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The Script: The 100% Absolutely Predictable Things Men Do When They Cheat Paperback – April 19, 2006

56 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Vicky Mainzer and Elizabeth Landers met as co-chairs for the San Francisco University High School’s Decorator Showcase fundraiser back in the 1980s. Elizabeth has been the general manager of the San Francisco Daily Journal, a stockbroker, a banker, the president of San Francisco Haddasah, and a fulltime mother. She lives in Grosse Pointe, Michigan, and New York City. Vicky has been a nurse, an event planner, and a hospital director of volunteers, and a full-time mother. A community service leader, she was recently named a Brightest Star of Idaho by Governor Kempthorne. She now resides in her hometown of Pocatello, Idaho.

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 192 pages
  • Publisher: Hyperion (April 19, 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1401308422
  • ISBN-13: 978-1401308421
  • Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (56 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,327,498 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

37 of 38 people found the following review helpful By Elisabeth on November 5, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is divided into 2 parts. Part 1 is the script a man follows when contemplating committing adultery and when already committing it. Part 2 is the script he follows when leaving his wife for his mistress and what his life is like once with her.

In Part 1, the authors advise women to act like doctors, treating the pain early while the problem is still "small". This entails either stopping a man from committing adultery or if he already has, stopping him from leaving with the mistress. They accomplish this by being attractive, keeping the home neat and comfortable, and showing him lots of appreciation and attention.

The problem with this advice is it implies men cheat because of something a woman lacks...when really, it's what the cheater lacks: good character. When people have good character, they solve problems by being honest and playing fair.

The other problem with this advice is it encourages women to compete with mistresses, which is unrealistic. Unless a wife is willing to absolve men of all marital and parental responsibilities, she can't mimic what he has with a mistress. Again, this is more focus away from the real problem (lack of good character) in favor of quick fix solutions.

Another problem was telling women to be grateful if a man communicates in a rude and critical way because at least he's communicating. But that's not communicating; that's bullying. Rationalizing hurtful behavior pardons a man from growing up, which he could do if given the chance. There's no guarantee, of course. He could still run off with a less challenging woman, but at least she handled the situation with her dignity intact.

In Part 2, the advice gets better.
Read more ›
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34 of 37 people found the following review helpful By Jane's Joe on April 26, 2005
Format: Hardcover
I heard two ladies speaking of this book in a cafe yesterday. Apparently it is hot off the press, but I found it easily at a local book store. I thought it might be interesting because I am the ex-husband of a woman I cheated on. I opened it and finished it within a few hours becuause I couldn't believe my eyes! Reading the "Script" was an insight into my own behavior. I was caught on a behavioral roller coaster, not even aware of my own actions, comments, treatment of my wife. I actually ACTED out the "Script". Had I or my wife realized which "scene" I was in/on, we may have been able to twart the final result...I cheated and she left me. Not every man may follow the "Script" exactly because each man is an individual. He may enter "stage left" or "stage right." However I think any couple in crisis, especially where the man (or even woman) is/will be cheating, will find contents and resources in this book helpful to save the marraige/relationship before it's too late. I know I wish I had known I was acting the "Script" before it was too late.
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29 of 33 people found the following review helpful By O. Merce Brown HALL OF FAMETOP 500 REVIEWERVINE VOICE on June 27, 2005
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase

This book is a quick and comforting read for those women who suspect their husbands may be cheating or for those women who are going through a divorce. I enjoyed it too, though, because I feel that it will prepare me should I ever be in this situation.

The basic premise of the book is that men who cheat follow a predictable Script, and that they always have followed this Script throughout history, always telling women the same things in order to relieve themselves of guilt and make themselves look good. Men will do most anything to make themselves look good and come out on top, even things that would be out of character for them when they were married and devoted---I agree with this assertion from the book (based on my own personal experience).

While it's true that this book is not based upon scientific studies, it is based upon anecdotal experience that every woman is familiar with if she has ever had a friend, sister, or mother who has been betrayed by their spouse. I think the book is incredibly valuable because it helps the betrayed woman not feel alone, not feel like she is "unstable" or going crazy, not feel like it's all her problem.

If you know of someone who is trying to survive betrayal and/or divorce by a cheating husband, or if you even suspect this, it would be a great book for both you and for her.

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17 of 19 people found the following review helpful By Karen Anderson on April 22, 2005
Format: Hardcover
I read The Script and thoroughly enjoyed it. It was easy to understand and easy to read. A womens biggest fear is that her husband or boyfriend will cheat on her and leave. I think it is a great book for women who need that additional support system. It had some great advice. For the friends I have whose husbands have cheated on them, they definitly followed the script. I recommend this book to anyone who would like to have a greater understanding of cheating men, what signs to look for, and what to do when their husbands are unfaithful.
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15 of 17 people found the following review helpful By Rosamond1 on August 27, 2005
Format: Hardcover
This is an extremely good summary of how men and women behave during the final stages of a marriage break-up. In almost ALL breakups, there is another person involved, i.e. the person wanting to leave wants to leave to start/continue an affair with a third party. This book tells how men behave when they're the ones doing the leaving.

The authors insistence on a "script" that is followed is most clever and makes sense based on what I've observed among my friends. If you're over 30, this book will ring very true to you. We've all seen this behaviour again and again.

My one complaint is that the book tends to bring issues up and then ignore them or not give them the exploration they deserve. All in all, though, this book is an important addition to the popular literature on marriage and divorce and is well worth your time and dollars.
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