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(Aston) insight is extraordinary and her positive attitude and strategies for successful relationships make this an essential guide for couples. -- Dr. Tony Attwood<br /><br />Her insight is extraordinary and her positive attitude and strategies make this an essential guide. --Dr. Tony Atwood
About the Author
Maxine Ashton is a qualified relationship counselor specializing in the area of autism spectrum disorders.
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Product Details
Paperback: 88 pages
Publisher: Autism Asperger Publishing Company (February 11, 2002)
My partner and I are both on the autistic spectrum, and I can't even begin to describe how valuable this book was for me (she hasn't read it yet, but plans to do so soon). The first half is mainly about diagnosis. That didn't apply in our case, since we were already diagnosed, so I don't feel qualified to comment on that setion. The second half, however, is a gold mine of information on how to address one of the most important parts of any relationship: communication. Those on the autistic spectrum communicate differently from the "neurologically typical". This book gets right into the "meat" of this matter by clearly and frankly explaining the different ways in which an "Aspie" (one with Asperger's Syndrome) interprets and uses language. It also explains strategies for both parties to use in bridging the communication gap -- rightly observing, by the way, that the Aspie partner needs to make an effort just as much as the non-Aspie partner does. In addition, "Other Half" notes some other potential problems that may occur in your relationship (e.g., odd compulsive routines and how to deal with them) as well as certain strengths your Aspie partner will probably bring to your relationship that can be difficult to find in others. If you or your partner have Asperger's Syndrome, this is not a book for you to miss.
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99 of 103 people found the following review helpful
This book is extremely helpful and supportive for those who have a Asperger spouse or significant other. It is very straight forward and tells it like it is. It was wonderful to know that I was not the only one who had to manage so many different aspects of our family's lives, but is realistic in explaining why it is necessary. The book in not depressing, but realistic in the difficulities and benefits of this type of relationship. A good book to help you take charge and make sure that YOU also take care of yourself and know when to ask for some help. I think this is a must read for anyone who lives with someone with Aspergers. It will really explain many of the things you may already do to support your spouse and why they work so well. This book would have saved me a lot of time and tears when I first got married. A quick read and excellent book.
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121 of 127 people found the following review helpful
Unlike "An Asperger Marriage", this book offers explanation and advice in hopes of developing understanding. My wife has found herself repeatedly experiencing "Aha's" as it becomes clear to her that I am not just an odd duck. If you only buy one book about relationships in context of Aspergers Syndrome, THIS IS THE ONE! I hope you find as much help and encouragement as my wife and I have.
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54 of 57 people found the following review helpful
I especially bought this book for my husband, so he will be able to understand me better, but I've read it first. It was such a relief to read, that the problems we are experiencing in our relationship aren't really my 'fault'! People always assume that I don't care, and treat them the way I do on purpose, because I am selfish, which upsets me terribly. Because nothing could be further from the truth. Ms. Aston sets the record straight. I believe that her advice and strategies will make a big difference in our marriage. I hope that my kids will read it too, as they need to face the truth as to why it is sometimes impossible for me to tolerate a sleepover with giggly girls (especially when I didn't have a moments peace all day, because my youngest will talk and beg and never leave me alone, until I don't want to see another human being for a week!). The only problem with this book is, that it is all from the perspective of a normal woman being married to an Aspie husband, because she only interviewed two women with Asperger's, who didn't have any kids. That's a pity, because instead of the normal women having to raise the kids alone, I had to raise five kids pretty much on my own, which must be the most stressful thing imaginable for an Aspie. I don't believe anybody I know appreciates what it meant for me to raise five normal children, who actually turned into extremely capable, normal adults (except for the youngest, who is only 12, but is one of the most happy, self confident kids around). This book also made me realize, that I must be misunderstanding others frequently, when they say things they don't really mean. Her examples are often funny and made me laugh about the way I am, too. It's good not to make everything too serious, because it makes this book easy to read and enjoyable.
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42 of 44 people found the following review helpful
This book makes a number of quite valuable and interesting points about Asperger's and coping with it in daily life. I found it a very useful source of insights. Certainly a number of the issues raised in this book strongly resonated with my own experiences.
One positive item about this book is that in being about intimate relationships it necessarily focuses on the issues of adults with AS. Although all writers agree that AS is a permanent condition, I have found this group to be very much underserved in the material I see, in books and on the web, regarding AS, which is overwhelmingly aimed at parents of AS children.
Another positive is that it is quite short, clearly written, and easy to read in only a few hours. The book is done well enough that I would have welcomed more, but shortness will be convenient for most readers. And by keeping the focus narrow, enough information is presented on the topic under discussion that the reader will still find a thorough treatment.
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