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The Relationship Rescue Workbook: Exercises and Self-Tests to Help You Reconnect with Your Partner Paperback – October 18, 2000
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Don't expect to approach this workbook as if you were whizzing through a magazine quiz. Like the relationship that you are trying to revive, this workbook presents a big commitment. (There's no timeline suggested, but judging from the amount of work involved, common sense says to give it at least a month.) McGraw also urges readers to use this workbook in tandem with Relationship Rescue, even though there are similar exercises in both books. The hardcover book is geared toward helping readers identify "what's wrong and begin the process of restoration," he explains. The workbook helps readers begin the self-scrutinizing work that leads to change. Throughout this 287-page workbook, McGraw asks readers to be brutally honest while they examine the beliefs, behaviors, resentments, and expectations that they bring to the relationship. The four-part structure echoes the structure of his original book, starting with "Recover Your Core" and finishing with "Aim for the Best." Some of the exercises seem predictable, such as "list and describe five things that made you fall in love with your partner." Most of the time, though, the requests are profound and suggest a huge impact on a relationship. For example:
- "I am 100 percent accountable for my life, so I will take a responsibility for bringing a win/win spirit to the table day after day. I can show my optimism by..."
- "My partner does not deserve the effort I am about to invest. I deserve it, and our relationship deserves it. I will take the respect I have for our relationship and exercise it toward my partner. Some simple ways I can demonstrate the respect I hope to be shown myself are..."
This workbook won't change your partner or offer you relationship perfection, warns McGraw. The goal is "to reconnect with your own best self" (which is the foundation of McGraw's couples work). Nor is there a big prize upon completing the workbook. Instead, readers will find a personal letter from McGraw, emphasizing what's already been discovered--relationships aren't maintained and nurtured by a one-shot course, but rather by a strong commitment to one's highest self. It may sound anticlimactic, but as so many Oprah guests are likely to attest, it really works. --Gail Hudson
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Top Customer Reviews
I recently finished reading Frankenstein, which wonderfully explores the pain that lacking loving human companionship brings. The pain of losing what was once loving may be even worse.
In Dr. Phil's own words, "The two books are designed to be companions." "The hardcover book offers you the information and the tools you need . . . ." "The workbook gives you a totally private place to complete a wide variety of exercises that are crucial to the process. Some of these exercises appear in the hardcover book, but many do not."
His promise to you is a significant one. "Read the book and do the work, and you will reclaim the power to shape the life you live . . . . you will reconnect with your old best self."
While many workbooks claim to be coordinated with book they support, this one does an excellent job of connection. Each section begins with directions of how to use the hardcover book as an introduction to that part of the workbook. So you will need both.
Like Relationship Rescue, this workbook deserves many more than five stars.Read more ›
I would not hesitate to recommend both the hardcover book and workbook to any couple experiencing relationship difficulties, or to any couple who simply want to strengthen the bond with their soulmate. As a counsellor, I have found one of the biggest obstacles encountered in relationships is the ability to communicate with their partner in a respectful, honest, understanding and open way. Communication is not just a matter of verbal speaking, it also includes listening and respecting the other's opinion, and trying to understand their point of view even though you might not agree with what they are saying. When a problem surfaces within a relationship, it is important for both parties to accept the fact there is a problem and be in agreement that they both want to work together on strengthening and/or rebuilding the relationship. If one tries and the other does not, the end result will not be satisfying, and frustration, anger and resentment will likely increase. If you are both committed to improvement, you will find this well-planned workbook is bound to open new doors, break down a few barriers, and put you on a positive and constructive path to improvement. You have very little to lose and everything to gain.
While I like his "no-nonsense" approach - I also find that there are other books with a more balanced as well as spiritual approach that were also very helpful as well as as profound for me in my relationship. The two books that I am thinking of are not usually what people think of as "Relationship" Books but I highly recommend them. 1) The Mastery of Love, by Ruiz; and 2) Working On Yourself Doesn't Work, by A. and S. Kane. Both these books have deep insights about how to be more truthful, how to have more compassion, and how to not get caught in being "right", and to learn how to stop fighting your partner/lover/mate...and how to have harmony and happiness.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
had my doubts when i realized that it was a "dr phil" book. the philosophy is to break you down first, then try and rebuild you. Read morePublished 24 days ago by Amazon Customer
I bought this book for my son and daughter-in-law....they are divorced now :oPublished 28 days ago by Patti Hopp
I think things like this would work if you both do it all the way through :) when one give up and thinks it too much work the no this won't work. Read morePublished 3 months ago by S. O.