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The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship [Kindle Edition]

David Whyte
4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (34 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $17.00
Kindle Price: $11.40
You Save: $5.60 (33%)
Sold by: Penguin Group (USA) LLC

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Book Description

A radical, "crystalline" (Elle) approach to integrating our work, relationships, and inner selves from the bestselling author, poet, and speaker.

The author of Crossing the Unknown Sea and The Heart Aroused encourages readers to reimagine how they inhabit the worlds of love, work, and self-understanding. Whyte suggests that separating these "marriages" in order to balance them is to destroy the fabric of happiness itself. Drawing from his own struggles and the lives of some of the world's great writers and artists-from Dante to Jane Austen to Robert Louis Stevenson-Whyte explores the ways these core commitments are connected. Only by understanding the journey involved in each of the three marriages and the stages of their maturation, he says, can we understand how to bring them together in one fulfilled life.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

David Whyte is a Yorkshire-born poet and consultant who has introduced poetry into such companies as American Express, Boeing and Toyota. He is the author of the bestselling The Heart Aroused: Poetry and the Preservation of the Soul in Corporate America and Crossing the Unknown Sea: Work as a Pilgrimage of Identity as well as several volumes of poetry. He lives with his family on an island near Seattle, in the Pacific Northwest.

From AudioFile

With rich illustrations from literature, the humanities, and his own considered life, poet David Whyte describes why marriage to one person must inevitably be balanced with our unspoken vows to our work and our commitment to continuous self-understanding. The author's poetic language helps these elegant ideas flow into the deepest parts of the soul--freeing us from stuck places, nurturing the courage to adopt new perspectives, and opening up opportunities for growth in our marriages, careers, and inner lives. The author's superb speaking voice and theater-quality interpretive skills make the quotations he offers memorable and often compelling. The beauty and humanity in his performance and the impressive range of sophisticated insights make this one of the most engaging audios available on marriage and life. T.W. Winner of AudioFile Earphones Award © AudioFile 2010, Portland, Maine

Product Details

  • File Size: 649 KB
  • Print Length: 364 pages
  • Publisher: Riverhead Books; Reprint edition (January 20, 2009)
  • Sold by: Penguin Group (USA) LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B001Q8V6NA
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #89,728 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
77 of 80 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars "Most Marriages are Dynamic, Moving Frontiers" February 12, 2009
In 'The Three Marriages', author and poet, David Whyte says, "Most marriages are dynamic, moving frontiers, hardly recognizable to the participants themselves, moving frontiers that occupy edges of happiness and unhappiness all at the same time." (pg. 241). This is the kind of intelligent and useful insight one finds throughout Whyte's most recent book. What is unique about this statement, and many of the ideas developed in this work, is that you could apply this idea to any of the three marriages, the marriage to another, the marriage to one's work, and the marriage to oneself. I believe this is a unique and very helpful way to imagine the relationships in our lives. It is not a question of balance or choosing, but a question of seeing each of our 'marriages' as love affairs in their own right, with all the ups and downs one experiences in a love affair with another person. The way that he illustrates his ideas is not only through is own life experiences, but through the lives of great writers, spiritual teachers and ordinary brave people, such as Jane Austen, Dante, Emily Dickenson, Robert Louis Stevenson, Pema Chodran and JK Rowling to name a few. This makes for a lively, interesting and adventurous read. In the final chapter, "Not a Question of Balance: A Marriage of Marriages", he gives us some new ideas about how we can bring it all together. I won't spoil any secrets, but leave it to your own enjoyable read.
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30 of 31 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars The Three Marriages May 11, 2009
David Whyte weaves the stories of Dante and Beatrice,Robert Louis Stevenson,Jane Austen and others to illustrate the interconnections of relationship with self, work and marriage. I used to think these worlds were separately spinning spheres but each is informed by the other with the relationship with self providing the clarity for the others. Whyte takes the idea of work life balance and turns it on its head to get us to someplace where we understand connection. It can be dense to read at times but he has done a great job of breaking the book up into chapters, sections and reviews at the end of chapters to capture the salient points.
I highly recommend the book to gain insight into personal relationships(I was wondering why I was stuck in a lousy job and a lousy relationship), to discuss as a work group or to discover with a loved one.It would also be a great book group discussion.
Also discover (or rediscover) how poetry can put into words these complexities, particulalry David Whyte's poetry which can be found in other of his books.
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24 of 26 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Some Pretty Terrific Stuff Here! February 25, 2010
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
David posits that we have three very important marriages in our lives: marriage to a partner, our marriage to our work, and that ultimate marriage we should be having with ourselves. He says these things are so closely tied to who we are, that we must look at all three. (probably OFTEN.) He also says we can't expect a perfect balance, and explains why that just doesn't work in the real world. (what a relief!)

I downloaded the audio version and listened to it twice. He addressed so many important areas, using wonderful stories and poems, that finally, after listening to it twice, I ordered a copy of the book so I could highlight all the good stuff I wanted to remember. I'm a happy camper.
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Do not buy the CD version! March 30, 2011
Format:Audio CD|Verified Purchase
This is a review of the CD audiobook version and has nothing to do with the content. Each of the CD's has something like a hundred tracks; each approximately 40 seconds long; some only 20 seconds. And the tracks aren't even divided in logical places; some end/begin mid-sentence! Whomever produced this audiobook did the worst job I've ever experienced and I have hundreds of audiobooks.

Most CD audiobooks are like music CD's - each track is in the five minute range and it's easy to find specific sections of the book by hitting the chapter forward/reverse buttons. It's even better on a computer where I can title each track to reflect the content of the track. I can't do that with this audiobook. There's way too many tracks and they're too short. I chose (and paid extra), for the CD version over the MP3 CD and the Audible versions so I could listen in my car without the hassle of making my own CD's.

I'd definitely recommend purchasing one of the other formats.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Enlightening - a different method for viewing WORK ! March 20, 2011
By Reen
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
David Whyte takes you on an in-depth journey to what you are really about and establishes the words to define how committed we can be to our work. I find I am a sponge just soaking up what he is laying out before the reader. Examine it, see what fits for you, how you define yourself for all 3 levels. I never thought of a marriage to "self", but that is part of our journey throughout our lives. The exploration and acceptable of ourselves does take a commitment - a marriage of sorts. Then there is the "self" that is defined by work, our careers, the companies we work for and colleagues we spend so much time with during the work day. We are always asked "what is it that you do"? at parties, the hairdresser, at a church meeting - every where! I feel I have made my marriage to work my own path. Yes, I followed the rules, but added in what I like to do to make things better, with my colleagues and being true to myself along the way. After 30 years of working, I find this book bring me to a new horizon. How can I re-commit myself to all three and how do I shape the years ahead for me and those I mentor? Enjoy the journey for we are always growing up!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Lovely.
Absolutely beautiful and perceptive descriptions of these relationships and the struggles in and among them. Read more
Published 21 days ago by Lauren E. Tucker McCubbin
1.0 out of 5 stars Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.
I found this book really boring, poorly written and full of sentences that would belong better to fortune cookies than into a book. Read more
Published 1 month ago by SF
5.0 out of 5 stars Meaningful observations on 3 life themes central to all. ...
Meaningful observations on 3 life themes central to all. The language is direct and clear. Mr. Whyte's examples from lives are imaginative and appropriate. Read more
Published 1 month ago by AShirsh
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Good book, all his books are good.
Published 2 months ago by Kris McNew
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Great job!
Published 4 months ago by Allison Purdie
5.0 out of 5 stars Superb balance
This is David Whyte at his best. He has written this book well, describing how we are constantly balancing ourselves between work, self and relationships. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Dr. Peter Davies
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
This book will become one of your best friends!!
Published 8 months ago by Jodi Mathieu
5.0 out of 5 stars I love this book
I love this book, and more importantly, the truths it invites me to contemplate and let in. First, I listened to it all the way through on audio--twice, and then I felt compelled... Read more
Published 8 months ago by Rayellen
5.0 out of 5 stars Good read
Whyte is a gifted poet and communicator, especially in his understanding of poetry place in everyday life, including one's work environment.
Published 13 months ago by G. Robinson
5.0 out of 5 stars Loved it!
I recommended this book to 2 friends and both of them are making moves at changing careers. I love David... Read more
Published 14 months ago by Adriana D.
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More About the Author

Poet David Whyte grew up with a strong, imaginative influence from his Irish mother among the hills and valleys of his father's Yorkshire. He now makes his home, with his family, in the Pacific Northwest of the United States. The author of six books of poetry and three books of prose, David Whyte holds a degree in Marine Zoology and has traveled extensively, including living and working as a naturalist guide in the Galapagos Islands and leading anthropological and natural history expeditions in the Andes, the Amazon and the Himalaya. He brings this wealth of experience to his poetry, lectures and workshops.

His life as a poet has created a readership and listenership in three normally mutually exclusive areas: the literate world of readings that most poets inhabit, the psychological and theological worlds of philosophical enquiry and the world of vocation, work and organizational leadership.

An Associate Fellow at Templeton College and Said Business School at the University of Oxford, he is one of the few poets to take his perspectives on creativity into the field of organizational development, where he works with many European, American and international companies. In spring of 2008 he was awarded an honorary doctorate from Neumann College, Pennsylvania.

In organizational settings, using poetry and thoughtful commentary, he illustrates how we can foster qualities of courage and engagement; qualities needed if we are to respond to today's call for increased creativity and adaptability in the workplace. He brings a unique and important contribution to our understanding of the nature of individual and organizational change particularly through his unique perspectives on Conversational Leadership.

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