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The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times (Shambhala Library) [Hardcover]

Pema Chodron
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (87 customer reviews)

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Book Description

August 9, 2005 Shambhala Library
We always have a choice, Pema Chödrön teaches: We can let the circumstances of our lives harden us and make us increasingly resentful and afraid, or we can let them soften us and make us kinder. Here, Pema provides tools to deal with the problems and difficulties that life throws our way. This wisdom is always available to us, she teaches, but we usually block it with habitual patterns rooted in fear. Beyond that fear lies a state of openheartedness and tenderness. This book teaches us how to awaken our basic goodness and connect with others, to accept ourselves and others—complete with faults and imperfections, and to stay in the present moment by seeing through the strategies of ego that cause us to resist life as it is.

Frequently Bought Together

The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times (Shambhala Library) + When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times (Shambhala Library) + Living Beautifully: with Uncertainty and Change
Price for all three: $40.92

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Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Pema Chödrön may have more good one-liners than a Groucho Marx retrospective, but this nun's stingers go straight to the heart: "The essence of bravery is being without self-deception"; "When we practice generosity, we become intimate with our grasping"; "Difficult people are the greatest teachers." These are the punctuations to specific teachings of fearlessness. In The Places That Scare You, Chödrön introduces a host of the compassionate warriors' tools and concepts for transforming anxieties and negative emotions into positive living. Rather than steeling ourselves against hardship, she suggests we open ourselves to vulnerability; from this comes the loving kindness and compassion that are the wellsprings of joy. How do we achieve it? Through meditation, mindfulness, slogans, aspiration, and several other practices, such as tonglen, which is taking in the pain and suffering of others while sending out happiness to all--emphasis on the all. Chödrön introduces each of these practices in turn, backing them up with succinct practical reasoning and a framework of ideas that offers fresh interpretations of familiar words like strength, laziness, and groundlessness. Chödrön is the type of person you'd like to have with you in an emergency, and to deal with the extremes of daily life. In her absence, The Places That Scare You will do nicely. --Brian Bruya --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

The Places That Scare You by Pema Chodron. Chodron, a Buddhist nun, offers plans of action for coping with anxiety, fear and uncertainty.

Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 176 pages
  • Publisher: Shambhala; 1 edition (August 9, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1590302656
  • ISBN-13: 978-1590302651
  • Product Dimensions: 4.6 x 0.8 x 7.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (87 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #11,661 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Pema Chödrön is an American Buddhist nun in the lineage of Chögyam Trungpa. She is resident teacher at Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia, the first Tibetan monastery in North America established for Westerners. She is also the author of many books and audiobooks, including the best-selling When Things Fall Apart and Don't Bite the Hook.

Customer Reviews

The whole book is overflowing with wise, gentle advise or wisdom as I prefer to call it. Beth DeRoos  |  23 reviewers made a similar statement
It is a book helpful to life and the goodness of life. Francisco X. Stork  |  12 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
155 of 158 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Be. Here. Now. November 16, 2002
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase
In the current age of anxiety, Pema Chödrön is both a refreshing and challenging voice. Basically, she encourages us to see problems as spiritual opportunities. Instead of trying to run from discomfort, she advocates staying put and learning about ourselves. Instead of habitually reaching for whatever palliative gives relief -- always temporary -- she suggests feeling and observing our discomforts, becoming more fully present in our lives, learning how to be truly here now. Only through this process, she says, can we experience the deep joy of being alive.

This is a great companion volume to her book "When Things Fall Apart." It elaborates on themes introduced there, describing several practices of Tibetan Buddhism, some ancient and long forgotten, which help us not only cope with anxiety but use it to overcome fearfulness. This is an important spiritual effort because while we typically think of hate as the enemy of love, it is really fear that makes love difficult. Fear immobilizes us, makes us pull the covers over our heads, and isolates us from others.

Chödrön, a student of Chögyam Trungpa, encourages the consistent practice of meditation. And she discounts the usual results-driven expectations people associate with it, pointing out that as we confront our true selves in meditation, it often becomes more and more difficult, not easier. And for those who have found meditation fiercely frustrating, as I have, she has alternatives. The practice of "tonglen" is one simple spiritual ritual that can be done anywhere, anytime, providing a dramatic and freeing shift in emotional perspective. Learning not to let disappointment, anger, and hurt trigger our personal melodramas, which sap our energy, we can find our way to greater equanimity and become a less destructive presence in the world.

I strongly recommend this book as a welcome spiritual tonic in troubled times, whether that trouble originates elsewhere or from within. As with her other books, you can read and reread it, each time discovering much to learn and reflect on -- and in her words, "this is news you can use."

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132 of 137 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Profound, practical guide to attaining wisdom April 20, 2002
Format:Hardcover
I've read this book three times in two weeks. I read so many books about wisdom. The Four Agreements (not so good), meditation by Jack Kornfeld books, Nietzche, Don't Sweat the Small Stuff. I've read Pema Chodron's previous books, and those didn't speak to me as deeply as this one does. I don't read just to pass the time. I read to find wisdom. This book contains deep wisdom.
The author lays out ways to analyze ourselves, our emotions and our thoughts. She discusses how we as humans react to our thoughts and pain. Her book analyzes the causes and roots of suffering. She then asks "why do must people suffer in such a similar way?". Decades of acquired wisdom are then offered.
The causes and roots of suffering are our fleeing from pain, running for comfort. Fleeing without knowing why, fleeing without knowing where we are going. The descriptions of human behaivor are spot on accurate. This describes so many Western philosophers, political reformers, talented artists, and many people who are looking to find 'the one true way'.
After laying out the causes of suffering, she distills her understanding of human behaivor, and gives us ways to approach these problems. Practical, approachable ways that you can build on over time. This isn't a set of principles of "Look at the world with happiness, and you too will be happy", or a collection of trite sayings to convince yourself "You're good enough, you're smart enough, and doggone it, people like you". Slogans don't allow us to analyze and understand the root causes of our pain and suffering. This book lays out those causes. And it lays out ways we can study suffering, and use our efforts to transform our lives from unsure, troubled beings to people who have a firm grasp of themselves. This self understanding leads to lots of confidence. And she uses a scientific method for this analysis.
There are two books i read over and over. "Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind", which i've been learning from regularly for 4 years. And now this one.
Suzuki Roshi said 'We are always looking for something, without knowing what we are doing'. We are looking for happiness. This book studies what is happiness, what is suffering, why is it so temporal, and what can i do about attaining it.
And it helps us understand what we are doing.

May you benefit from this wisdom as much as I have.

"Science is best defined as a careful, disciplined, logical search for knowledge about any and all aspects of the universe, obtained by examination of the best available evidence and always subject to correction and improvement upon discovery of better evidence. What's left is magic. And it doesn't work."
--James Randi

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77 of 80 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars OPEN YOUR HEART AND YOU RELEASE SUFFERING! September 18, 2001
Format:Hardcover
Pema Chodron, a Tibetan Buddhis nun, is the one inspirational person you would choose to have with you when your world falls apart. Being a follower of Buddhist Philosophies for many years, I have found inner peace, strength, love and fulfillment through my beliefs. Each one of us must find "enlightenment" from whatever source we alone believe in, but for me, personally, Buddhism has been the answer. As the author reminds us, "Loving kindness comes from opening ourselves to vulnerability."

Meditation, mindfulness and practices such as "tonglen" (taking in the pain and suffering of others while sending out happiness) can be key tools in ridding ourselves of negativity, anxiety and fear. Each of us has within us the power to overcome that which causes us fear. Chodron explains how we can use these tools to overcome almost any obstacle or challenge.

Another book by the same author which is highly recommended is "When Things Fall Apart." Both offer excellent words of wisdom and advice and both are deserving of a five-star rating. Chodron is a teacher, a sage, an inspirationalist, a mentor and a prime example of one who is good, compassionate, understanding, kind and loving.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Pema never disappoints
Down home wisdom from a woman who has lived the usual trial and tribulations for most women. A great book. Something to cherish and read again and again.
Published 22 days ago by joan lorenz
5.0 out of 5 stars A book to be read twice (at least)
This is a book that will challenge the reader to deepen his or her practice. Even though this book discusses the basics of meditation, I don't recommend tackling it until you've... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Gregory Woodhouse
5.0 out of 5 stars The Places that Scare You book
Pema Chodron is a favorite author of mine and I love her books. They provide very practical information that can be applied to many situations. Highly recommended. Thank you.
Published 1 month ago by Sheryl A. Oconnortaylor
5.0 out of 5 stars Great!
Pema is great at explaining highly intellectual ideas in terms any lay person can appreciate. She is a wonderful teacher and a voice of sanity and reason. Read more
Published 1 month ago by E. Cook
5.0 out of 5 stars Grateful for this book ~
I am savoring this book and finding it very helpful. I touch base with it nearly every day and find it particularly easy to read on my new tablet where I can highlight and quickly... Read more
Published 2 months ago by WNC reader
5.0 out of 5 stars phenomenal book
Even if you aren't necessarily interested in buddhist teachings, Chodron breaks it down in a way that will appeal to both secular and non secular readers. Read more
Published 2 months ago by B. McGraw
5.0 out of 5 stars GREAT book!
Coaches us how to weather the storms of emotional waves and discomfort. This woman truly walks her talk. A must read!
Published 2 months ago by Jason
5.0 out of 5 stars Practical, spiritual
One of the most useful books I've come across on how to live a fulfilled spiritual life, regardless of path or recovery issue. Read more
Published 2 months ago by MamaDog
5.0 out of 5 stars I haven't quite finished this book but enjoy what I have read so far.
I ordered this book because it was referred to me from a friend I have read it somewhat. I go to different chapters and take what I can from it. thank you Amazon.
Published 3 months ago by patrick welch
4.0 out of 5 stars ok
Some practical information. Kind of boils down to, Don't worry be happy. Easy to understand. Keeps your attention. Not sure it will change my life. We'll see.
Published 3 months ago by Cheryl
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