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The Grateful Undead: They're So Vein

4.1 out of 5 stars 82 customer reviews
Book 1 of 4 in the Grateful Undead Series

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

In Susan Stec's written world she is immortal. She catches vamp-animals, plays with fairies, laughs with ghosts, chases a seer, employs a doppelganger, fights with werewolves, hates trolls, cuts down rogues and has an on-again, off-again romance with the oldest immortal on the planet - who has the biggest (ahem) fangs you've ever seen. When she drifts back into reality, she lives with her husband and three King Charles Spaniels on 50 acres of woods, fields and streams in upper Michigan; hunts deer with her Ruger or crossbow, paints watercolors, sculpts stained glass and chases butterflies with her dogs. Her personal favorite quote: One's real life is so often the life that one does not lead ~Oscar Wilde
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 210 pages
  • Publisher: Black Matrix Publishing LLC (September 16, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0615535526
  • ISBN-13: 978-0615535524
  • Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.5 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.7 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (82 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #10,208,512 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Watch for WITCHY, spring 2016

From USA Today Bestselling Author Susan Stec,

I love laughing with my daughters, class B scary movies, fine cuisine and hamburgers from Wendy's. I'm addicted to electronics, dark chocolate, vintage eyeglass frames, and fuzzy warm socks.

There isn't just one thing I'm passionate about. I love living on fifty acres in upper state MI, and often get up in the middle of the night to listen to the coyote sing. I sculpt stained glass and paint with watercolor, but most of all I write. I write because I have to and because it amuses me to live vicariously through my zany characters.

One's real life is so often the life that one does not lead~~Oscar Wilde

Connect with Susan Stec on: http://thegratefulundead.blogspot.com/
Facebook, Goodreads, Pinterest, Google and @Suesan0814 on Twitter







Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
What would you really be like if you were turned into a vampire? Would you like to be one? Susan always wanted to be a vampire and now she's getting her wish which brings her more problems than she ever dreamed possible.
This story shows what happens to an average family when the 50+ year old Susan gets changed into a HOT vampire babe. The fun all starts when the whole family of cranky women want to be changed. Things don't go down well when they find out there are rules to their new vampire life and consequences to their bloodsucking activities which they have to sort out themselves.

Susan Stec has created real characters who are witty, smart-mouthed, and way too funny for their own good. The family dont' get on with each other, how are they expected to get on with other vampires and work with them.
Very humourous story and the characters stay in your head with their hilarious dynamics.
Thankgoodness there are more books to come.

This story is unlike any vampire story you have read. A very enjoyable read and I look forward to other books in this series.
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Format: Paperback
What's funnier than an octogenarian who suddenly finds herself undead, with a vociferous appetite for sex and the lingering mentality of a senior citizen? (Except, perhaps, potty-mouthed fifth-grade cartoon kids ( a la South Park), and since there's a cheeky Vampire tyke in the story with a trashy mouth, who's not afraid to use it, the author has covered all the bases.)

A fresh take on the oft-bitten vampire milieu, They're so Vein is a book that illustrates (hysterically) what happens when all (except one) of the estrogen-producing members of one family suddenly find themselves blood-suckers.

The characters are each funnier than the next: Susan is their bitchy leader, who got them all into this undead mess, but couldn't care less since she's now wrinkle free and has perky tits.

Then there's her sister, JoAnn, who can't quite get on board with the whole "drinking-human-blood-thing. " She ends up screwing with the eco-system by feeding on animals and accidentally turning them. PETA would be pissed.

And I'd be remiss if I didn't, again, mention Susan's eighty-something mother, who keeps bringing home men half her age, and is having a love affair with her battery-operated sex toy. (Her and Christopher, the mouthy Vampire kid, are my favorite characters. Fantastic one-liners!)

And Susan's kids... one daughter who's happy to play the fanged version of a kick-ass action hero, while the eldest daughter - the only sane one among them - decides to stay human, thank you very much.

It's all fun and games until the "serious" (old!) vampires come knocking, and expect this motley crew of newly-turned idiots to pay for their every Vampiric transgression. Sex, blood, and heads will roll...I think you'll find They're So Vein a funny, enjoyable romp.

(I smell a sequel!)

FIVE STAR RECOMMEND
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
OK...so I will first admit that I have never really been a vamp-fan. Blood should be kept INSIDE a body, not sipped from a bendy-straw or sucked from...body parts. However, this story is so "frigging" cool. I know these people, I've lived with these immortals and I can only warn the unbelieving that the best is yet to come from Susan and her awesome family of women...Gatorland! (not meant to spoil the ending...) Keep up the great work, looking forward to the sequel...if you need an assitant, come bite me :)
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Susan is a middle aged snoop with a youtube blog. When she hears a smart alecky kid back talking his caretaker in the bathroom stall, she decides to record it on her phone. Problem is, he is not a kid and he has decided to have a snack, one thing leads to another and Susan ends up back at the family home where she resides with 3 generations of her family, all female. When they get a look at the perks of being a vampire, such as perky breasts and the body of a 25 year old, they begin to think that having to drink blood might not be so bad. Add the fact that they didn't respond to the "Vampire Welcome Pack" in a timely manner now they are in trouble with the council..

Although I found a few editing mistakes (a couple actually threw me out of the story), do not let that keep you from reading this hilarious take, satire? on the new vampire genre. In this story you have the Grandma, otherwise known as Mom, Nanna or Chick, who resembled Sophia from Golden Girls. Susan and JoAnne, sisters with very different outlooks and behaviors.

I found the family dynamics fun and fairly familiar. The council guys were intimidating and adorable at the same time.

In this you will find vampires, a werewolf, a fairy, a troll and a few other things that aren't supposed to exist.

I HIGHLY recommend this funny fangy frolic.
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Format: Paperback
Susan has created an irreverent, hilarious, quick moving romp filled with characters who you love to laugh at. My personal favorite is the vamp-coons although I don't want to give away any more than that. This is a must read, in fact I read the entire novel in one night. I couldn't put it down. Can't wait for the sequel!
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Susan Stec's THE UNGRATEFUL DEAD: THEY'RE SO VEIN, is a rip-snorting satire on all things vampiric and paranormal. If comedy lurks on the other side of any societal boundary, you can be certain Susan's characters will sashay across it without a backwards glance.

Rather than following the current convention of brooding immortals, Susan gives us a zany family of middle-aged and elderly women suddenly returned to the prime of their youth (albeit an undead youth), with the bonuses of being gorgeous vampires. Rather than whining about it, they glory in it, but their outrageous behavior has not gone unnoticed. There's hierarchy and rules for paranormal beings, and as the girls have been adjusting to their undead lives, they've tromped their stiletto heels all over them, and unfortunately, the Lords of the Undead are not the forgive nor the forget type.

As someone who's overdosed on the vampiric saturation of the entertainment industry, I was hesitant to give this a shot despite recommendations from friends, but I'm very glad I did because Susan has breathed freshness into genre that needed it badly.

Highly recommended for fans of Charlaine Harris's "Sookie Stackhouse" novels, and Christopher Moore's BLOODSUCKING FIENDS, or basically any of his work.
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