The New Codependency and over one million other books are available for Amazon Kindle. Learn more

FREE Shipping on orders over $25.

Used - Good | See details
Sold by Circle City.
 
   
Sell Us Your Item
For a $1.23 Gift Card
Trade in
Have one to sell? Sell yours here
Start reading The New Codependency on your Kindle in under a minute.

Don't have a Kindle? Get your Kindle here, or download a FREE Kindle Reading App.
Sorry, this item is not available in
Image not available for
Color:
Image not available

To view this video download Flash Player

 

The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation [Hardcover]

Melody Beattie
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (83 customer reviews)


Available from these sellers.


Formats

Amazon Price New from Used from
Kindle Edition $9.72  
Hardcover --  
Paperback $12.14  
MP3 CD Library Binding, Audiobook, MP3 Audio, Unabridged $20.58  
Audible Audio Edition, Unabridged $20.95 or Free with Audible 30-day free trial
Image
Save on Popular Books This Summer
Browse our Bookshelf Favorites store for big savings on popular fiction, nonfiction, children's books, and more.

Book Description

December 30, 2008
In "Codependent No More, " Melody Beattie introduced the world to the term "codependency." Now a modern classic, this book established Beattie as a pioneer in self-help literature and endeared her to millions of readers who longed for healthier relationships. Twenty-five years later concepts such as self-care and setting boundaries have become entrenched in mainstream culture. Now Beattie has written a followup volume, "The New Codependency, " which clears up misconceptions about codependency, identifies how codependent behavior has changed, and provides a new generation with a road map to wellness.

The question remains: What is and what is not codependency? Beattie here reminds us that much of codependency is normal behavior. It's about crossing lines. There are times we do too much, care too much, feel too little, or overly engage. Feeling resentment after giving is not the same as heartfelt generosity. Narcissism and self-love, enabling and nurturing, and controlling and setting boundaries are not interchangeable terms. In "The New Codependency, " Beattie explores these differences, effectively invoking her own inspiring story and those of others, to empower us to step out of the victim role forever. Codependency, she shows, is not an illness but rather a series of behaviors that once broken down and analyzed can be successfully combated.

Each section offers an overview of and a series of activities pertaining to a particular behavior -- caretaking, controlling, manipulation, denial, repression, etc. -- enabling us to personalize our own step-bystep guide to wellness. These sections, in conjunction with a series of tests allowing us to assess the level of our codependent behavior, demonstrate that while it may not seem possible now, we have the power to take care of ourselves, no matter what we are experiencing.

Punctuated with Beattie's renowned candor and intuitive wisdom, "The New Codependency" is an owner's manual to learning to be who we are and gives us the tools necessary to reclaim our lives by renouncing unhealthy practices.



Editorial Reviews

Review

[Audio Review] Lorna Raver's rich vocal personality captures the author's candor and wisdom in this follow-up volume to the classic CODEPENDENT NO MORE. Beattie describes current misconceptions of codependency, then makes observations on how the abuse of multiple substances has changed codependent tendencies. She explores how recovery from addictive behaviors and codependency is about personal responsibility, not blame. Raver delivers the author s simple examples of the difference between controlling behavior and normal behavior, as well as her reminder that behavioral change is often uncomfortable. The author calls this book an "owner's manual" that provides a "roadmap to wellness" that will help listeners turn behavioral deficits into assets. Overall, Raver delivers the author s encouraging remarks with warmth and clarity. Pen and notebook are suggested for quizzes and questionnaires. G.D.W. © AudioFile 2009, Portland, Maine --AudioFile --This text refers to the MP3 CD Library Binding edition.

About the Author

Melody Beattie, one of the seminal figures in the recovery movement, is the author of the international bestseller Codependent No More, which has sold over eight million copies and been translated into more than a dozen languages. An expert on codependency, Beattie has written fifteen books, including include Beyond Codependency, The Language of Letting Go, and The Grief Club, and lectures worldwide. She lives in Southern California. For more information visit her website at www.melodybeattie.com.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster; 1 edition (December 30, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1439101922
  • ISBN-13: 978-1439101926
  • Product Dimensions: 5.3 x 0.8 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (83 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #378,524 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Melody Beattie is one of America's most beloved self-help authors and a household name in addiction and recovery circles. Her international bestselling book, Codependent No More, introduced the world to the term "codependency" in 1986. Millions of readers have trusted Melody's words of wisdom and guidance because she knows firsthand what they're going through. In her lifetime, she has survived abandonment, kidnapping, sexual abuse, drug and alcohol addiction, divorce, and the death of a child. "Beattie understands being overboard, which helps her throw bestselling lifelines to those still adrift," said Time Magazine.

Melody was born in St. Paul, Minnesota in 1948. Her father left home when she was a toddler, and she was raised by her mother. She was abducted by a stranger at age four. Although she was rescued the same day, the incident set the tone for a childhood of abuse, and she was sexually abused by a neighbor throughout her youth. Her mother turned a blind eye, just as she had denied the occurrence of abuse in her own past.

"My mother was a classic codependent," Melody recalls. "If she had a migraine, she wouldn't take an aspirin because she didn't do drugs. She believed in suffering." Unlike her mother, Melody was determined to self-medicate her emotional pain. Beattie began drinking at age 12, was a full-blown alcoholic by age 13, and a junkie by 18, even as she graduated from high school with honors. She ran with a crowd called "The Minnesota Mafia" who robbed pharmacies to get drugs. After several arrests, a judge mandated that she had to "go to treatment for as long as it takes or go to jail."

Melody continued to score drugs in treatment until a spiritual epiphany transformed her. "I was on the lawn smoking dope when the world turned this purplish color. Everything looked connected--like a Monet painting. It wasn't a hallucination; it was what the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous calls 'a spiritual awakening.' Until then, I'd felt entitled to use drugs. I finally realized that if I put half as much energy into doing the right thing as I had into doing wrong, I could do anything," Beattie said.

After eight months of treatment, Melody left the hospital clean and sober, ready to take on new goals: helping others get sober, and getting married and having a family of her own. She married a former alcoholic who was also a prominent and respected counselor and had two children with him. Although she had stopped drinking and using drugs, she found herself sinking in despair. She discovered that her husband wasn't sober; he'd been drinking and lying about it since before their marriage.

During her work with the spouses of addicts at a treatment center, she realized the problems that had led to her alcoholism were still there. Her pain wasn't about her husband or his drinking; it was about her. There wasn't a word for codependency yet. While Melody didn't coin the term codependency, she became passionate about the subject. What was this thing we were doing to ourselves?

Driven into the ground financially by her husband's alcoholism, Melody turned a life-long passion for writing into a career in journalism, writing about the issues that had consumed her for years. Her 24-year writing career has produced fifteen books published in twenty languages and hundreds of newspaper and magazine articles. She has been a frequent guest on many national television shows, including Oprah. She and her books continue to be featured regularly in national publications including Time, People, and most major periodicals around the world.

Although it almost destroyed her when her twelve-year-old son Shane died in a ski accident in 1991, eventually Melody picked up the pieces of her life again. "I wanted to die, but I kept waking up alive," she says. She began skydiving, mountain-climbing, and teaching others what she'd learned about grief.

Customer Reviews

This book has helped me understand why I do the things I do. REBCCA E SIRIGIANO  |  9 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
119 of 123 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great addition to the topic September 21, 2009
Format:Hardcover
"The New Codependency" is the newest addition to the volume of work published by Melody Beattie. She was one of the first to identify codependency as a problem and provide information on the subject to a large audience of readers. The first book she wrote, "Codependent No More", was originally published in 1987. This book does not replace that one, it just expands on the topic and adds additional insight to the problem of codependency.

If you are new to the subject and just getting familiar with it, I would definitely recommend you start with "Codependent No More". After you are further along in your journey, this book makes a lot of sense but I don't think it is the right place to start. It really builds upon the concepts presented in the first book and there is a subtlety to it that is best appreciated after having done some work in this area already.

As in all her books, I need to sit with a highlighter and use it freely. I also dog ear pages as I go for quick reference back when I need to review. I read it straight through and then went back and took some of the quizzes offered which was really helpful. After reading it once, it is definitely not going back on the book shelf. There are a lot of activities outlined to do to help the reader address and access issues he/she is dealing with. It is almost as if there is a workbook contained within its pages. I will continue to use it as a reference/workbook for many months to come, I am sure.

Anyone who has identified themselves as a codependent (or is dealing with a codependent) will benefit greatly from this book. She conveys her message is a loving, caring way versus a list of "shoulds" which is exactly what a codependent needs. A couple of my favorite passages:

"We're giving to get. We give to get people to need us because we don't feel loveable. Caretaking attaches people to us, creating dependent relationships."

"Another communication problem is draining energy or power from someone under the guise of "talking." People may act like they want to have a conversation with us, but many people with codependency issues use conversation as a way to get us to take care of them."

The two books truly are the gold standard on this topic.
Was this review helpful to you?
74 of 78 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A helpful update of ideas May 19, 2009
By PJ
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase
Presents a needed update on thinking regarding codependency. This book addressed many of the problems I've had with the concepts of "codependency" over the years. Activities and quizzes give reader a way to put ideas into action in their lives. Probably not for someone new to Melody Beattie's work or learning about codependency in general - start at the beginning with Codependent No More or the daily readers. A strong addition to Melody's library.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
30 of 32 people found the following review helpful
By Evin
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
After reading Women Who Love too Much, Codependent No More, Beyond Codependency, I still felt had unsolved issues and unanswered questions. This book answered them all! My realization of its success was after months when I realized its positive super effect on me. I watched my gradual behaviour change which made me a happier person. The friends who I passed this book over also feel relieved about their unsolved and leftout issues after reading it. I advise it to everyone who feel they need to read a bit more about Codependency...
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars God & Life are working for You!
This is a great book for folks who have family or work place issues with drama, manipulation, blame, and boundaries. Read more
Published 9 days ago by Cornelia Delee
2.0 out of 5 stars Redundant and apologetic
I read her original edition and found it somewhat helpful. This "guide" seems filled with apologies for whatever she heard was not quite accepted in her first book. Read more
Published 12 days ago by susan ward
3.0 out of 5 stars Wasn't the right book for me
I got this book to help me after my divorce. I'm an atheist and this just didn't work for me. I found a different book that really addressed my issues and helped me see where I... Read more
Published 13 days ago by Karen Lowe
5.0 out of 5 stars Very insightful
Love this book. I am a therapist and this book was good for me to read personally and great for clients! It is very user friendly, profound and yet simply explained. Read more
Published 13 days ago by Angela White
5.0 out of 5 stars Changed
My psychotherapist recommended this book the day she explained the term "codependent" to me. This has been the most influential book of my life. Read more
Published 17 days ago by J. Chestnut
4.0 out of 5 stars Modernized sequel to Codependent No More
Worth reading both. I got more out of this book, but the other sets the foundation and is referred to often. Read more
Published 17 days ago by VanillaRed
5.0 out of 5 stars Very good read!
My boyfriend thought it would be a good read for us since we clicked and carried on rather quickly in our budding relationship. It was a great read with a lot to think about! Read more
Published 21 days ago by Chelsea Harrell
5.0 out of 5 stars Great update encompassing all aspects
This has been a wonderful reminder for me and love that it really shows codependent behaviors in many areas of our lives. Not just "relationships". Read more
Published 1 month ago by Stacey T
5.0 out of 5 stars Melody Beattie my hero
I am in awe of this book, I did not know she could improve on Codependent no more, but she did.
Published 1 month ago by yoli
5.0 out of 5 stars A must ready
For anyone who suffers from co-dependency you will find peace and serenity...a comradrie in this pages of this book. You are not alone.
Published 1 month ago by Lisa B.
Search Customer Reviews
Only search this product's reviews

What Other Items Do Customers Buy After Viewing This Item?


Forums

There are no discussions about this product yet.
Be the first to discuss this product with the community.
Start a new discussion
Topic:
First post:
Prompts for sign-in
 





Look for Similar Items by Category