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The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts [Paperback]

Gary D Chapman
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1,302 customer reviews)

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Book Description

December 17, 2009

Marriage should be based on love, right? But does it seem as though you and your spouse are speaking two different languages? New York Times bestselling author Dr. Gary Chapman guides couples in identifying, understanding, and speaking their spouse’s primary love language—quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, or physical touch.

By learning the five love languages, you and your spouse will discover your unique love languages and learn practical steps in truly loving each other. Chapters are categorized by love language for easy reference, and each one ends with specific, simple steps to express a specific language to your spouse and guide your marriage in the right direction. A newly designed love languages assessment will help you understand and strengthen your relationship. You can build a lasting, loving marriage together.

Gary Chapman hosts a nationally syndicated daily radio program called A Love Language Minute that can be heard on more than 150 radio stations as well as the weekly syndicated program Building Relationships with Gary Chapman, which can both be heard on fivelovelanguages.com.

The Five Love Languages is a consistent new York Times bestseller - with over 5 million copies sold and translated into 38 languages.  This book is a sales phenomenon, with each year outselling the prior for 16 years running!

Includes a promotional code to gain exclusive online access to the new comprehensive love languages assessment.
 


Frequently Bought Together

The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts + The 5 Love Languages of Children + The 5 Love Languages Men's Edition: The Secret to Love That Lasts
Price for all three: $30.44

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

GARY CHAPMAN, PhD, is the author of the #1 New York Times bestselling The 5 Love Languages. With over 30 years of counseling experience, he has the uncanny ability to hold a mirror up to human behavior, showing readers not just where they go wrong, but also how to grow and move forward. Dr. Chapman holds BA and MA degrees in anthropology from Wheaton College and Wake Forest University, respectively, MRE and PhD degrees from Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, and has completed postgraduate work at the University of North Carolina and Duke University. For more information visit his website at www.5lovelanguages.com.

From AudioFile

In this unabridged recording of material the author has been perfecting for years, he says that people experience love most strongly through one of five love languages--quality time, words of encouragement, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. Chapman's thoughtful, youthful sounding voice offers these insights not as the Five Commandments of Marriage, but as suggestions he hopes will be helpful. He provides humble examples from his counseling practice, which illuminate his ideas and give a human, down-to-earth quality to the lesson. Without making light of the work a marriage requires, he'll convince most listeners that with just a little planning and effort they can make a good marriage great and a broken partnership truly satisfying again. T.W. 2006 Audie Award Finalist © AudioFile 2006, Portland, Maine-- Copyright © AudioFile, Portland, Maine --This text refers to the Audio CD edition.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 208 pages
  • Publisher: Northfield Publishing; New Edition edition (December 17, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0802473156
  • ISBN-13: 978-0802473158
  • Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1,302 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #26 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

It helped her understand her husband's way of saying I love you and her love language. Toby  |  399 reviewers made a similar statement
It's a very easy to read book. A. Lord  |  305 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
320 of 332 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Learning to Speak December 23, 2010
By Eleanor
Format:Paperback
The main idea behind this book is that just as people have unique personality preferences, we all have unique preferences for what we find satisfying and motivating when it comes to love. Your love language is the way that you most feel loved and cared for. The problem is most people love how they want to be loved, and that doesn't tend to align with how their partner wants to be loved. So, you have to learn to speak your partner's love language. The author also believes that focusing intently on speaking the love languages will rekindle relationships where people don't even seem to like each other anymore.

The relationship expert who wrote the book arranges the book into the five love languages, and provides quizzes to help you determine which language you are:

- Words of Affirmation:
If this is your love language, you feel most cared for when your partner is open and expressive in telling you how wonderful they think you are, how much they appreciate you, etc.
Basically, they find ways to remind you that their world is a better place because you are in it.

- Acts of Service:
If your partner offering to watch the kids so you can go to the gym (or relieving you of some other task) gets your heart going, then this is your love language.

- Affection:
This love language is just as it sounds. A warm hug, a kiss, touch, and sexual intimacy make you feel most loved when this is your love language.

- Quality Time:
This love language is about being together, fully present and engaged in the activity at hand, no matter how trivial.

- Gifts:
Your partner taking the time to give you a gift can make you feel appreciated.

My only critique is that they didn't focus more on understanding and discussing your emotions. For this you and your partner should read Emotional Intelligence 2.0. It did wonders for my husband and I.
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139 of 147 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars a repsonse to the bad reviews July 19, 2011
By Susan
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
i loved this book (i read the kindle version). a lot of the people who gave it low ratings said it was full of simple common sense. to a point, that's true. but 1) simple is NOT the same as easy and 2) when your marriage is in crisis, common sense goes out the window and you start trying crazy things to solve the problem. or you can't even TRY to solve it at all and it spirals out of control. who can think clearly when there is that much tension at home? its nice to have someone point out some really basic changes to make.

my husband and i have COMPLETELY DIFFERENT languages. because of that, we didn't really understand what the other person needed because it was SO DIFFERENT from what each of us needed. we didn't realize how much our actions or lack of actions around a certain "language" affected the other person. now that i understand, of COURSE it seems like common sense, because it is SO SIMPLE. but i DID need someone else to point it out. thank god for Chapman!

this book gives PRODUCTIVE, action-oriented things you can physically DO to help your marriage. most of them take not even 5 minutes a day.

its made a HUGE difference for us. i read it about 7 months ago and my house has been a happy and peaceful place ever since (even through some heated arguments and differences of opinion). i hope it helps you as much.
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143 of 159 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Everyone should speak it. December 1, 2010
By David
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
Dr. Gary Chapman should be nominated for something .....HUGE. This book is a life changer. No, a love changer. Ok, it's both. What hit me right away is it made perfect sense. Then, to top that, by putting the information to actual use, I was able to see real results just like he had written about in the book. After assessing my wife as having the "acts of service" love language, I decided to test out how she would react. I'm usually up and out the door to work before she gets up. I know she enjoys a cup of coffee in the morning and the sooner the better. So, one morning I set up the coffee pot and put a sticky note on it stating, "Just turn me on." She called me at the office and went on and on about how sweet that was and how I scored big points. The guys in the adjoining cubicles were baffled at my side of the conversation. When I told them about the call, and about the book, they thought it worth looking into a bit more.
I've given over a dozen copies to friends and family. I just gave one to my nephew who was recently married. I even sent one to a guy I met on a plane who told me he was engaged. Without exception, people come back and tell me how The 5 Love Languages have made such a positive difference in their relationships. This stuff should be taught in school.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Great read!
Great book for anyone! Gives you a lot to think about in your relationship. Especially if there is room for improvement. I would and have recommended it to friends and clients!
Published 2 hours ago by jeannie
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent condition
The book arrived promptly. It is a very down to earth read that can awake some consciences. I recommend to self centered people.
Published 2 hours ago by valerie s duval
5.0 out of 5 stars The 5 love languages, The Secret to Love That Lasts
This was an excellent book. We used it for our marriage retreat at church and found it to be a great resource. Read more
Published 5 hours ago by James A. Ryan
4.0 out of 5 stars The five love languages
Good book, gives you new perspective on how to make others feel loved. Will use this with my kids as well as with my hubby.
Published 17 hours ago by Sher
5.0 out of 5 stars useful and helpful
My sweet husband and I attended a couples retreat, many of the classes used this book for the lessons, examples, and goals to improve marriages.
Published 1 day ago by Corrine Shakespeare
5.0 out of 5 stars Love this book!
Gary D Champman is a great writer, and this book is very interesting! I can apply what's in this book to real life, and use his advice and teachings to make my relationships... Read more
Published 2 days ago by ChelseaAnne Mattox
5.0 out of 5 stars Saw on Oprah
I saw Gary Chapman on Oprah and enjoyed the discussion. I wanted to take the quiz and thought the book would be great too. Haven't read it yet. Delivery time was very fast.
Published 2 days ago by O. Irvin
5.0 out of 5 stars More understanding now
This book explains how to understand your (potential or current) partner so much more than you thought you did! Read more
Published 2 days ago by Profesora
5.0 out of 5 stars Everyone should read this!
This book will be helpful even if your marriage is doing great. Its nice to finally figure out that its OK to have a primary love language and not have master them all. Read more
Published 2 days ago by Sharon
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read!
This book has changed my understanding of relationships, marriage, and love. I wish had read this every 6 months for the past 18 years. Read more
Published 2 days ago by Kevin M. Eisel
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