36,044 of 36,459 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Dual Function Design
This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a...
Published on November 10, 2008 by B. Govern
845 of 912 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars May have side effects
The effect that this t-shirt has on women is pretty impressive. Unfortunately its natural healing powers reversed my vasectomy and I impregnated nine women in two weeks before I realized. They all had twin boys. Now I have 18 sons and spend most of my money on child support and condoms.
Published on May 29, 2009 by Frank
Most Helpful First | Newest First
36,044 of 36,459 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Dual Function Design,
This review is from: The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee (Apparel)This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.
I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.
Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.
8,969 of 9,096 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Howl at the Heavens!,
This review is from: The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee (Apparel)This shirt has changed my life! Before, I couldn't walk through the aisles at Wal-Mart, graze on the buffet at Sizzler, or even take in a round at my local miniature golf course, without people pointing and saying, "Hey, you're that Zulu guy from Star Wars, aren't you?" Even if I wore sunglasses, I'd still get mistaken for Yoko Ono.
But with The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee, the SHIRT now draws the eye. One young teen even shyly approached me, and instead of asking for a picture or an autograph, simply smiled conspiratorially and whispered, "Team Jacob, right? Me, too. He's sooooooo dreamy."
Yes he is, young lady. Yes. He. Is.
9,662 of 9,881 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great compliment for my skin art,
1,299 of 1,374 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Three wolves is just two wolves plus another wolf,
6,030 of 6,483 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Video Proof of the Shirts Power!,
The Three Wolf Moon shirts power is obvious. This video is living proof that you will get women, and fly. Most importantly my son was born without bones and when I put this shirt on him he grew bones. Don't ask me how it happened but the magic is there. I wish I could hug the designer of this shirt and thank them for everything they have done for my family.
541 of 577 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Better,
1,450 of 1,561 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Never a Lone Wolf Again!,
When my order arrived, I was not disappointed. As the UPS truck was driving down the street with my delivery, my female neighbors began opening their doors and stepping outside. I suspect the Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt contains powerful lupine pheromones.
The shirt is made up of soft cotton. I was grateful to see this as it flexed as my muscles grew after donning this garment.
The Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt gave me a +10 resistance to energy attacks, +8 Strength, and added 30 feet to my normal leap. I cannot list the specific effects involving the opposite sex as I am still discovering these. And they are many.
Since owning the Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt, I have successfully solved 7 crimes in my city, including 4 cold case murders. The local police force is currently wishing to retain my services.
I do have one complaint, and that's that I must stay indoors on windy days. Last fall we had a windy day and I received notice that hundreds of women were suddenly pregnant, carrying my offspring, up to 12 miles away.
That said, I would whole-heartedly recommend the Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt. You never need to be a lone wolf again!
3,167 of 3,417 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Why can't Amazon have more stars? 5 ain't enough!,
I ordered next-day air (if only there was same day!), and, of course, a size smaller than usual to ensure the closeness of the wolves to my chest hair. When the package arrived, I tore it open, and I SWEAR angels sang. I think it was Freebird. I immediately removed my "No Fat Chicks" shirt, and replaced it with this finery. Lemme tell you: AW YEAH.
I'll spare the details of my conquests since I started wearing this shirt; suffice to say, I'm swimming in a sea of babes the likes of which are usually found on those K-Tel infomercials. I'm also more confident at work, and expect to be promoted to cashier soon. I owe everything to this shirt (I should say "shirts", since I now own 23 of them).
840 of 902 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars With Great Powers Comes Great Responsibility,
This review is from: The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee (Apparel)I admit it, I'm a ladies' man. And when you put this shirt on a ladies' man, it's like giving an AK-47 to a ninja. Sure it looks cool and probably would make for a good movie, but you know somebody is probably going to get hurt in the end (no pun intended). That's what almost happened to me, this is my story...
Yes... I remember it like it was yesterday...because it was yesterday. My mom had bought me this shirt because it matched the velvet painting hanging over my waterbed except my painting has wolves, the moon, AND an Indian man... on a horse. Deee-lux. At first, I thought nothing of the shirt other than finding agreeable the fine stitching of the seams and the effective use of negative space on the print. Then one Friday, I had a date with a gal that works at the swap meet. I landed the date by posing to her the question: "Hey baby, how about if we swap meat?" I made that up myself, that's how I operate. Her eyes rolled back trying to contain her excitement! To break her uncomfortable giddiness, I blurted out "How about I pick you up here at 8?". She replied "yeah, whatever"... SCORE!
7:30 rolls around and I find my lucky WWE shirt is covered with bondo from having worked on my Camaro the day before. Normally I would just flip it inside out and wear it, but the inverted silkscreen image of The Rock makes him look like Richard Pryor and a ladies man does not want Richard Pryor pressed against his chest when he's on a date. And so... I reprimanded my mom for not washing it (with a finger wag for added effect) and picked up my wolf-moon shirt and said to myself "Tommy (that's what I call myself, because it's my name)... Tommy, this will have to do." Boy did it do!
I grab the keys to my Camaro... ok... my mom's Camaro... and run out the door. Mom kicks open the screen door behind me and says "Where the hell is yous goin?" At this watershed moment in my life, I knew I had to think quick. I grabbed my little brother who was making mud pies in the front yard and said "Momma, I'm gonna take Timmy to Chuck E Cheese"... Off we go!
I stop by an abandoned parking lot where I sometimes shoot rats with my BB gun. I drag Timmy out of the car and he screams "I thought you were taking me to Chuck E Cheeezzz?" I pick up one of the dead rats I shot and said "This is Chuck E Cheese! Somebody must have burned it down and killed Chuck!" I threw the dead rat in his lap and as he sat motionless and sobbing uncontrollably, I jumped into the car, locked the door, and drove off. I could still see him crying in the rear-view as he cradled the rat, it was a nice warm feeling knowing he has learned to care for a fellow mammal like that.
When I arrive to pick up my date, I saw her duck behind the counter when she saw me. I couldn't believe how nervous she was! She couldn't even look me in the eye. That was the first sign of the power of this shirt, and I knew I had to be careful not to break her heart. I tried to calm her with casual conversation, but the more I spoke, the more flustered she would get - It was worse than I thought. Eventually she screamed out "You are so scary and weird!" "Scary and weird?" I thought to myself "Scary and weird????"... I looked down on my shirt, the black backdrop, the intriguing wolves, and realized that this shirt, like me, projected a Dark & Mysterious aura (or "scary and weird" as she put it). I was wise to what was going on here, this shirt plus my mojo was too much for her to handle. Before I could stop charming her with puckered lips, she spat in my face. Spat! We had exchanged bodily fluids only 5 minutes into our date! I didn't even know her name (that's how playas roll). In some countries that's illegal! I knew right then and there what I had to do...
I stood there, and all I could think about was that scene from Superman where he realizes that to be with Lois, he has to give up his super powers. Well my friend, I figuratively put that crystal in that thingamajig, and took off my wolf t-shirt freeing myself from these powers. The effects were immediate. As soon as the shirt was lifted from my svelte torso, her face went from red and flustered, to laughing and relaxed. We never spoke again though, I walked away knowing I saved a woman from certain heartbreak and the long string of bad relationships that comes with being damaged goods. It felt good, real good to have done the right thing. She smiled as I walked away, I think she was grateful too.
I am giving this product 5 stars because not everyone out there is a ladies' man. In the hands of lesser beings, it can help you find love. In the hands of a playa like me, it can only break hearts. That's why I say use with caution. I am passing the torch onto you, be careful out there folks.
1,441 of 1,552 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Synergy,Tuscan Whole Milk down the front of this shirt, and my soul was torn from my body and thrown into heaven by a jealous God.
Most Helpful First | Newest First
The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee by The Mountain
$18.95 $5.02 - $29.95