at the end of the book that helps to reader to “delve more deeply into some of the technical issues of the research” and “answer the ‘But what about…? Questions that have frequently been asked” (Page 137 uncorrected proof).Read more ›
Unfortunately, many of the statistics about marriage and divorce that are prevalent in our culture destroy hope. Fifty percent of all marriages end in divorce, we’re told. For second and third marriages, the divorce rate is even higher: 60 and 73 percent, respectively. Few couples are satisfied with their marriages. Though Christians talk a good game about marriage and family, the reality of divorce and dissatisfaction is the same for them as for everyone else. Finally, making a marriage work requires bigger changes than most couples are willing to make.
The funny thing about these hope-destroying statistics is that they’re wrong, misleading, or both. Instead, as Shaunti Feldhahn and Tally Whitehead argue in their new book, there’s plenty of good news about marriage. Indeed, they identify five specific pieces of good news:
1. The vast majority of marriages last a lifetime; the current divorce rate has never been close to 50 percent—it is closer to 20 to 25 percent for first-time marriages and 31 percent for all marriages—and has been declining for years (p. 39).
2. The vast majority of marriages are happy (around 80 percent)! Most people are glad they married their spouse and, given the chance, would do it all over again (p. 61).
3. The rate of divorce in the church is 25 to 50 percent lower than among those who don’t attend worship services, and those who prioritize their faith and/or pray together are dramatically happier and more connected (p. 86).
4.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
I really was not going to buy this book...so glad I humbled myself and did!
My facial expressions in the train when reading this has to be amusing to others. Read more
If you're married, or you help married couples in any capacity, you need to read this book ASAP! Let's start a revolution of encouragement for marriage.Published 3 months ago by myron powell
This book is so refreshing. The revelations in it bring great encouragement about marriage. We need the truths set forth in this book, because the media has overwhelmed us with... Read morePublished 3 months ago by TL Craft
I believe that the statistics are manipulated in order to make his point. As one that has taught statistics I have learned to mistrust such figures.Published 4 months ago by Lee Jensen
I am taking a Marriage and Family class in college, and the incorrect statistics are talked about all the time. Read morePublished 5 months ago by Rachel N.
I really appreciated how they went back to original studies and researchers to clarify what the data said. They put things in clear lay language anyone could grasp. Read morePublished 6 months ago by Amazon Customer
Very insightful and helpful info. It gives people of faith hope and will impact many to continue working on their marriage and the effect of faith on a marriage.Published 6 months ago by Joshua B Moran