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The Old Limey Paperback – February 1, 2002

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

British humor meets American flair in a wacky comedy involving a retired British general, a kidnapped young lady, two California beach beauties and a Jamaican drug gang. After spending his life in Her Majesty's Army, at the age of 60 Nigel Haversham is just beginning to think of settling down with a glass of fine sherry and a woman at his side. Unfortunately for him, his goddaughter Alexandra has run off to California with her drug-dealing boyfriend, Sean Stalker, and her mother calls upon Nigel to find and return her safely to England. Approaching the disappearance like a military maneuver, Nigel heads for L.A., enlisting the aid of April and Penelope, two beautiful, ex-cheerleading Gen-Xers whom he literally falls over at an outdoor restaurant. Nigel plans to smoke out Stalker, torture him for information and quietly arrange to take Alexandra back home. But Stalker is also being hunted by Jamaican thugs, whose money he stole, Alexandra is kidnapped by a Mexican drug gang (intent on forcing Stalker to purchase their drugs) and one of Nigel's American beauties runs off with Stalker, leaving Nigel with no weapons, no leads and no Alexandra. The eccentric Nigel is a hoot, as is the book's riotous surprise ending. Armed with blurbs by Christopher Buckley and The French Connection's Robin Moore, this comedy from the author of the business bestseller Robert E. Lee on Leadership should sell particularly well to Anglophiles and connoisseurs of tart humor. (Jan. 15)
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

From Booklist

Charm fairly drips off this amusing first novel about a retired British military officer who comes to the shores of the U.S and faces and ultimately overcomes the cultural differences between his country and ours. Nigel Haversham journeys from overcast and chilly London to the sunny skies and palm trees of L.A. for the express purpose of locating his goddaughter, a young woman only in her twenties who has disappeared for scary reasons. As we find out, her boyfriend is in trouble with a drug-dealing group back in England, and it could be that Nigel's goddaughter followed the young man to California either to be with him or because she realized that staying in England could spell trouble for her, too. Nigel enlists the aid of two young women he just happens to meet upon arriving in California, and together they manage to leap over, scurry around, and out-and-out dodge all the obstacles placed in their path by the drug gang and reconcile Nigel with his beloved goddaughter. Brad Hooper
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 340 pages
  • Publisher: Regnery Publishing (February 1, 2002)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0895261626
  • ISBN-13: 978-0895261625
  • Product Dimensions: 0.8 x 5.5 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 15.7 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (19 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,066,960 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful By David M. Scott on February 19, 2001
Format: Hardcover
Hysterical character conflict in this terrific book is set up from the first pages. Our befuddled Englishman meets a couple of beach bunnies and we're off for a wild romp with impossibly funny situations coming at a quick clip. Crocker knows his California babes well and his English Gentlemen better - pace, language and action are nearly flawless. Too often inter-cultural conflict hams up or misses the mark on one or the other sides. It would be great to see an opposite side of the pond version from Crocker. How about a Walter Matthau-type traveling to London and mingling for a few weeks with a couple of Sloan Rangers?
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful By Jeffrey Leach HALL OF FAME on September 24, 2003
Format: Hardcover
Retired British General Nigel Haversham just cannot seem to rid his life of problems. First, his precious goddaughter Alexandra ran off to America in pursuit of her shiftless boyfriend Sean, one of those sensitive, left leaning artists a rigid old guard conservative like Haversham despises with the heat of a million suns. When Alexandra's mother asks Nigel to go to America and track down her daughter, he readily agrees. Almost as soon as Haversham steps off the plane in California, the problems wash over him in an unending wave: he crashes his rental car after imbibing too much liquor, bringing in the unwanted attentions of the local constabulary. Since Nigel is English and promises to go home soon, the policeman lets him off with a warning. Quickly following this unpleasant escapade, the old general has a chance encounter with two beautiful California girls named Penelope and April who grudgingly agree to assist Nigel in his mission to find Alexandra. The adventures that follow twist and turn at a frenetic pace: Nigel meets up with a gang of Jamaican drug dealers, battles a gang of Latino drug dealers, disguises himself as "Bongo Topaz," a Don King look alike in order to infiltrate a nightclub, rescues one of his girls from a kidnapping attempt, and drinks enough alcohol to float the QE2 up the river Thames. Nigel Haversham, a man who helped plot strategy with Norman Schwarzkopf during the Persian Gulf War, never imagined rescuing his goddaughter would be so difficult.
This crude summary of H.W. Crocker's "The Old Limey" barely scratches the surface of this amusing and oftentimes whimsical story. All of the action centers on Nigel, of course, a man who suffers from frequent delusions of grandeur coupled with a roving eye for beautiful young women.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Lissy Friedman on May 11, 2001
Format: Hardcover
The advance hype of The Old Limey, by H.W. Crocker, III, billed the author as "a latter-day P.G. Wodehouse," which, as a devoted reader of Wodehouse and a participant in a Wodehouse usenet group, piqued my interest and had me stampeding for dibs on reviewing this book. But as I read the book, its style and tone reminded me less of Wodehouse than of Thomas Pynchon, legendary purveyor of hallucinogenic fiction filled with themes of global, geo-political conspiracy and Armageddon on the one hand and the minutia of the lives of its warped, twisted characters on the other hand. The Old Limey fits well into that genre of total lunacy mixed with a political message.
The story begins with Brigadier General Nigel Haversham's odyssey from the stuffy, dusty clubs of England to the barrios of Los Angeles to rescue and recover his goddaughter who has been kidnapped by her boyfriend's drug dealer cohorts. General Haversham (the eponymous Old Limey) has a rich fantasy life based upon embellished reminiscences of his years as an "old campaigner" in the various outposts of the British colonies. In certain respects, he does resemble a Wodehouse character in his slavish devotion to better times "when men were men," and the sun never set on the British Empire. Wodehouse himself preferred to place his stories in an unidentifiable era placed between the great World Wars, in which certain standards prevailed and nothing ever changed, even when he was writing for readers born generations later. General Haversham dwells mainly in the past and his actions are driven by old mores that seem curiously fresh and exotic to the thoroughly modern characters he encounters in Los Angeles -- his values and tactics are so old, they're new.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Egbert F. Bhatty on April 17, 2004
Format: Paperback
The Old Limey is easily the first great comic novel of the 21st century! It's a high-speed comedy, American-style. Which means that from the moment Nigel Haversham, a gung-ho retired British general, lands in Los Angels to rescue his goddaughter, Alexandra, who has followed her drug-dealing boyfriend Sean there, it's all go-go-go!
Finding Alexandra is the least of Haversham's problems. First, he has to contend with the problems of Penelope and April, a couple of Valley girls, who get hooked up with him in the quest. Then, there are the problems of dealing with the California cops, the Black Muslims, a Jamaican drug gang, a Mexican drug cartel and - Penelope's dad!
But Haversham is a man with a plan for every contingency. In fact, at the heart of this hilarious novel are Haversham's bumbling plans. But, so full is he of optimism that we are swept away with him to the end. It's an end with not one - but two! - startling surprises!
Loaded with insights into the workings of old-fashioned British and new-fangled America societies, The Old Limey is a light-hearted romp that will be enjoyed by readers on both side of the Pond. Mr Crocker's writing style is such that you're not so much reading words off a page as experiencing a delightful musical comedy in your head!
This is a book that will not dull with the passage of time.
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