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The Language of Emotions: What Your Feelings Are Trying to Tell You Paperback – Unabridged, May 28, 2010


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The Language of Emotions: What Your Feelings Are Trying to Tell You + The Art of Empathy: A Complete Guide to Life's Most Essential Skill + Your Aura & Your Chakras: The Owner's Manual
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 432 pages
  • Publisher: Sounds True (May 28, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1591797691
  • ISBN-13: 978-1591797692
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 1.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (86 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #30,732 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Empath Karla McLaren is an award-winning author, social science researcher, and pioneering educator whose empathic approach to emotions has taken her through the healing of her own childhood trauma, into a healing career, and now into the study of sociology, anthropology, neurology, cognitive psychology, and education. She is the author of The Language of Emotions: What Your Feelings Are Trying to Tell You (Sounds True, 2010), the online course Emotional Flow: Becoming Fluent in the Language of Emotions (Sounds True, 2012) and The Art of Empathy: A Complete Guide to Life's Most Essential Skill (October, 2013).


More About the Author

Karla McLaren is an award-winning author, social science researcher, and pioneering educator whose empathic approach to emotions revalues even the most "negative" emotions, and opens startling new pathways into the depths of the soul. Her website is karlamclaren.com

She is the author of The Art of Empathy: A Complete Guide to Life's Most Essential Skill (2013), The Language of Emotions (2010), and the multi-media online course Emotional Flow (2012).

Karla has taught at such venues as the University of San Francisco, Omega Institute, Naropa University, Kripalu Center, and the Association for Humanistic Psychology. Additionally, as a prison arts educator with the William James Foundation, she has utilized singing, drumming, and drama to help men in maximum security prisons explore and heal long-held emotional traumas.

Karla is also a Certified Human Resource Administrator and a Certified Career Development Facilitator who helps people identify the emotion work they are expected to perform (or expect others to perform, perhaps without realizing it). When emotion work is brought out into the open and managed skillfully, individuals and businesses can avoid unnecessary conflict, burnout, and loss of productivity.

In her academic career, Karla served as a researcher and editor on the books When Killing is a Crime by Tony Waters, Ph.D, and Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships by Janja Lalich, Ph.D.

With Dr. Lalich, Karla also co-authored a research study on the multiple stigmatizations that GLBTQ people experience in fundamentalist religions (Inside and Outcast: Multifaceted Stigma and Redemption in the Lives of Gay and Lesbian Jehovah's Witnesses).

A national Phi Kappa Phi honors scholar, Karla is now pursuing her masters in education and focusing her thesis on developing new forms of social interaction and empathy curricula for neurologically diverse people. She lives in Sonoma County, California.

Customer Reviews

As a complicated person I feel that this book will also help me get though some difficult time.
Sarah Marshall
In this book, McLaren is presenting a new way of understanding how the emotions you feel today can bring you wisdom and understanding (if approached in the right way).
Adam Khan
My personal experience in dealing with transforming emotions has been very powerful--and this book gives the reader instructions to do that very easily.
TC

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

69 of 71 people found the following review helpful By TC on July 2, 2010
Format: Paperback Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
This book is tremendous and at times excruciatingly insightful. The author has a fantastic understanding of emotions and healing and is able to articulate it in an easy to read from with concrete examples. The truth just pours from the pages--gives me goosebumps.

Before I had read this book, I had the experience of "going into the emotion"--just feeling it for what it was--not analyzing, etc. It is absolutely true that when you do that, and leave out the story--that the emotion quickly dissipates. I had not thought of it as giving me energy and life force--but after reading this book--perhaps that is exactly what it is. My personal experience in dealing with transforming emotions has been very powerful--and this book gives the reader instructions to do that very easily. Of course, you have to be willing---sometimes when I am angry I don't necessarily want to give up the story or move on from the anger. But repressing that feeling--or any feeling leads to disease--so it is especially great for me to have a book that can kind of prod me to move on and deal with any feeling in a healthy way.

I thought the sections and breakdown of each emotion was insightful. The author lets you know what gifts that emotion can bring. She also articulates what power comes from that emotion. And lets you know what being stuck in that emotion can do to you. Her description of each one was exactly the same as my experiences. The difference is that she has been able to put it into a great teachable format and I have not.

There are many self-help books out there in the world. I find that a lot of books have some good and a lot not so good. Or that the book promises a lot but doesn't really have the substance to deliver.
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62 of 66 people found the following review helpful By William Bagley on July 10, 2010
Format: Paperback Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
I do processed oriented hypnosis with clients and was happy to get this book from the Amazon review program to check out. I have read a lot of books on hypnosis, on emotions, and self-help books in general. Suggestive hypnotic technique tends to only have an effect for about 3 months (for instance, a well placed suggestion to end cigarette smoking seems to stop working after about 3 months). Many methods simply do not go deep enough to shift a person in a relatively permanent way. This book is by an author who has discovered some methods very similar to what I have found to work for me and my clients. It is more based on meditation than trying to superficially fix something in a person. It looks to how we relate to our emotional life and how to heal our way of disassociating and distracting ourselves from how we feel. It helps a person form a healthy relationship with his or her emotional life. It affirms the validity of all our emotional feelings and how to be present to our emotional life. It gives a lot of examples about what each emotion means and what each emotion wants to give to us. Because it similar to what I have been doing, I found a lot of exercises and thoughts useful for refining my technique a little further. It requires the client to learn how to stay in touch with his or her emotions, to be present with them, and to be responsible to them (an important theme). One warning: This book is very thick and does not waste words. It could be a training manual, though it reads more poetically and personally than the usual kind. I consider this one to be the best book on emotions yet that I have read. It would be very useful for anyone, but seems ideal for someone working with others.
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23 of 24 people found the following review helpful By Kathleen J Toney on July 21, 2010
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Very well written. No doubt you will see bits and pieces of your own psyche, as well as those of friends and loved ones. If you must learn more about emotions.....this is the most complete out there. Highly recommended. I purchased multiple copies of this for family members. Maybe will buy another for my best friend. There's nothing to dislike about this book. People don't know how to deal with emotions. The author tackles them head-on.
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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful By Adam Khan VINE VOICE on January 1, 2012
Format: Paperback Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
When I saw the comment about this book by Gavin de Becker, I was intrigued. His book, The Gift of Fear, is one of the books I most recommend to others. He said, "This book changed the way I relate to others, and to myself, forever."

I've read a LOT of self-help books (and wrote one), and this is one of the most original I've ever come across. I usually prefer books by scientists like Martin Seligman or John Gottman, but there isn't much in the way of research or studies in The Language of Emotions. The author, Karla McLaren, is not anti-science, but this book is very personal and her expertise is personal. The material is refreshing and makes sense, but you won't get a lot of "proof" other than your own experience, which sometimes is enough.

In this book, McLaren is presenting a new way of understanding how the emotions you feel today can bring you wisdom and understanding (if approached in the right way). She asks you to see your emotions as "specific and brilliant messengers," and she shows you how to do it.

The way we normally think of emotions is wrong, says McLaren. There are no "good" emotions or "bad" emotions. All emotions are valueable and necessary and can help us, and she is not referring to any kind of positive thinking here or trying to transform "negative emotions" into "positive emotions." She's talking about something more authentic and profound. This is a very different way of thinking about emotions; considering that they have skills, functions, gifts. Each emotion has a different purpose.

The first part of the book explains all this and how McLaren came to her conclusions. The last part of the book gives you instructions and examples of applying these ideas to specific emotions, one emotion per chapter. If you'd like to raise your "emotional intelligence" or deal with your emotions more capably and responsibly, I recommend this book.
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